tags

Latest open relationship facebook Image and Videos

Find the latest Image and Videos about open relationship facebook from top creators only on Nojoto App. Also find trending photos & videos.

  • Latest Stories

"VICTIM OF RAPE.. I don’t know how I managed to, I just knew that I was able to find my way home after fighting against his tight grip. I really can’t explain how devastated I am right now. My fiancé suddenly became a beast just because I didn’t permit him to have sex with me. It's not the first time I am experiencing this but the difference is, I got away this time. I thought ken was different. He is a Christian. He speaks in tongues. In fact, he is the youth pastor of his Church—so respected and admired. Why is all this happening to me, am I cursed? What ken did to me this evening brought back the memory of the incident that took place five years ago in my room when I was on campus. It was not really my fault because I wasn't aware of his plans in the first place. It was like the usual visit to my place after examination, before the end of the semester. I was happy to see him as usual. We were in a relationship, though he wasn't the Church type but he is a good guy and caring at that. My boyfriend came visiting and I made him comfortable in my abode by preparing his favourite meal and made him feel at home. The sun began to say farewell to daylight and the twinkle twinkle little stars took over the mantle from day and stood in the gap for itself. My roommate had gone for vigil as the semester was over. He had never slept in my place before, neither have I in his place even though he stays alone. I was surprised because it's past 8 and he wasn't making plans of leaving anytime soon. As if reading my mind, he said he won't be leaving as he planned to spend the night with me before going home and moreover, he knows my roommate had gone for vigil. I didn't want to argue. I adjusted the bedspread in the room and I made sure the door was properly locked, then we went to bed together. And in the middle of the night, I felt a movement on my body. I thought it was cockroach but I knew it wasn't somehow, then he spoke in the dark, "Baby I want to feel you a little, maybe it will help me sleep as I'm finding it difficult to sleep." When did I turn to lullaby? I said in my mind. Still struggling to open my mouth and say the word "NO, PLEASE" became a problem for me. While still contemplating how to turn him down without upsetting him, the pleasure I was getting wouldn't allow me. Many thoughts ran through my small mind and I finally said NO... NO... NO... DON'T. But my plea fell on deaf ears. I got up and turned on the light and behold the TONY I saw was not the guy I knew and loved. He was so strange and different. Before I knew what was going on my clothes and body were separated. Until today, I can't explain how that magic happened within seconds. "Please don't", was the song I sang till my roommate came back in the morning. I ended everything with him and I hated him from that day onward. Or is it when I visited my friend from the fellowship and how I was raped in his room, I wished I died that day. The looks on his friend's face and neighbors, I picked my shattered self and walked head down to my room. Or when I went to a remote village for service and the accommodation I was able to get because I was new to the area, how thieves visited that day and raped all the ladies there, of course I was not excluded. I sometimes asked myself how can one person, I mean one small lady, have 3 rape cases in her life time from different men—beasts I mean. I intentionally stayed away from men, anything men at all for four years. Ken changed everything. I mean, he was an angel sent to wipe my sorrow and pains away, at least so I thought. The testimony from his congregation about him gave me no doubt that he was the one. TONY blamed me for what he did to me, he blamed me for raping me, imagine that!! For years I was with the guilt that I caused the rape, but I realized it wasn't my fault in any way. Ken taught on rape on one of the days I went to church. Yes, I realized I had forgotten God and had to go back to Him. My life was empty, full of bitterness and pain. I needed to be free at least, I want to drop the heavy loads I was carrying daily. It was so obvious that something was missing in my life, something no man can give. I resumed going to Church and studying the word. I was invited to ken's Church and l liked the atmosphere and decided to stay, I decided to pitch my tent there. That was when the announcement of their youth programme was made, I gave it a thought to attend. After hearing the word from the mouth of an handsome preacher like Ken, I was broken and I rededicated my life to God. We became friends and finally got into a relationship. I finally thought THIS IS IT. I was happy, he was happy too and everything was just fine. I thought he was different because he talked about marriage, the very first guy to tell me he wants to get married to me. WHY? WHY?? WHY??? All men are after sex! I screamed at myself many times in the bathroom. Sleep had lost its place in me that day, so I decided to surf my phone. In the process, I saw a post on Facebook about rape by Louisa Ene Winnie and thought to read through. I then decided to tell my friend about my ordeals. I decided to share my story to let someone know how I have been feeling. Gift was my roommate from year one until we graduated. She was devoted and humble. I have always admired her—everything about her—but I felt since we were both Christians there is nothing special about her. Notwithstanding, deep down I knew she was a better Christian than I am and a true one at that. Fortunately for me, we attend the same Church but she is married with two kids and I try to avoid her most times in Church for no particular reason