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Tum Kaisi Mohabbat karti Ho..!! Tum Jab
Bhi Ghar Par Aati Ho Aur Sab Say Batain
Karti Ho Mein Aout Say Parday ki Janaa'n
Bus Tum Ko Dekhta Rehta Hoon Ik Tum Ko
Dekhnay Ki Khatir Mein Kitna Pagal Hota
Mein Aisi Muhabbat Kerta hoon Tum Kaisi
Muhabbat Kerti Ho..?? Jab Darwazay Par
Dastak Ho Ya Ghanti Phone Ki Bajti Ho Mein
Chor K Sab Kuch Bhagta Hoon Aur Tum Ko Jo
Na Paoon Tou Ji Bhar K Ronay Lagta Hoon
Mein Aisi Muhabbat Kerta Hoon Tum Kaisi
Muhabbat Kerti Ho..?? Mehfil Mein Kahin
Bhi Jana Ho Kapron Ka Selection Kerna Ho
Rang Bohat Say Samnay Bikhray Hoon Us
Rang Pe Dil Aa Jata Hai Jo Rang K Tum Ko
Bhata Hai Mein Aisi Muhabbat Kerta Hoon
Tum Kaisi Muhabbat Kerti Ho..?? Rozana
Apnay College Mein Kisi Aur Ka Lecture
Suntay Hoay Ya Break K Khali Ghantay Mein
dosti Say Batain Kertay Hoay Meray
Dhiyan Mein Tum Aa Jati Ho Mein, Mein
Nahin Rehta Phir Janan Mein Tum Mein Gum
Ho Jata hoon Bus Khuwabon Mein Kho Jata
Hoon Un Aankhon Mein Kho Jata Hoon Mein
Aisi Muhabbat Kerta hoon Tum Kaisi
Muhabbat Kerti Ho..?? Jis Chehray Par Bhi
Nighah Paray Her Chehra Tum Sa Lagta Hai
Wo Sham Ho Ya Ke Dhop Samey Sab Kitna
Bhala Sa Lagta Hai Janay Ye Kaisa Nasha
Hai Garmi Ka Tapta Mausam Bhi Jaray Ka
Maheena Lagta Hai Mein Aisi Muhabbat Kerta
Hoon Tum Kaisi Muhabbat Kerti Ho..?? Tum
Jab Bhi Samnay Aati Ho Mein Tum Say
Sunn'na Chahta Hoon Kash Kabhi Tum Ye Keh
Do Tum Mujh Say Muhabbat Kerti Ho Tum
Mujh Ko Bohat Hi Chahti Ho Lekin Janay
Tum Kyun Chup Ho Yeh Soch K Dil Ghabrata
Hai Aisa Tou Nahin Hai Na janan Sirf Meri
Nazar Ka Dhoka Ho Tum Nay Mujh Ko Chaha
Hi Na Ho Koi Aur Hi Dil Mein Rehta Ho Mein
Tum Say Poochna Chahta hoon Mein Tum Say
Kehna Chahta hoon Lekin Kuch Pooch Nahin
Sakta Mana Ke Muhabbat Hai Phir Bhi Lab
Apnay Khol Nahin Sakta Mein Larka Hoon
Kaisay Keh Doon Mein Kaisi Muhabbat Kerta
Hoon Mein Tum Say Ye Kaisay Pochoon Tum
Kaisi Muhabbat Kerti Ho......!! Chup Chap
See Mein Ho Jata Hoon Phir Dil Mein Apnay
Kehta hoon Mein Aisi Muhabbat Kerta hoon
Tum Kaisi Muhabbat Kerti Ho......
tum kaisi mohabbat karti ho .????????????
An Easy Spiritual Discipline
!! Shri Hari !!
While giving lectures to the children of the demons, Prahladji says – what effort is required in realizing Paramatma (God, Supreme Being) ? - “koti prayaasosurbaalakaah?” (Srimad Bhagwat 7/7/38)
There is one point that one must remember regarding sense objects that, things of this world are not present in all places and at all times. For attaining these, one has to make significant effort. However God is present at all places, at all times, in all beings, and in all situations. There is not a place, time, individual, thing where he is not present. For his attainment all that is needed is intense longing. Just like we have a particular object in our possession, then it is on looking at it that we are able to see it! But to see God, it is not essential to even look in a particular direction, because Paramatma is outside, inside (within-without) and everywhere. Therefore, one can attain Him simply by longing to attain Him!
In realizing God, no effort is required. In this, the only requirement is a deep thirst, a want. And even this want is not difficult. In reality, this need is present in all human beings, naturally and on its own; because man feels something lacking within him, but the mistake he makes is that he wishes to fulfill the deficiency with the aid of the world. All things in this world cannot be acquired by all, they never have and they never will be and even if they are acquired, then too they will not remain with you. Even if the things remain, then, you will not remain. There will definitely be separation from it. Before too there was separation and later on too there will be separation. In between the union is only perceived, it is not there as such. Then too we consider our relationship with those things and desire them, this is a very big mistake.
