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Why Generation Y is Unhappy :|
Lucy is part of Generation Y, the generation born between the late 1970s and the mid 1990s. She’s also part of a yuppie culture that makes up a large portion of Gen Y.
I have a term for yuppies in the Gen Y age group—I call them Gen Y Protagonists & Special Yuppies, or GYPSYs. A GYPSY is a unique brand of yuppie, one who thinks they are the main character of a very special story.
So Lucy’s enjoying her GYPSY life, and she’s very pleased to be Lucy. Only issue is this one thing:
Lucy’s kind of unhappy.
To get to the bottom of why, we need to define what makes someone happy or unhappy in the first place. It comes down to a simple formula:
It’s pretty straightforward—when the reality of someone’s life is better than they had expected, they’re happy. When reality turns out to be worse than the expectations, they’re unhappy.
To provide some context, let’s start by bringing Lucy’s parents into the discussion:
Lucy’s parents were born in the 50s—they’re Baby Boomers. They were raised by Lucy’s grandparents, members of the G.I. Generation, or "the Greatest Generation," who grew up during the Great Depression and fought in World War II, and were most definitely not GYPSYs.
Lucy’s Depression Era grandparents were obsessed with economic security and raised her parents to build practical, secure careers. They wanted her parents’ careers to have greener grass than their own, and Lucy’s parents were brought up to envision a prosperous and stable career for themselves. Something like this:
They were taught that there was nothing stopping them from getting to that lush, green lawn of a career, but that they’d need to put in years of hard work to make it happen.
After graduating from being insufferable hippies, Lucy’s parents embarked on their careers. As the 70s, 80s, and 90s rolled along, the world entered a time of unprecedented economic prosperity. Lucy’s parents did even better than they expected to. This left them feeling gratified and optimistic.
With a smoother, more positive life experience than that of their own parents, Lucy’s parents raised Lucy with a sense of optimism and unbounded possibility. And they weren’t alone. Baby Boomers all around the country and world told their Gen Y kids that they could be whatever they wanted to be, instilling the special protagonist identity deep within their psyches.
This left GYPSYs feeling tremendously hopeful about their careers, to the point where their parents’ goals of a green lawn of secure prosperity didn’t really do it for them. A GYPSY-worthy lawn has flowers.
This leads to our first fact about GYPSYs:
GYPSYs Are Wildly Ambitious
The GYPSY needs a lot more from a career than a nice green lawn of prosperity and security. The fact is, a green lawn isn’t quite exceptional or unique enough for a GYPSY. Where the Baby Boomers wanted to live The American Dream, GYPSYs want to live Their Own Personal Dream.
Cal Newport points out that “follow your passion“ is a catchphrase that has only gotten going in the last 20 years, according to Google’s Ngram viewer, a tool that shows how prominently a given phrase appears in English print over any period of time. The same Ngram viewer shows that the phrase ”a secure career“ has gone out of style, just as the phrase “a fulfilling career” has gotten hot.
To be clear, GYPSYs want economic prosperity just like their parents did—they just also want to be fulfilled by their career in a way their parents didn’t think about as much.
But something else is happening too. While the career goals of Gen Y as a whole have become much more particular and ambitious, Lucy has been given a second message throughout her childhood as well:
This would probably be a good time to bring in our second fact about GYPSYs:
GYPSYs Are Delusional
”Sure,“ Lucy has been taught, ”everyone will go and get themselves some fulfilling career, but I am unusually wonderful and as such, my career and life path will stand out amongst the crowd.“ So on top of the generation as a whole having the bold goal of a flowery career lawn, each individual GYPSY thinks that he or she is destined for something even better—
A shiny unicorn on top of the flowery lawn.
So why is this delusional? Because this is what all GYPSYs think, which defies the definition of special:
SPECIAL: better, greater, or otherwise different from what is usual.
According to this definition, most people are not special—otherwise “special” wouldn’t mean anything.
Even right now, the GYPSYs reading this are thinking, “Good point...but I actually am one of the few special ones“—and this is the problem.
A second GYPSY delusion comes into play once the GYPSY enters the job market. While Lucy’s parents’ expectation was that many years of hard work would eventually lead to a great career, Lucy considers a great career an obvious given for someone as exceptional as she, and for her it’s just a matter of time and choosing which way to go. Her pre-workforce expectations look something like this:
Unfortunately, the funny thing about the world is that it turns out to not be that easy of a place, and the weird thing about careers is that they’re actually quite hard. Great careers take years of blood, sweat and tears to build—even the ones with no flowers or unicorns on them—and even the most successful people are rarely doing anything that great in their early or mid-20s.
But GYPSYs aren’t about to just accept that.