if you ask me or maybe am not being truthful to myself. I know she somehow knew about me and pastor Ken (as he is fondly called by members). I phoned her the next day and after exchanging pleasantries I told her I wanted to see her and it was very urgent. Gift is so caring that she agreed to see me that day and we fixed a venue for our meeting, of course my place. Immediately I saw my friend I couldn't hold back the tears, as I cried on her soft shoulders. After some minutes of silence she said pastor Ken told her what happened and he is asking for my forgiveness. I wasn't surprised because I once introduced him to Gift as my roommate and friend in school. But I didn't think he would tell her what he did to me, oh sorry, what he wanted to do to me. She told me the same guy who attempted to rape me reported to her that I no longer answer his calls nor respond to his messages. “He must have lost his mind. What is he thinking?" I said and immediately narrated my side of the story to Gift. She just smirked after my long narration. “Gift, what’s all this? I expected you to scream and thank God for me but you are smiling instead. Don’t tell me you are for him or is it because he is a pastor?" “Hey! Calm down” Gift said still smiling. "Do you know enough about this guy before going into a relationship with him?" She asked me. "Off course. I know his family members and a lot about his background. Besides the testimonies I heard about him gave me convictions that he is the one for me. He is a Pastor, he preaches so well and speaks in tongues." "Babe, that’s not what I mean. Forget his family and his positions now. What do you know about his values? The person he is?" “Eeeemmm….. he is a Christian, a Pastor.” "Forget all that for now!" Gift replied almost immediately. "I would be realistic with you, Cherish. I do not blame your ex boyfriends if not you. How could you be so insensitive that you are making the same mistake again?" "Gift tell me what you know, I want to be married like you and have a family." "Cherish, in choosing a partner, if your values are not known and considered then you are planting banana peels on your way because the relationship might never result in marriage and even if it does the marriage have high chances of being faulty. You know why? Value systems is key to building solid relationships." "This is why friendship should be the foundation of every boy and girl relationship. It is during the friendship stage that you get to discover his or her values like, his stand on purity, his goals, his priorities and many more and whether they align with yours or not. Then you get to know if he or she is someone you can go into a relationship with. Relationship is by choice just like friendship not by force or by pressure." “Gift, how do I know someone’s values? After all I am not a witch.” "You ask questions dear. You need to ask questions concerning what you want to know. You don’t keep mute and be assuming that since he says he is a Christian or a Pastor and he goes to church he is for sexual purity. It doesn’t work that way." "Pastors are humans too, though expectations are much of them but remember they are humans and thus not excluded from mistakes. They are men and women with blood flowing in their veins." "You could ask like this, what is your view about sexual abstinence until marriage? What are your priorities? I won't dispute the fact that every guy irrespective of who they are and what office they occupy wants just one thing in a relationship. Which is SEX, SEX and SEX! Yes. I can say that again and again. They want it now, soon or later after marriage. What depicts their values is when they want it. It is now your choice to choose the one you want among them. That is why questioning is very vital before accepting a relationship and during the relationship before marriage is finally considered. The habit of not asking questions has brought marriages to an end. Ask questions. It will save you from unnecessary heartbreaks, like this. Thank God you were able to escape. Another thing you should know, you shouldn't be visiting him alone especially in his house, except family house, and ensure people are around when you're together. If you must go alone make sure it is an open place like eateries or gardens, places where people are. Leave no room for temptation at all. In all I have said forgive him but mind you the decision is still yours to make, I won't tell you to go back to him or not, with all I have said make your conclusion. Of course, ask the Holy Spirit to help you. Mind you, If your relationship with God is not solid, your relationship with the man will fail. Let no one tell you otherwise, Sex isn't part of a relationship personal terms and agreement. It is part of marriage covenant." I wanted telling her about the other two rape cases that happened to me but I think I know what to do now, heal properly with the help of the Holy Spirit, forgive my offenders including Ken and solidify my relationship with God. Enough of keeping to myself, it's time to grow and glow with God's children. I saw lots of impactful articles on Winnie Ene Louisa's timeline for singles, it's time to read them up and learn. Of course I'm not going back to ken but I must forgive him and move on. Thanks so much Gift, I wish I had spoken to you long time ago just maybe things wouldn't be like this, but I'm glad to know now. We are so many, Cherish, out there dying in silent pain. Some have been so consumed with self guilt that suicide was their only escape. Some blame their self for crimes that wasn't their fault that low self-esteem is now their name. Jesus is the solution to all situation. I'm Winnie making impact. I say NO to rape. I say NO to suicide. Yes to freedom in Christ. I help singles lead godly healthy relationship. I Write, Speak and Advocate. ©Winnie Ene Louisa"