You have considered yourself to be one with the body, this body is me and this body is mine, this is the main mistake! You are not the body! If you were the body, then you would not die at all and if you died, then you would take the body with you. After dying the body (dead) remains right here, and in that body too we are present. But neither the body goes with us, nor the body stays with us. Therefore accepting that you are the body is a mistake and to consider the body as ours is also a mistake. We cannot keep the body, the way we wish to keep it. We have no control over it, then how is it ours? If the body is not ours, then this money, wealth, glories, family etc. how are they ours? Therefore, what is the difficulty in accepting that this world is not ours? Only God is ours. It has become difficult to regard the thing that is in fact ours – God, as our very own, because we regard the world as ours.
The scriptures say that Paramatma (God) is our very own and the world in not our own - your experience tells you this. At this time though you may not believe this, you are unable to accept this; however do not lose your self-assurance. Do not think that we are unable to accept this at this time. Though it is not believed at this time, but in fact, “I am this body” this is not so. Stay firm with this point. Whether you believe or not, whether you experience it or not, do not worry about it; but do not make this point worthless.
This body is not me, and it is not mine – this point is true, and I am God’s and God is mine, this point is also true. Even on being true, it is not accepted, then this is our weakness. How can our non acceptance make the truth become false?
Questioner - How do we end up making this false?
Swamiji - Whatever we see through our senses, intellect, we consider it to be real and our own; by this the point becomes false. Due to this, even if we are unable to give up sense of mine-ness with those things, then so be it; but “body and world are not mine” this is the truth – that much you must honor. If you don’t see God, then so be it, but God is ours and we are God’s, this point is true. Even if Brahmaji says that “See you are of the world and the world is yours, you are not God’s and God is not yours,” then too clearly say that “Maharaj! We will not listen to your point” So be it, even if we have not experienced this so far, even if it is not entirely sunk in; but this is the truth! God Himself has said - “Mamaivaansho jeevaloke” (Gita 15/7) “this being is a part of Me alone” Saints and great souls have also said so - “ishvar ans jeev avinaashi” (Manas, Uttar. 117/2) Therefore I join my hands and pray to you, have mercy on me and accept this point today. Even if there is no change in you upon acceptance, there is hunger and thirst just like before, there is likes and dislikes just like before, but please do not make these talks false. We are only God’s - accept this, thereafter whether you experience or not , whether you are awakened within or not, do not worry about this. In the end, this point will become firm; because this is the truth.
It is the absolute truth that “Only God is mine, there is no else” (mere to Giridhar Gopal, doosero na koyi.) What is the difficulty in accepting this? You certainly know how to accept. Just as you accept someone as your friend, your Guru etc., similarly you also know about not accepting, just as initially you accepted yourself as a bachelor, but on getting married, you no longer saw yourself as a bachelor, but you begin to accept yourself as a married man. If you leave the household life and become a “sadhu”, then you stop considering the house, the family as your own, and you begin to regard the Guru Maharaj as your very own. Therefore you already know both – about acceptance and non-acceptance. Everyone has knowledge of acceptance and non-acceptance. Now apply this knowledge by engaging only in God, and not in the world.
The mistake we make is that while listening we accept, but then we trivialize it. Whereas that which is not true, we begin to accept it as true. One more mistake we make is that brothers-sisters say that we forget this point. Really speaking if you have firmly accepted this, then even if it is not remembered then so be it. Without remembering, you accept that you are at present in Vrindavan. Has any brother-sister completed even one “mala” repeating that “ I am in Vrindavan”? Just one time you accepted that you are currently in Vrindavan, then do you have to try to remember time and again? Is there any doubt about? When someone asks, you immediately say that you are in Vrindavan. Similarly, without remembering too, the point remains within. When you start to believe that you are in Haridwar, then this will be considered a mistake. Therefore I do not regard the not remembering as a mistake. “I am God’s” - if this is not remembered then it is not a mistake; but the mistake is when one accepts that “I am not God’s and I belong to the world.”
After accepting one time with a true heart that you belong to God, then if you don’t remember at all, so be it. Now what is to be remembered is God’s name. Repeat His divine Name (japa), remember Him, Sing His glories, meditate on His divine play, meditate on His form - these are to be done. After accepting God as your very own, let it be. But do not doubt that you are God’s. Whether you a believe or not, whether you experience or not, do not be concerned.