Paul Harvey, a University of New Hampshire professor and GYPSY expert, has researched this, finding that Gen Y has ”unrealistic expectations and a strong resistance toward accepting negative feedback,” and “an inflated view of oneself.” He says that ”a great source of frustration for people with a strong sense of entitlement is unmet expectations. They often feel entitled to a level of respect and rewards that aren’t in line with their actual ability and effort levels, and so they might not get the level of respect and rewards they are expecting.“
For those hiring members of Gen Y, Harvey suggests asking the interview question, ”Do you feel you are generally superior to your coworkers/classmates/etc., and if so, why?“ He says that “if the candidate answers yes to the first part but struggles with the ‘why,’ there may be an entitlement issue. This is because entitlement perceptions are often based on an unfounded sense of superiority and deservingness. They’ve been led to believe, perhaps through overzealous self-esteem building exercises in their youth, that they are somehow special but often lack any real justification for this belief.”
And since the real world has the nerve to consider merit a factor, a few years out of college Lucy finds herself here:
Lucy’s extreme ambition, coupled with the arrogance that comes along with being a bit deluded about one’s own self-worth, has left her with huge expectations for even the early years out of college. And her reality pales in comparison to those expectations, leaving her ”reality — expectations" happy score coming out at a negative.
And it gets even worse. On top of all this, GYPSYs have an extra problem that applies to their whole generation:
GYPSYs Are Taunted.
Sure, some people from Lucy’s parents’ high school or college classes ended up more successful than her parents did. And while they may have heard about some of it from time to time through the grapevine, for the most part they didn’t really know what was going on in too many other peoples’ careers.
Lucy, on the other hand, finds herself constantly taunted by a modern phenomenon: Facebook Image Crafting.
Social media creates a world for Lucy where
A) what everyone else is doing is very out in the open,
B) most people present an inflated version of their own existence, and
C) the people who chime in the most about their careers are usually those whose careers (or relationships) are going the best, while struggling people tend not to broadcast their situation.
This leaves Lucy feeling, incorrectly, like everyone else is doing really well, only adding to her misery:
Oh that’s why Lucy is unhappy, or at the least, feeling a bit frustrated and inadequate. In fact, she’s probably started off her career perfectly well, but to her, it feels very disappointing.
Here’s my advice for Lucy:
1) Stay wildly ambitious. The current world is bubbling with opportunity for an ambitious person to find flowery, fulfilling success. The specific direction may be unclear, but it’ll work itself out—just dive in somewhere.
2) Stop thinking that you’re special. The fact is, right now, you’re not special. You’re another completely inexperienced young person who doesn’t have all that much to offer yet. You can become special by working really hard for a long time.
3) Ignore everyone else. Other people’s grass seeming greener is no new concept, but in today’s image crafting world, other people’s grass looks like a glorious meadow. The truth is that everyone else is just as indecisive, self-doubting, and frustrated as you are, and if you just do your thing, you’ll never have any reason to envy others.
If Shazam (DC comics) had a Hindu Patheon, what Gods would be there to provide similar powers and fulfill the acronym
How about a story instead of typical answer? :D
Let's make it DC comics proof :D
If I make a movie script out of this-
Things will be like this-
This will be in DC universe in India-
The name of the movie will be - Shazam The Rise of Captain Marvel
Bilu Bains (14–15 years old) was an orphan growing up in mordern day Gujarat.
Growing up, just like any other Indian, he was a crazy fan of Cricket.
And being in the DC universe, of course Superheroes.
He was a crazy fan of SUPERMAN and secretly had a huge boyhood crush on Wonder Woman.
His orphan house was named Happy Home.
One day, a girl named Priyanka Bagri joined their orphan.
She was very beautiful and cute.
All the boys (including Bilu) were lining up to impress her.
But Bilu was a very small boy compared to his peers of same age even compared to Priyanka (sadly :C)
Other boys make constant fun of his rather shorter stature
He was already insecured being an orphan and constant mocking from the others didn't help his cause either.
He became even more shy. As a result, he had no chance of getting Priyanka's attention
One day, Priyanka suddenly entered his room and found him kissing a Wonder Woman poster.
He was embarrassed out of his mind.
Priyanka was laughing her heart out.
Bilu quickly run away from there.
And he was crying sitting under a tree out of embarrassment, poor luck everything.
Suddenly, he saw a nearby temple of Krishna.
He went there to pray and said, “Why are you keeping me alive, God? I am such embarrassment to everyone and myself. Why couldn't you kill me, Bhagwan?”
Priest of the mandir (temple) said to him, “Don't worry boy, everyone has trouble, pray to the Krishna with open heart and pure mind, I am sure Krishna will respond”
One day, his neighbourhood uncle who worked in government survey office came to Bilu and said, “I have good news and bad news, I have found your parents”
Bilu was over the moon hearing such good news, he said, “Tell me more, Akash uncle, tell me more, I can't wait to meet them”
Akash uncle said with a sad face, “I am afraid Bilu, I have a bad news, your parents aren't alive, their names were Vikas and Preeti Bains, both of them were a very renowned world famous archeologist, they went to a tour to Egypt and there they made a world famous discovery of the tomb 'Theo Adam', after that I don't know exactly what happened but your parents died, someone murdered your parents, I am afraid that mystery is still unsolved but the rumour is that it is more of an Superhero Supervillain stuff which means it is completely out of the hands of ordinary people like us, I am very very sorry, Bilu”
Bilu didn't say anything but ran away again and went behind the Krishna temple where nobody would go and he was crying.