Many people say that what difference has this made to your life? Even if there are no changes, that is, no change in measurement, no change in weight, no change in color, no change in mannerism, no change whatsoever, then too it is OK! However “I cannot accept, I cannot remember, I am not capable, I don’t have the rights, I am not the proper recipient, I did not meet a Guru, I did not meet any saint, the times are not good, it is the age of Kali yug; the environment is not proper; associations are not good” - by talking about these, do not make trash this point. By applying various tactics, if you continue to make this point trashy, then you will not attain perfection. However, if you do not scrap this point, then surely you will attain complete knowledge. This attainment can be in a few days, months, or it can take years. If you continue to indulge in worldly pleasures, then it will take very long, but in the end you will attain that complete knowledge.
Those who work in the fields, they sow the seed in the fields and feel at ease. That seed gives birth to a sapling on its own. If time and again one takes out the seed to look at it, then the seed will never germinate. There is a story. There was a mango grove. The monkeys were eating mangoes from there so the gardener threw stones at the monkey and scared them off. While going each of the monkeys took one mango in their mouth and one in each of the hands and began to run. The monkeys had a meeting that this evil gardener is not letting us eat the mangoes! Some wise monkeys said that how can they let us eat mangoes from their own groves? If we also have a mango grove, then no one will refuse us from eating mangoes from there. They thought that we have the mango seeds, why don’t we grow these. All we have to do is sow the seed, water it then the grove will be ready, and we will eat plenty of mangoes! On consensus from all those that were present, they decided to proceed. They sowed the mango seed on the bank of a river nearby. Now, time and again they removed the seed to look to see whether the mango had started growing or not, and then they would re-plant it! Till dusk, they kept removing the seed and replanting it! Can a mango grow like this? If you want to farm, then sow the seed, water it, and become free of all worries. That which is not there right now, it will most certainly germinate and appear as sapling; then that which is the truth, why will it not materialize? We are God’s and God is ours – this is the truth and it is spontaneously realized. What is the effort required in accepting this? What force is needed? Do you need some knowledge? Do you need some abilities? The simple straight-forward point is that we are God’s and God is ours; we do not belong to the world, and the world is not ours. Now, do not root is out, like the kernel. In other words, do not test it that are there any changes in us or not? When the seed germinates, the plant will also grow, later on the mangoes will also grow and it will all be great! However have mercy and do not overlook this point. This is a very easy means of God Realization and there is nothing else to be done. Simply, “I am God’s and God is mine.” Do not waiver from this firm determination.
This brother sitting here, first regarded himself as a bachelor, but now he is married therefore he now says that he is not a bachelor. Now if someone asks, are you married? Then will he say, wait a minute, let me think; this year I did not get married, the year before also I did not get married, but twenty years ago I got married, Yes-Yes, now I remember, I am married! Why do you not say so? Because once married, it is done. This is acceptance. Even if someone asks in deep sleep, then too you will say that you are married. Similarly, “ I am God’s and God is mine” this will be remembered without attempting to remember. There will be no mistake in this. A mistake is when you will think that I am not God’s, and God is not mine; because my conduct is not proper, my behavior is not good, Do not raise such obstacles. Even if there is no faith, no trust , no remembrance of God, no changes for the better, life has not improved spiritually, even if nothing whatsoever has happened, then too do not scrap this acceptance (maanyataa), that I am God’s and God is mine.
I have even asked those great men in my eyes and they said, that those men that accept God as their very own, the responsibility of making Himself known to them is borne by God. The reason is only God can make Himself known, we cannot know Him. Where we are incapable, there God’s capabilities come to use. This is such a great point that “ I am God’s and God is mine, I am not the world’s and the world is not mine.” You have the capability of accepting this! Whatever abilities you have, that much you apply. That which you do not have, God will fulfill those. “Sune ri meinne nirbal ke bal Ram.” In those things that you are powerless, there, God’s powers comes to use. However, in those things where you are able to apply your powers, if you do not apply that strength then in this the fault is yours, the responsibility for this is not on God. You accept a few people as your own and others you do not accept as your own - why do you not apply this ability towards God? Whatever you are capable of doing, that is the extent of the hope that God has from you. That which you cannot do, God does not expect that out of you. What do you hope from a little child, do you expect that he carries a heavy bag of wheat flour and bring it home? You only expect as much as he can do. Then does God lack even that much honesty? Will God tell you to do the things that you cannot accept? That which you can accept, you must accept that! That is it! This spiritual discipline that I have shared with you today, is so easy, and so straight-forward and all can do it. Whether someone is a learned and educated person, or uneducated, whether it is a brother or a sister. Whether you have good conduct or bad, whether you have good qualities or bad qualities, whether you are a gentleman or a evil man, however you are, all can simply accept this.