Suddenly, he heard a noise of a foot steps, he looked back and saw Priyanka was coming this way. He quickly dried his eye water.
Priyanka said, “Bilu, everyone was looking for you everywhere and you are sitting here??? Are you crying? What happened?”
Bilu said, “Nothing, let's go”
Priyanka said, “No, tell me everything”
Bilu told her everything and cried on her shoulder for awhile.
A few days later, Bilu went to his birth parent's house, it was a big house in city area.
Akash uncle was talking with an attorney who was saying to him that if he could prove that Bilu was their original son then Bilu would get everything their parents own according to the will.
Akash uncle was very excited hearing that as he was thinking how he could become Bilu's legal guardian lawfully as he knew Bilu from his childhood.
Bilu didn't mind since Akash uncle was the one who informed him about his parents.
The attorney said to Bilu that since he wasn't 18 yet so he won't get access to all the money that was the reason for a guardian.
Only thing he would get from his parents directly was their personal diary and an artifact.
Akash uncle was slightly hesitant giving it to him directly thinking it could be valuable but after seeing that it was just an lightning designed scarab of some kind of Egyptian symbol, he gave it to Bilu without any care.
After becoming a legal guardian of Bilu, Akash uncle became very increasingly angry and abusive towards Bilu.
Money completely changed Akash uncle
He used to get drunk every night and was becoming very bad mood every night, some days he used to directly bring prostitute to Bilu's home.
Bilu could not put up with this abuse any more when one day Akash uncle was trying to beat him, he took a Cricket bat a bashed in his head.
Akash uncle just fall flat on the ground and blood was coming out of his head.
Bilu was tremendously shocked realising what he did.
He quickly ran away from the house and just running and running without realising where he was exactly going.
Suddenly, he saw everything was dark around him and he was outside of a purana mandir (old temple).
He was shaking with fear imagining the worst.
Suddenly, he heard a voice.
Bilu was even more scared.
But that voice was telling him not to be scared in a very reassuring tone and to get inside the temple.
Bilu became more confident and less fearful hearing that reassuring tone.
When he entered the temple he saw various old status of Durga, Brahma, Kali, Shiva, Natraj, Ganesha, Hanuman etc basically various Hindu Gods.
He suddenly saw an old man with a long white beard smiling at him and said, “Don't be afraid Bilu, nothing to be afraid, this is God's place, no harm will happen to you here”
Bilu asked, “Who are you? And why am I here? And how?”
Old man said with a smile, “That's becuase I wanted you to come here, my name is Champion, I have been called in various names in various parts of the world, in this part of the world, I am known as Vishwa”
Bilu asked, “What? I thought you died in War of Mahabharata”
Old man said, “Ha, ha, it's much more complicated than that but my past isn't important here, I am protector of this world for a long long time, I have been blessed by various Gods in the past, I have been to various places, I have given powers to various men so that they take on this mentle after me but unfortunately some of them didn't work very well, specially the last one, that's why I was looking for a suitable candidate for a long time very very carefully, I believe you are that candidate, Bilu”
Bilu said, “What's that? I don't understand!!!! But anyway it doesn't matter because I am a faulty individual, I just killed my guardian, I am pretty sure I am going to hell”
Old man laughed hard and said, “Ha, ha, Bilu, nothing like that, nothing like that, your uncle is in hospital, he is not dead, he is severely injured, probably have concussion but not dead, you have nothing to worry, he deserved that, that's what called 'Karma', I have chosen you because you grew up in poverty, still you possess such good heart, you are compassionate to other people, you know adversity, you are mocked everyday for your poor luck yet you didn't go bad, that is the sign of pure heart of somebody who could handle such godly power”
Bilu said, “But I am just a boy what can I do when Steppenwolf will attack earth, I am not SUPERMAN, I can't save the world like Superheroes like him”
Old man again laughed hard and said, “Oh! Bilu, Billu, such innocence!! Ha, ha, you have been awarded with the power of almighty Shiva with infinite strength and wisdom, you have the power of immortality of Hanuman, with the tactical fighting techniques and skills of Arjuna, with speed and flight powers of Zaruda, with the power of invulnerability of Ardra, with the mystical and shape shifting power of Mohini, and with their acronym when you uttered the word 'Shazam' (S.H.A.Z.A.M), you will become all powerful Captain Marvel aka Shazam aka the new Champion”
Bilu said, “Wow, it's just mind blowing, Should I say then Shazam?”
And then and there he quickly became a big muscular dude.
Bilu said, “What happened? I don't feel any difference”
Old man said with a smile, “Look at that broken glass”
Suddenly, Bilu saw himself in an orange, white and green costume with a big huge muscular Man's body”
Bilu said, “Wow, that is me!!!! Wow, I look very intimidating, I look very bad ass but costume is slightly meh but I can work with that”
Suddenly, Bilu saw himself flying.
He said to the oldman, “Sir, I can't control these powers, good bye then I guess”
He heard that the old man was laughing
After some time, he started to control his flight powers and he came towards his old orphan house.
And saw a bulldozer was trying to destroy their old orphan house.
Some promoter was trying to build an shopping mall there.
Everybody was crying as his paid thugs were controlling them in the gun point.
One thug slapped Priyanka after she tried to released herself from his grip.
Bilu could not stop himself anymore, he flew there and landed infront of them slightly embarrassingly.
Bilu said to himself, “That was embarrassing, I need more practice in my landing”
Bilu said to the thugs, “Stop, what you are doing now, these children don't have any place to live, if you want this land at least give them a good place to live”
One of them said, “Who are you supposed to be? Another one of those SUPERMAN wannabe, don't you heroes have more important things to attend? Get out of here, even police are with us, noone will say anything against us”
Shazam said, “I am going to stop you, just because you guys twisting the law with your intimidation, it's not going to work here”
One of them laughed and said, “Another costume joker who takes himself seriously, let's show him his place”
But he could not move an inch Shazam
Shazam said with a chuckle, “Something troubling you, man?”
He said, “Wow, what do you eat, man? You are freakishly strong”
Shazam said with smile, “A lot of green vegetables and exercise, you should try it sometime”
Another thug said, “He is making fun of us, let's end this drama by shooting him”
But to their surprise, “All the bullets were deflecting Shazam”
They were panicked and said, “What is he made of? Shit!!!”
Another one said, “Let's squash him” in saying this he drove the bulldozer over Shazam but to their surprise the front side of bulldozer completely destroyed in the clash.
Shazam picked up the bulldozer and said with a smile, “I think you should get off the vehicle, man”
The driver jumped and ran away as quickly as possible.
Their leader was watching everything now, he said, “This is not a fun and game, so you are invincible, but these people are not” in saying this he took and machine gun and fired over the people and Bilu's friends.
To their surprise, they saw a blur moved very quickly infront of them and suddenly it stopped and they saw Shazam was standing infront of them with handful of bullets.
Shazam said to him, “Now, you are pissing me off”
All the thugs were running away as quickly as possible as if their lives were in the line.
Priyanka asked to Shazam, “Who are you? What is your name?”
Shazam said, “Call me the new Champion, the new Superhero, the protector of the earth”
Everybody was cheering his name and laughing and dancing and celebrating their victory against the gang.
Shazam, himself also joined them.
Suddenly, a guy in blue read cape appeared infront of them
Shazam shouted with delight and surprise, “WOW, SUPERMAN”
Superman said with a smile, “I was watching everything from sky, I heard everything, I was coming here to handle everything but then I saw you, you are very impressive, keep doing what you are doing, it makes my life slightly easier”
Shazam said, “Thanks SUPERMAN for your compliment, I am a huge fan of yours”
Superman said with a smile, “For the things that I have seen today, I might become your fan too”
When SUPERMAN was about to fly, Shazam said, “Will you introduce me to the other Justice leaguers?”
Superman said, “Certainly, one day”
Shazam said, “Wonder Woman?”
Superman said with a huge smile, “You liked her, didn't you? Okay, I will”
Shazam said, “You promised”
Superman said with shaking his head, “Ha, ha, next time” in saying this he flew away
Everybody was still cheering Shazam
It was getting very crowded.
Shazam also flew away behind that old Krishna temple and uttered the word 'Shazam' and transformed into Bilu again”
When he entered the Happy Home, he saw everyone was still cheering Shazam's name and comparing him with SUPERMAN.
Bilu said to them, “Voosh, this guy is a novice, SUPERMAN is SUPERMAN”
Priyanka said, “I don't know about that, the things that he did today, I would say he can beat even SUPERMAN”
A few days later-
Bilu was in his parent's house, he was looking at that artifact and thinking about how similar it looked to his Shazam costume's scarab, suddenly, that artifact became very very hot and he dropped it.
That artifact Buzzing and humming some Weird sounds.
It suddenly flew away.
Bilu quickly became Shazam and followed it by flying.
He was flying for a long time, as he crossed seas and oceans and mountains and deserts, he suddenly realised that he was in Egypt and infront of some old Egyptian tomb with similar sign like that artifact.
That artifact just went into one perfectly shaped position of that tomb and almost worked as key and opened the tomb's door.
He saw an old mummy lying there all covered with heavily bandaged.
Suddenly, he heard noise of the guards and Billu thought he probably broke some local laws by coming here without any permission.
So he flew away back to India.
In the meantime when local guards came there, they felt earth quake.
Then they saw the tomb's door was opened
They were scared as it was cursed area and it was the tomb of ‘THEO ADAM', THE BLACK ADAM OF EGYPTIAN KING.
Suddenly, they heard an weird humming sound coming from the mummy.
They got close to the mummy to look more clearly and that mummy suddenly came alive and took the head off that guard.