It has been said for a chaste (pativrata) wife -
Ekayi dharma ek barat nemaa |
Kaayam bachan mana pati pad prema ||
(Manas, Aranya. 5/10)
This is my husband, on having a firm acceptance of this, however may be the husband, she will become a chaste wife. Was Ravan a great and extra-ordinary man? However, Mandodari being a chaste wife, followed her “Dharma” properly, whereby she was able to get to know the greatness of Lord Ram, whereas Ravan, even on being told, did not listen! Where did Mandodari gain so much knowledge? This knowledge came from “pativrata dharma”. Can God say that your husband is not of good conduct’ therefore you will not attain salvation? No, He cannot say so. If his conduct is not proper then what are we to do? We have abided in our “pativrata dharma” properly, then God will give it’s full glories - “Binu shram naari param gati lahayi” (Manas, Aranya. 5/18). The responsibility to attain that eternal and highest state, is not on her. That responsibility lies on the scriptures, the saints and on God. She fulfill her “pativrata-dharma” then she is abiding and fulfilling the commands of the Rishis-Munis, Saints-great souls, and God; therefore they will have to give her salvation. If the husband is not capable, then how is it his fault? Mother and father got her married so he became her husband. Her fault will be when she does not follow her “pativrata-dharma”. Similarly “I am God’s and God is mine” - this point, if you do not accept then it is your fault. But if you want to accept from within and you are unable to do so, then don’t be concerned. Apply your complete strength. At the very minimum, do not accept the opposite, do not trash this point. This is an extra-ordinary point that has been shared with you.
I am God’s and God is mine” - only accept this much, then further along what should happen will happen on its own. After accepting this, become free of any uncertainties and ambiguities. Now whatever effort is needed, you do. Do divine name repetition, chant the Lord’s divine name (kirtan), do satsang, engage in spiritual studies, go to the temple, behold the Lord. Do not do any actions that are opposed to God and the scriptures. To the extent that is within your control, as much as you can do, that much you should do. Do not waiver on this point, whether unfavorable times come or favorable; whether someone approves of you or opposes you. This is the truth; thus we have accepted it ! Accepted it once and for all.
Now a question can arise that if we do so, but thereafter do not attain God, then what? The answer to this is that till now, in so many years, what great work have you done, which will be short-changed? If it happens it will be gains only. From all of you present here, any of you tell me, what will be the loss? There will be no loss, and I do not deceive! There will be only gains; because this is the truth, and the truth will ultimately be realized as the truth. How long will a false thing last? By regarding this body and this world as our own, will it become ours? They have never been ours and will never be ours; however, if you regard them as yours, you will have to suffer and you will have to cry! Instead of being deceived by it, and later on accepting it as true, it is better to accept on my saying. Tell me what deception will it lead to? And if you are deceived, then you have been deceived so many times so far, therefore one more time be deceived by my saying! However if amongst you all, if any of you see this as a deception, then tell me brothers! There is no deception oin this whatsoever. Besides gains, there is not the least bit of any losses. Not only do I say this, but God Himself has said this - “mamaivaansho jeevaloke” (Gita 15/7) and Saints and great personalities have said so – “Ishvar ansh jeeva abinaashi” (Manas, Uttar 117/2). Therefore accept, grab hold of this point with a firm conviction. This is the principle that has been agreed upon by saints. Saints and Great Souls have done so and seen for themselves and they have showered us with their grace by writing this down, and to reveal it. Just as some father, earns a lot of wealth, and gives it to his son, then what effort did the son have to go through ? Similarly, this is the wealth earned by the Saints and Great Souls, which they are giving to us. Now it is our duty to protect it, not to waste it. It becomes worthless upon looking at it and doing. You regard as real, those things that are seen with your senses and intellect and the things that are done, but you consider the words of saints and great souls as imperfect. This is a mistake. That which is seen is not there. Actions are not permanent and their fruits are also not permanent. Thus depending on them, by dishonoring the Truth, do not choke the Truth. Do not cause violence to the Truth. By violating the Truth, the Truth is not harmed, rather we are harmed, we only take a fall. Truth will always remain the Truth. Truth will never be wiped out - “Naabhaavo vidhyate satah” (Gita 2/16). If you do not abide in it, you will not benefit. Therefore, accept the point that - “I am God’s and God is mine”. This point is a very easy, but of a very high stature. It encompasses everything.
Narayana! Narayana !! Narayana !!!
From "Bhagwaan se Apnaapan " in Hindi by Swami Ramsukhdasji
2 fozi the..
Ek hindu or dusra musalman.
Dono ek hi border par sath the.
Ek din border par firing ho gyi..
Badkismati se dono hi mare gaye.
Jab unhe wapas ghar laya gya to 2no
Ke body par flag the..
Jab hindu family ko unke bete ki body di gyi toh hindu family ne uski body ko lene se inkar kar diya or kaha ki..