Other guards were panicking and was shooting towards it but to their disappointment nothing happened and it ript apart everyone of them one after another
And shouted with tremendous earth trembling anger -
The movie should end here
So how do you like this?
It's cool if you don't :D
You are my pain curing,
You are my thoughts hearing,
You are my progress rising,
That's why soul of mine is good..
I am trying to be good,
Don't worry I am like developing wood,
Your eye is only on me stood,
That's why soul of mine is good..
Whenever I am being scold,
You are advising me to keep hold,
And not to lose hope on being scold,
That's why soul of mine is good..
I am trying to do my best I could,
But you are behind me & walks to extent you should,
Without your help I was not able to stood,
That's why soul of mine is good..
You are that person who blessed me like a tactor,
You are my bene factor,
And don't let me lose hope,
That's why soul of mine is good..
To score the highest marks,
And to get good remarks
You always advised me to do my best,
And after that take some time to rest,
That's why soul of mine is good..
- Sahaj Sabharwal.
Jammu city, Jammu and Kashmir, India.
Gita on Character Building
Human body is only for attaining God (Paramatma). etc. Therefore, if one becomes determinate on the one aim of God Realization, then man will turn towards God. On turning towards God, good qualities-good conduct come on their own, and character building begins to take place. However, if man forgets about God Realization, and begins to hoard worldly possessions and enjoy sense pleasures, then he falls down in character. He who loses his character, is not even worthy and deserving of being called a man.“Par drohee par daar rat par dhan par apabaad |Te nar paanvar paapamai deha dhare manujaad ||(Manas 7/39)Bhagavad Gita’s entire spiritual instructions are for building character. Previously, Arjuna’s sentiment was to fight the war, therefore he invited Lord and accepted Him in the form of a charioteer and became ready to enter the battlefield to fight. However, Lord’s intent was to see to Arjuna’s eternal good (salvation). Arjuna said that place the chariot in-between both the armies so that I can see who is present to fight me with both hands. The Lord, did exactly as told and placed the chariot right in between both the armies and said, that see the members of the Kuru dynasty (1/21-25). On hearing the word, Kuru dynasty, Arjuna suddenly became conscious of his family, affiliated with his body. He became frightened by the thought that all of them will die and thus turning away from his duty, said – I will not fight. To turn away from one’s duty is the main obstacle in character building. The Lord said – O’ What are you doing? It is your duty to fight, therefore giving up attachment and cowardliness, stand up to fight (Gita 2/2-3).It is only to engage man in the path of duty that Bhagavad Gita manifested. It is only in renouncing your rights and properly performing your duties that character is developed, whereas on neglecting your duties the character is destroyed. God says – “Na tvevaaham jaatu naasam….” (Gita 2/12) - Here the Lord begins His spiritual instructions and first deliberates on the body and the indweller, the perishable and imperishable. The point is that leaving aside (not paying attention to) the perishable things, pay attention to the imperishable. By doing so, character building takes place.There is one very important point, that when the aim is of the imperishable, the perishable things will come on their own. You will not have to undergo suffering for them. But if the aim and focus is of the perishable, the imperishable essence will not be attained, and one will have to worry and make an effort for the perishable. And further ahead Lord says, that see toward one’s innate duty, therefore it is only beneficial to fight the war of righteousness for a Kshatriya. (Gita 2/31). The point is that it is only by fulfilling duty that man progresses, and by going towards non-duty he takes a fall. The main thing in fulfilling one’s duty, is to renounce desires, proprietary interest and attachment. The meaning of renouncing these is that one should not have the aim of “jada”, the inert (insentient). Previously the body etc. were not ours, later on as well, they will not remain ours and at present too they are separating from us every single moment. If this kind of alertness is awakened then the aim will not be of the inert and the senses, the inner faculties will be restrained and controlled on their own. In self-control itself is the building of character. In lack of control and lack of restraint, progress is curtailed and with that the character falls.In the beginning of the third Chapter, Arjuna asks that why are you engaging me in these most sinful acts? Lord says – though these appear to be very sinful on the surface, than too one must fulfill their duties by giving up selfishness, proprietary interest, egoism, and desires. By doing so, the dreadfulness does not remain, only the action remains. Actions can be various according to one’s varna (order of life) and ashram (stage in life), but the terribleness, the filth, the passion , all lead to one’s downfall, and it arises due to desires. Keeping desires in the forefront if one reads and shares with others the spiritual messages (with the aim of money or other things), it is considered demoniac tendency and one cannot escape sins; even on listening and sharing spiritual truths, good character cannot be developed because desire is the root of all sins (Gita 3/37). However, if the aim is God, then even though engaged in worldly duties and activities, then too good character will come in them. Therefore, in the third chapter, Lord gives great emphasis on renouncing desires and doing one’s duty. Similarly, in the fourth chapter it has been said that when there is no desires, when there is no sense of pride in doership, then all actions become