Ye jo mere bete ki body he ye mere bete ki nhi he mujhe mere bete ki body chayiye kisi or ki nhi..
Unki family ko bhut samzhaya par wo ek na sune or zid pe ade rahe..
Fir unhone kha ki ye jo 2nd body he ek muslim bete ki ye muslim bete ki body nhi he.
Ye mere bete ki body he or mujhe mere isi bete ki body chayiye..
Waha khade sab heran or preshan ho gye or khene lage ki ap ye kya khe rahi he aap hosh me nhi he shayad isliye jo man me aa raha ap bole ja rahe ho..
Par us family ne ek ki bhi na suni or zid na chodi..
Waha khada har insaan samz nhi pa raha tha ki ye ho kya raha he..
Ek ma ko apne asli bete ki body pechan me nhi aa rahi or wo ek muslim bete ki body ko apne bete ki body man rahi he..
Par waha khada koi samzhe ya na samzhe par musilm family samaz cuki thi..
Unhone hindu family se kaha ki ap ye body rakh lijiye or hum apke bete ki body apne sath le jayege..
Us din kisi ne na socha hoga ki ye kya ho gya or kya ho raha he..
Us din ek itihas lhika gya tha.
ek hindu ke bete ko pheli bar dafnaya gya tha.
or ek musalman ke bete ko jlaya gya tha..
Us din shi mayne me 2no beto ki kurbani rang layi thi..
Jite jee wo ye na duniya ko samzha paye ki hindu or musalman ek he wo unke marne ke bad unki family duniya ko dhikha gyi..
band bhi karo yaaro jat pat ke naam se ladna hum sab ek he or kya hindu kya musalman humari pechan hi ye indian flag he..
Achi lage toh comment karke btaye or baat ko dil se lgaye..
Qk jab border par ek fozi marta he to uski pechan uske flag uski country se hoti h na ki uske dharm se..
Visiting her grave was part of my routine. If I returned I would know exactly which wooden box to walk too, in which flower patch her body rests and exactly how far beneath the ground her degrading body sits in harmony with the earth. She was ready to die. She was ready to die six months before I forced her body awake every morning. Before I coerced her to eat her wet soggy food. Before I held her so close to my body and dripped my tears of optimism all over her back. She was ready to die long before I decided she should live.
On September 6, 2010 Mother Nature decided that Idaho was ready for winter. The clouds swirled into a monotonous tundra over my home. The hawks mocked us for not being prepared for winter. It’s easier for them – they fill their stomachs and fly south. It was their time to eat. They flew in circles over my chicken shed meditating on their prey. As I saw the commotion in the sky and the craving of flesh in their eyes I knew it was time to corral my chickens.
My chickens roamed around the ten-acre land as they pleased. Some would make their way into my home on occasions and eat the food off the counters and others would go near the barn and roll their bodies into the hay hiding themselves from the rest of the world. The ones with more exploring initiative would lay on their sides in the middle of the fields like they were born in the tropics – stomach turned toward the heat finding every way to become one with the sun. They didn’t succeed but when I would pick those ones off the ground their heat would soak into my body and I would understand their logic. After their day of roaming the world they would find their way back to the coop. The coop was painted with my neighbors and my love. The names of the chickens were written on the walls and amateur drawings covered all the nooks and crannies. It was comforting to me. I wonder if they thought it was too.
As the hawks picked their prey I was frantic. My mom and I frolicked the land, me in search for all my babies and her supporting hers. I was yelling trying to scare away the hawks but they knew I couldn’t fly. I could never reach them. The sound of my petrified voice didn’t pierce the hawks as much as it pierced myself. There was one chicken missing. Where was the last one? I saw her body frantically trapped on the other side of the fence. I guided her around the fence to the shed and I pushed the last chicken into the shed and slammed the door shut. As the door slammed I heard the cries of a bird. Did I miss one? Did a hawk steal it before I did? But the distant noise wasn’t so distant at all. As I turned my head toward the door the chicken I had just saved from the hawk I had shut in the door. She lay – just like she used to lay beneath the sun but this time it was not out of pleasure. I opened the door and my chicken rest, her neck strutting in multiple directions and her eyes looking at me in desperation.
I convinced my mom to let me buy chickens when I was eight. She said “if you pay for them and take care of them – you can get them.” So, I saved my money, did my research, and found it only reasonable to make a business to pay for my chickens. I would sell eggs and thus my chickens would be paid for. And this is what I did. But the relationship between my chickens and I over the years became less of a business venture and more of a companionship. When I heard the arguing in the house I found solace in the chickens outside. I talked to them like I was a chicken myself. I would tell them my secrets and my fears. They would sit in my lap and tilt their head whenever I said something noteworthy. After I paused they would come in with some of their thoughts. It’s too bad I didn’t understand their language.
My chicken laid in my arms. My mom took it upon herself to make a bed in the warmth of our home. I brought the barely breathing chicken to the bed that was so delicately made and placed her in it. My tears of optimism didn’t cover the chicken today – they covered her body creating a coat of pain and suffering. I’m sure this coat wasn’t ever taken off my chicken – but I pretended it didn’t exist. I’m good at pretending.
In the preceding days, every morning, pre-lunch, lunch, pre-dinner, dinner, pre-dessert, and post dessert I would feed my chicken food that I soaked in water so it was soft enough to go down her broken neck. I wasn’t an anatomy expert but somehow I figured that with a neck that looks like a 90-degree angle it might be easier to eat if the food is soft. My chicken laid there day after day – gaining energy by night. I convinced myself or perhaps I dreamed it – that she was getting better. I imagined her standing up. I craved her leading a happy life – the life that she deserved.
My mom used to say that if she got in an accident and was unable to move or do anything with her life that she would want to die. She wouldn’t want her children spending their lives caring for a cause that we cared so deeply for but that she left long ago. Our family likes knowing one another at our best and at our worst. But when our worst makes others suffer it becomes a problem that affects all those around us. When I ponder the chicken months today – I always wonder if my chicken was like my mother. Did she want me to let her die? Did she want to close her eyes and sleep to her death? Had I stripped her of her one wish just like I would strip my mother?
As her health improved and she began to seem more alert to the world we started having daily sessions. In the morning’s we stretched. I would pick her immobile body up and slowly move her legs away from her body. I would do the same for her feet. I trusted I was saving a child from its misery. I know now that death isn’t something to fear. I feared for my chicken – I’m sure she didn’t fear it. I would put her body to the ground like she was walking – reminding her of a past long forgotten. A past that today she only sees in her heaven. I didn’t put any of her weight on the ground – it was more of a presentation. When she gobbled, I thought she was telling me things. I would listen and try to pick up on her words. But somehow her gobbles never translated to English.
When people visited our home, they wondered why my mother let me keep a dying chicken in our bathroom. You couldn’t use that bathroom because it smelled of manure and death – so people were ushered to the one in my mother’s room. My mom and I thought it was normal. She was a part of the family. I considered her a part of me just like a person would consider their sibling a part of them. My mother felt the same way. Often when I slept in too late my mom would do my job for me. She would help her walk and feed her her wet food. I remember her words ringing in my head “if you take care of them, you can get them.” I knew she believed this but my mother would also check in on my chicken day and night when I couldn’t care for her myself. She is a mother after all. I learned my ways from her.
A month later my chicken could stand up. I never thought her progress would be so vast. Balancing was a difficult task for her. Her vision was off – or at least something was because when she stood up to eat her food – she would go to peck the liquid matter but she would miss and peck the ground instead. It would take her a few tries to get her beak into the bowl. I didn’t know how to teach her without moving her head in the right direction. Sometimes I would place my hands around the bowl covering the ground. My chicken knew when she pecked me – she never wanted to peck me so she would try to find the bowl. When the days were still warm I would bring her under the hot sun to some of her favorite places – to the sawdust where she used to roll or to the blanket of grass where she would heat her body. She loved the days when it was warm. She would place herself near a tree and sprawl on the ground.
Sometimes my mother would come play the guitar outside. Her lyrics penetrated the atmosphere. She wasn’t playing for anyone – or at least anyone I knew of. But I know my chicken would sit under the tree a few feet away from her and she would turn her head, in any way she knew how, to look at my mother. She would tilt her head, a sober sign of listening and she would keep it that way until my mother’s words receded. Then she would go back to sticking her beak into the ground in search of insects but whenever my mom started up again she would always repeat her actions. I think her voice was a gift into a world of pleasure that was absent from her life. My mother’s voice was a gift to more than one.
As time went on my chicken became stronger. She could walk. Her head and neck leaned to one side of her body making her unbalanced. When she could walk, she would only go in a circle. Her circles eventually got bigger and some days she would make it all the way across the yard by way of circles. When I think about spending life only able to move in circles it makes me shiver.
We could never reintroduce her to the other chickens because they would peck her to death. Chickens are cruel birds – or cruel to the human eye. If one has a disability they will peck it until it dies. I couldn’t let this happen – but maybe that’s the way of the chicken world – and maybe that’s what is best.
My chicken would go to the fence and stand at it looking at all the other ones on the other side of the fence. She looked in desperation as if she was so alone – as if she wanted to be pecked to death – as if she was ready to take death. I couldn’t bear to see her own kind kill her and I couldn’t leave her knowing exactly what was going to happen when I left.
By May 8, 2010 my chicken acted as if she had never got her neck crushed in a door. She laid eggs, she only tilted her head slightly and she befriended the less cruel chickens. She still slept in a different place than them, she would still eat wet food, and I would still watch her with a hawk’s eye.