inactions, in other words, even while doing karma, man is not bound; because his aim is to go towards God. In the fifth chapter also says to fulfill one’s duty -Yuktah karmaphalam tyaktvaa shanatimaanoti naishthikim |Ayuktah kaamkaarena phale sakto nibhadhyate || (Gita 5/12)“He who is a Karmayogi, who by abandoning attachment to the fruit of action, attains everlasting peace (God Realization); whereas, he who acts with a selfish motive, being attached to the fruit of actions through desire acquires bondage.” Fruits (objects) are the kind that will be born and will later perish, but the desire for them is what is binding. Desire makes one fall in character. When character takes a fall, there is lack of peace and whereas building character, one attains peace. The moment there is ill feelings in the mind, one experiences lack of peace. And the moment there is good feelings within, peace immediately follows.If you are attentive, then it is every man’s experience that the more that he renounces the perishable, that much peace, joy, equanimity, good qualities, continue to come in him and the more that he desires the perishable things, that much lack of peace, discord, anguish, burning infliction, and bad qualities arise.In the sixth chapter also, it has been said to engage in God having “That” as the aim. That God is present and pervading everywhere. He who sees Me (the Universal Self, God) present in all beings and sees all beings existing in Me (Paramatma), I am never out of sight for him, nor is he ever out of my sight.Yo maam paschyati sarvatra sarvam cha mayi pashyatiTasyaahum na pranashyaami sa cha mein na pranashyati || (Gita 6/30)That man who sees other’s sorrow and happiness as his own happiness and sorrow, he is an eternal yogi -Aatmoupamyena sarvatra samam pashyati yorjuna |Sukham va yadi vaa dukham sa yogi paramo matah || (Gita 6/32)He who has the sentiments - Let there be no sorrow such a one attains God (Paramatma tattva). How can the suffering of all come to an end? How can all be happy? One who has such sentiments - their character is the highest of all. Further when the conversation lead to bringing the mind under control, then the Lord revealed about study and practice “abhyaas” and detachment “vairaag” (Gita 6/35). In other words, there too the talks are about removing the mind from the world, and engaging it in God. When talking about progress in the life beyond this world, there too the same has been intellect is only in God, he is considered the best among the yogis (Gita 6/47). He who walks the path of God, if his spiritual practices comes to an end in the middle and he dies then too he will be benefited, he will attain misfortune (Gita 6/40). Those who do work for the welfare of all, even if their work is left incomplete, he will be benefited. He whose mind and It is only eminent to be engaged in God.He who is not devoted to God, God calls him an evil doer (Gita 7/15) and he who is devoted to God, he is called virtuous (Gita 7/16). The point is that he who walks the path towards God are called virtuous and benevolent, and he who walks the path of the world is called an evil-doer. Further ahead it is said that he whose actions are pure, whose character is great, they become unyielding in their spiritual pursuits and do worship and devotion of God (Gita 7/28).
In walking the path towards God, remembrance is the key point. In the beginning of the Eight Chapter, on questioning by Arjuna, the Lord said that he who leaves this body while remembering Me, he attains Me - of this there is no doubt. (Gita 8/5).
Because whatever the sentiments and feelings that are recollected at the time of leaving the body, that alone he attains. (Gita 8/6) Therefore God says, that keep in mind and remember Me at all times - “Sarveshu kaaleshu Maamanusmara” (Gita 8/7). Then God said something extra-ordinary that he who remembers Me at all times, for him I am easily attainable.
Anayacheta satatam yo maam smarati nityasah |
Tasyaham sulabh paarth nitya yuktasya yoginah || (Gita 8/14)
To remember God is a divine trait. It is innateness the root of good character. The meaning of being in remembrance of God is - that remembering and recollecting the innate relation that we have with God, that very relationship, is the one only real relationship. I do not have a relationship with the world. I have only assumed a relationship with the world, therefore this relationship does not last. It is clearly seen that the relationships we have in this birth, they were not there in the previous birth, and they will not be there in the next birth. In the same way this world is constantly changing, but God is the same, as Is, and I myself am also the same. Therefore my relationship with Paramatma is eternal. Remembering this itself is recollection and remembrance (smruti). Thinking can also be of the world, but “smruti” can only be of God. On having such recollection and remembrance, good character is axiomatic.
He who is inclined towards God, becomes the best of all. There is greater gains among those who walk the path of God with aim of God, than the gains that come from Vedas (holy texts), sacrifice, austerities, charity, visiting holy places, fasting etc. (Gita 8/28).
Therefore inclination towards God is considered to to be the sovereign of sciences (king of all knowledge), most mysterious, supremely holy, most excellent, directly realizable, endowed with virtues, very easy to practice and imperishable (Gita 9/2). God finds Himself to be so easy to attain, that “he who with devotion offers a leaf, a flower, a fruit, water etc. I partake in that thing., (Gita 9/26). Therefore, whatever you do, whatever you eat, whatever you offer in sacrifice (yajna), whateer you bestow as a gift, whatever you do by way of penance, dedicate it all to Me, then you will be freed from bondage of actions having good and bad results; and freed from them you yourself having completely surrendered shall attain Me (Gita 9/27 – 28).