Months later I walked into her bed and she lied there dead. I still wonder what caused it. Was it her age? Was it something from the event that occurred seven months earlier? Or was she just ready to die?
We buried her on the same day and my tears covered the dirt of where she lay. My tears soaked the area – I’m sure they reached her body that lied so far beneath the dirt. Her body lays in the dirt that I shed my tears on today. But, she doesn’t lay there. She is somewhere, in some beautiful place, dancing with the land just of how she always dreamed. A rock lay by her grave and on it are the words ‘Crazy 8.’ We called her Crazy 8. Her name is Crazy 8.
Honshle ki chhayontale ab hai iradon ko pakka karna
Ab nehi hai koi bhi gila sikba rakhna
Ab hai ek dujhe k khatir ladhna
Bohot ho gya chupchap baithe sehte rehna
In candlemarches hai hota hai...gunhegaar ko kuchh din jail hoti hai...fir..
fir usse chhod diya jaata hai...to yeh kaisa insaaf hota hai...insaaf to barabari ki honi chahiye...sirf jail nehi usse kuchh jyada sajaa ka haqdaar wo bante hain...hum kisiko saaja kiuun dete hai taaki unko apne galti ka ehsaas ho... lekin koi agar yeh maane hi na ki usne galti kiya hai...aur bass jail jaane ko sabak na maane to saaja ka kya hoga...saaja kuchh aisa ho ki unki ruuh kaanp uthe...wo jinda to rahe magar pal pal marr jaane ko tarshe tabhi to uske saath kiye gaye julmo ka ehsaas hoga...aur tabhi to aayega dil mein paschatap ki vabna...kisine kya khub kahaan hai ki...agar hum ek dujhe ki beheno ki ijjat karna suru karde to yeh duniyaa bakhi mein jannat ban jayegi...hum to yeh bhi kehte hai...ladko ko bhi jaise ladkiyon ki ijjat karni chahiye waise hi ladkoyoon ko bhi unhe barabar ka ijjat dena chahiye...jiske saath anyay hota hai dard sirf unhiko mehsoos nehi hota...dard kuchh unko bhi ghayal kar jaata hai jinke saath yehsab ho chuka hai lekin firbhi chup rehne ko majboor hai...aur unko bhi mehsoos hota hai jinke dil mein abhibhi insaniyat banchi hai...agar ek sunehara desh dekhhna chahte ho to...rok lo apne bhai ko agar wo kisi ladki k bareme kuchh galtsalt bole...samjhao apne dosto ko ki wo kisi ladki ko uske marji k khilaf tank na kare...aur haan sabse pehla sudhaar apne ghar pe layoon baaki duniya aise hi sudhar jayegi...Mummy Papa ka respect karo...unki baaton ko suno...agar aap dekho ki apke parents k beech mein mutual respect nehi hai ya apke papa mummy ko maarti hai to tabhi aap apna awaz uthao...fark nehi padhta ki aap ladka ho ya ladki...bass jahaan kuchh galt dekho apna awaz uthao...agar dekho ki apka bada bhai mummy papa ko maarta hai ya behen mummy papa ki baat nehi sunti hai...awaz uthao...bass iss darr se chup na raho ki log kya sochenge...ghar jab tumhrara hai...sambhaloge bhi tum hi...agar aap dekhhte ho ki apka chhota bhai kisi galat group mein fansh rha ya nasha ke changul mein fansh raha to yeh apki jimmedari hai ki aap uska sangat sudhare aur use counselling k liye le jaaye...samaaj ki parba tab mat karna kiuun ki koi chahe kitna bhi kehle apke family se jyada pyaar apse koi nehi karega...agar aap dekhhte ho apke behen kisi galt sangat mein jaa rahi hai...to use sudharna aapka kaam hai...use duniyadari ki paath padhana aapka kaam hai...usse yeh jarur bataiye ki jangli janwar itne khatarnak nehi hote hai jitne ki behrupiye insaan...usse kahiye ki agar kisiko 100% bharosa kare to at least 1% shaak bhi kare...na jaane kaun kab dhoka de jaaye...jab andhere apna parchhayi saath nehi deta to kisi aur ka kya bharosa... Always remember Doesn't matter you are a boy or a girl...never play with anyone's feelings...that might be dangerous too...agar aap ladki hai aur aap apne aashiq ya pati ko chhode bina hi kisise judd gaye...to yeh galt hai, aisa ho sakta hai ki aap kisi aur k pyaar mein padh jao lekin iska matlab yeh nehi ki aap apne aashiq ya pati ko dhoka de...aap unhe sachhai se rubaru karwaiye...unhe manane ki koushish kijiye fir hi kisi aur relationship mein jaiyee...agar aap ladke hai to sabse pehle apne mashuka ya apne biwi ka bharosa kabhi na todiye...aisa ho sakta hai ki aap kisi aur k pyaar mein gir jayoo...to unhe apni baat bataao uss rishte mein agee mat badh jaana pehle hi...haan unka dil tuntega lekin wo sachha pyaar karegi to jarur jaane degi...aakhir pyaar rokne ka naam nehi hai, nahi pyaar jorjabardasti ka kaam hai, agar aapko kisise sachha pyaar ho to duur se hi sahi lekin apke aankho mein unka hi chehra hoga...ishq harwakt paane ka naam nehi hota...sachhe pyaar mein jism ki talab nehi hoti usme to ruuh judte hain...milan naseebwalon ka hi hota hai...is darr se ishq karna na chhodiye...kiuun ki ektarfa ishq kisike baaton se kaam nehi ho jaati...ishq ho agar iktarfa to rok lo khud ko...par usse pehle ijhaar karke dekhh lena maan jayee to thik...nehi to duur se chahte rehna ya apna rasta modd lena...
Agar aap maata ya pitaa ho to apne bachho ki mann ki baat samajhne ki koushish kariye...aap hi unhe bataiyee ki kuchh bane na bane pehle ek achha insaan bane...bachho se dosti kariye...unke kaise dost hai wo janiyee...unki pasand,na-pasand janiyee, ho sakta hia ki aap unke jarurato ko poora na kar payee, unhe apke tarike se jeena sikhaiye, boliye galt tarike se kamaya huya paise se khane se achha hum bhuke hi reh jayee...unhe bataiyee ki mehnat karke jiyee...bohot bura lagta hai jab kisiko lachari k bawajood bhi aise bheek mangne ko majboor dekhhte hai...yeh hamara desh hai jahaan bhukonko roti nehin milti aur desh tarakki ki baat karta hai...free mein internet free mein data unko milta hai jinko unka jarurat bhi nehi hai...free mein cycle, sports.k maydaan banane ko paisa milta hai, gayoon aur seher ki beautification ka paysa milta hai... layoo thoda change pehle...dena hi hai to kuchh aisa bandobast karo ko is desh mein koi bhuka na soye...dena hai to ghar do unko jo foorpath pe soote hai...dena hain to kapde do jinke dhulmitti bhare kapde unke ashko ka bojha jhel na paate hai...dildaar bahut hai yahaan...lekin insaaniyat bahut kaam...ekdin apne movie ricket k paise se kisi bhuke ko roti khilake dekhho uska duyaa aur honto ki hansi tumhare mann mein jo khayal jagyaegi...wohi hogi sachhi khushi...apne shaukbko duur rakhh kisi aur ki khushiyaan kharid lo...tumhe kou aisa tohfe mein mil jayega jo tumhare khusiyoon ka khayaal rakhhe...
Bass sirf saaja dena kaafi nehin gunaah ka ehsaas karwana bhi padega...tabhi milegi nanhi nanhi kaliyoon ko insaaf jo hawas k payrotale kuchal diye gaye...Band kariye aise hi kisi bhi wajah se kisi ko tadpana,maarna,nochna,beijjat karna...Barna ab jo leher uthegi to bahaa le jayegi saari darindigi tab zindagi ka namunishaan nehi rahega...
Kya un darindo ko apne Maa ka chehra najar na aaya, ki jisne use janam diya wo bhi ek naari hi hai...Wo Maa aaj apne konkh pe sharminda hogib ki usne apne nasl ko khatm karnewale ko janm de diya...kya najar nwhi aaya wo chehra jo haath mein rakhi bandh yeh kehti hai, bhai mere mera khayal rakhna, apni behen ki ijjat aur dusro ki behen k saath jo chahe karoge to tumhari wohi behen sharminda hogi tumhe apna bhai kehne se...Kya najar nehi aaya unhe wo chehra jo yeh kehti hai,"Aji wakt pe khana kha lena aur jaldi ghar laut aana"...sharm nehi aayi unhe apne biwi ko dhoka detw wakt...Ro rahi hogi wo aaj apne kismat par ki jisko usne bhagwan ka daeja diya wo haywan nikla...Kya najar nehi unhe wo chehra jo yeh kehti hai ki papaji aaj chocolate le aana lautte wakt...nafrat hogyi hogi aaj use chocolate se jo usike jaise kisi masum ko itna tadpaaya gaya...Aaj un sabke dilon bhi Angare jal rahi hogi...Bharosa nehi un darindone sabko toda hai...
Never judge someone by their profession or caste or religion oe colour...watch their humanity... sometimes they can be god and sometimes they can be the Brutal Devil...
This is what Life...Follow these words and our universe would be a Heaven...