Whether a man is evil or good – he must not worry. The main point is that that he is engaged in God. On becoming engaged in God, his bad conduct cannot last. He can very quickly become righteous and he attains eternal peace (Gita 9/30-31) . Women folks, Vaisyas, Sudras, and even those that are born of sinful wombs taking refuge in Me, attain the Supreme God. (Gita 9/32-33). However many different “jaatis” that are present, of these externally there is the separation due to nature, but from within all are a part of God. Therefore in worldly relations, the importance is of conducting one’s self according to one’s “Varna,” but in the path of spirituality, there is no importance of “varna” etc. because in the form of divinity (being a part of God), every one’s true nature is pure and all are equally entitled to God. God says, that “Fix your mind on Me, be devoted to Me, adore Me, prostrate to Me, thus making yourself steadfast in Me, and entirely surrendering to Me, you will reach Me.” (Gita 9/34). The point of all this is that only be engaged in Me.
In the tenth chapter on Arjuna’s pleading, God described His super human powers and His Universal form. The essence of what He said - “I am all pervasive in the World. Wherever you see something extra-ordinary, (glorious, brilliant, powerful), know it to be a manifestation of a spark of My splendor” (Gita 10/41). That specialty is due to Me alone. The point is that wherever whatever you find brilliant, abundant, remarkable, there too, the sight should turn towards God. There after he says “what is the reason for you to gain detailed knowledge? I stand supporting the entire Universe, with a single fragment of Myself.” (Gita 10/42) On hearing this, Arjuna, desired to see that Universal Form of the Lord, in Whose single fragment is the entire Universe. The Lord bestowed Arjuna with “divya chakshu” (special divine vision) to behold this sight. * On seeing the divine vision, Arjuna became perplexed, became filled with fear, became charmed. Then God said that this is your foolishness. I am the same One, then why are you fearful?
In the twelfth Chapter, Arjuna asked “he who worships the Imperishable and the Unmanifest and he who worships God with attributes (bhaktimarg), which of the two are better versed in yoga? (Gita 12/1). The path of the Imperishable, Unmanifest (jnana marg), are using their own effort, but in the path of “bhakti” the dependence is on only God. In the path of the Imperishable, divine attributes, discrimination and detachment etc. have to be acquired, but in the path of devotion, on taking refuge in the Lord, divine qualities, good attributes and conduct are automatically and naturally acquired (Gita 12/7). Therefore God says that “you give your mind and intellect to Me alone, there upon you will live in Me alone.” (Gita 12/8). God says - the devotee who is living in Me alone, is most dear to Me. As such, all the beings are dear to God, but he who takes refuge in God, he is most dear to God. Simply by being devoted and engrossed in God, good qualities and conduct come on its own, without any effort.
In the thirteenth Chapter, God describes the path of knowledge (of the Imperishable), and while he describes good qualities such as “absence of pride” (amaanitva) etc., he brings up “Unswerving Devotion to Me with sole dependence on Me alone” – ”Mayi chaananyayogen bhaktiravyabhichaarini” (Gita 13/10). In the Fourteenth Chapter also there is talks about devotion “bhakti” - “He who worships Me with unadulterated devotion, rises above the three modes and becomes eligible, for attaining Brahma”. (Gita 14/26). It is only due to affinity with attributes (gunas) that demonaic traits are born, due to which births in higher and lower forms take place. On walking the path of Divinity (God), one rises above the three modes.
In the fifteenth chapter God reveals His extra-ordinary glories and radiance and says that I am the Supreme Personality (Supreme Soul) over both the “Insentient” (Perishable) and “Sentient” (Imperishable Embodied Soul). (Gita 15/16-18). He who knows Me as the Supreme Personality, the Highest Person, is “sarvavid” the knower of all, and he worships Me, with all his being. (Gita 15/19). Divine traits naturally manifest in him who is devoted to Me and worships Me. Therefore in Sixteenth Chapter, God gives the description of “Divine Traits”. But, he who has become distant from God, who only wants to nourish his own body, to engage in sense enjoyments and in hoarding, demoniac tendencies manifest in him. God elaborates at great length those demoniac traits in the Sixteenth Chapter. He says, Divine traits leads to liberation, whereas Demoniac traits lead to bondage. (Gita 16/5), and such a person attains birth through 8.4 million different wombs (Gita 16/19) and goes to hell. (Gita 16/20).
In the Seventeenth Chapter, the Lord describes the three modes - of goodness (sattvic), passion (rajasic) and ignorance (tamasic). Even on seeing this, the goodness and divine sentiments are among those that have a disinclination for the world and inclination towards God. They rise above the sentiments of passion and ignorance. Thus those who perform the acts of sacrifice, penance and various acts of charity for God, then such acts are of the mode of goodness and they are liberating. (Gita 17/25). However if they are done for the world, i.e. with aim of honor, fame, pleasure, rest and relaxation etc. and sacrifices, austerities, charity etc. done with negligence and ignorance, then they become of the mode of passion and ignorance.
In the Eighteenth chapter, God elaborates in great detail, Sanyaas (Sankhyayoga) and “tyaag” (Karmayog). In the end God concludes that leave dependency of all dharmas, and only take refuge in Me.
“Sarvadharmaan parityajya maamekum sharanam vraja |
Aham tvaa sarvapaapebhyo Mokshayishyami maa suchah || (Gita 18/66)
All the work in the world, all accomplishments, all progress, all is encompassed in that one – “sharanagati” (taking refuge in the Lord”. God says that all the sins that are there, evil qualities and conduct, I will free you from these. You do not worry. By My grace, the divine traits will come naturally, on their own.
Just as a child that stays in his mother’s lap, gets provided for, is nourished, taken care of and he grows, similarly, on taking the refuge in the Lord, all the good traits and conduct will come unknowingly. Building of character will take place on its own.
In this manner, in the entire Gita if one sees then there is only one point - walking the path towards God, i.e. becoming inclined towards God. The aim of going towards the Lord is itself an aid in preventing the fall of one’s character. All evil qualities and conduct come from desire for sense pleasures and hoarding. Of this, the importance of money and dependence on it, leads to the worst downfall. By this, man’s character goes down. When character takes a fall, people talk ill of him and he is dishonored.
A man who has fallen in character, he is lower than even animal and those dwelling in hell; because animal and hellish ones are suffering the consequences of their past actions, and are moving towards human birth, but by incurring sins, a characterless man, is moving towards animal life and hell! Association of such men is the kind that will lead to downfall. Therefore it is said -
Baru bhal baas narak kar taataa |
Dusht sang jani deyi bidhaataa || (Manas 5/46/4)
Therefore for improving your character, become inclined towards God, that is – I am God’s and God is mine. I am not this world’s, the world is not mine.
The mistake that man makes is that which is not his, those thing that belong to the world, he considers them as his own, and that which is actually his, i.e. God, he does not accept as his own. As such, if it is seen, the things of the world are his only for proper use. But for himself, God is his very own. Because the things belong to the world, therefore they have to be offered to the world for serving and man himself is God’s, therefore he must surrender himself to God. Neither he has to take anything from the world, nor does he have anything to take from God. If something is to be taken, then let that be God Himself.
By desiring things of the world, one establishes a relationship with the world. Desire arises from attachment, i.e. desire arises by considering the body, wife, son, wealth, etc. as mine. Now if we think and accept the body, wife, son, wealth etc. as our own, can we say we have an independent right over them? Can we keep them as long as we like? Can we stay with them forever? If the answer is No! Than what is the difficulty in getting rid of the sense of mine-ness? By leaving the erroneously accepted sense of mine, desires will not arise. When desires do not arise, automatically there will be a feeling of mine-ness with God; because God is eternally ours from time immemorial and God is ever-attained. On having sense of mine-ness with God, feelings and conduct will be purified.
Body, wife, son, wealth, house, various possessions, are they real or unreal – this doubt may arise, but our relationship with them is unreal, of this there is no possibility of doubt at all. On knowing the unreal as unreal, the unreal relation is renounced very easily and on becoming inclined towards God, the eternal relationship with God is automatically awakened. Thereafter good character and conduct comes on its own and man becomes a role-model of good character, in other words, his character becomes one that is worthy of respect.
Yadyadaacharati shreshthasttdevetaro janah |
Sa yatpramaanam kurute lokastdanuvartate ||
Whatever an ideal person does, he is followed by others, as well. Whatever standard he sets, the world follows the same.”
A person of good character is never dependent. An ideal person is entirely independent, capable, eligible and entitled.
Narayana ! Narayana !! Narayana !!!
From "Kalyaan Path" in Hindi by Swami Ramsukhdasji
When you're not good enough...
When you're not good enough people tend to brush you off. They take you for granted and think of you as weak. When you're not good enough you are like the ugly duckling. No one seems to care that you can't keep up and just continue on without you. Leaving you lost and alone. If I was good enough he wouldn't stay up till 3am, isolating himself in the living room. If I was good enough, he wouldn't let me feel so low about myself. If I was good enough...the question is when will i be good enough? Will I be good enough if I lose weight? Will I be good enough if I start doing my hair and makeup? Will I be good enough if I just erase all my emotions? That's the big question...when will I be good enough. The feeling of not being good enough is not just from inside. You see that feeling is a weed inside your heart and the more people use and abuse you, the more it grows. So I don't feel like I'm good enough most of my days. No one, not even him seems to understand that its the little things that kill me. Its constant anxiety, the insecurities that eat me up inside. Don't you think someone would try to raise me up, lift my spirits...take a weed killer to this I'm not good enough within? No...not even him. You see me and him are like room mates. Because we don't act like an item, we don't treat each other like we are together. Bending over backwards for him because I don't feel good enough. Maybe today will be different, maybe today i will be good enough. But its never enough. I'm always in the wrong, the one who is making the mistakes. I'm just not good enough.