VICTIM OF RAPE..

I don’t know how I managed to, I just knew that I was able to find my way home after fighting against his tight grip. I really can’t explain how devastated I am right now. My fiancé  suddenly became a beast just because I didn’t permit him to have sex with me.

It's not the first time I am experiencing this but the difference is, I got away this time. I thought ken was different. He is a Christian. He speaks in tongues. In fact, he is the youth pastor of his Church—so respected and admired.

Why is all this happening to me, am I cursed? 

What ken did to me this evening brought back the memory of the incident that took place five years ago in my room when I was on campus.

It was not really my fault because I wasn't aware of his plans in the first place. It was like the usual visit to my place after examination, before the end of the semester. I was happy to see him as usual. We were in a relationship, though he wasn't the Church type but he is a good guy and caring at that.

My boyfriend came visiting and I made him comfortable in my abode by preparing his favourite meal and made him feel at home.

The sun began to say farewell to daylight and the twinkle twinkle little stars took over the mantle from day and stood in the gap for itself.

My roommate had gone for vigil as the semester was over. He had never slept in my place before, neither have I in his place even though he stays alone. I was surprised because it's past 8 and he wasn't making plans of leaving anytime soon.

As if reading my mind, he said he won't be leaving as he planned to spend the night with me before going home and moreover, he knows my roommate had gone for vigil. I didn't want to argue.

I adjusted the bedspread in the room and I made sure the door was properly locked, then we went to bed together.

And in the middle of the night, I felt a movement on my body. I thought it was cockroach but I knew it wasn't somehow, then he spoke in the dark, "Baby I want to feel you a little, maybe it will help me sleep as I'm finding it difficult to sleep." When did I turn to lullaby? I said in my mind.

Still struggling to open my mouth and say the word "NO, PLEASE" became a problem for me. While still contemplating how to turn him down without upsetting him, the pleasure I was getting wouldn't allow me. Many thoughts ran through my small mind and I finally said NO... NO... NO... DON'T.

But my plea fell on deaf ears. I got up and turned on the light and behold the TONY I saw was not the guy I knew and loved. He was so strange and different. 

Before I knew what was going on my clothes and body were separated. Until today, I can't explain how that magic happened within seconds. "Please don't", was the song I sang till my roommate came back in the morning.

I ended everything with him and I hated him from that day onward.

Or is it when I visited my friend from the fellowship and how I was raped in his room, I wished I died that day. The looks on his friend's face and neighbors, I picked my shattered self and walked head down to my room.

Or when I went to a remote village for service and the accommodation I was able to get because I was new to the area, how thieves visited that day and raped all the ladies there, of course I was not excluded.

I sometimes asked myself how can one person, I mean one small lady, have 3 rape cases in her life time from different men—beasts I mean.

I intentionally stayed away from men, anything men at all for four years.

Ken changed everything. I mean, he was an angel sent to wipe my sorrow and pains away, at least so I thought.

The testimony from his congregation about him gave me no doubt that he was the one.

TONY blamed me for what he did to me, he blamed me for raping me, imagine that!! For years I was with the guilt that I caused the rape, but I realized it wasn't my fault in any way. 

Ken taught on rape on one of the days I went to church. Yes, I realized I had forgotten God and had to go back to Him. My life was empty, full of bitterness and pain. I needed to be free at least, I want to drop the heavy loads I was carrying daily. 

It was so obvious that something was missing in my life, something no man can give. I resumed going to Church and studying the word.

I was invited to ken's Church and l liked the atmosphere and decided to stay, I decided to pitch my tent there. That was when the announcement of their youth programme was made, I gave it a thought to attend.

After hearing the word from the mouth of an handsome preacher like Ken, I was broken and I rededicated my life to God.

We became friends and finally got into a relationship. I finally thought THIS IS IT. 

I was happy, he was happy too and everything was just fine. I thought he was different because he talked about marriage, the very first guy to tell me he wants to get married to me.

WHY?                 WHY??                 WHY???

All men are after sex! I screamed at myself many times in the bathroom.

Sleep had lost its place in me that day, so I decided to surf my phone.

In the process, I saw a post on Facebook about rape by Louisa Ene Winnie and thought to read through. I then decided to tell my friend about my ordeals. I decided to share my story to let someone know how I have been feeling.

Gift was my roommate from year one until we graduated. She was devoted and humble. I have always admired her—everything about her—but I felt since we were both Christians there is nothing special about her. Notwithstanding, deep down I knew she was a better Christian than I am and a true one at that.

Fortunately for me, we attend the same Church but she is married with two kids and I try to avoid her most times in Church for no particular reason if you ask me or maybe am not being truthful to myself.

I know she somehow knew about me and pastor Ken (as he is fondly called by members).

I phoned her the next day and after exchanging pleasantries I told her I wanted to see her and it was very urgent.

Gift is so caring that she agreed to see me that day and we fixed a venue for our meeting, of course my place.

Immediately I saw my friend I couldn't hold back the tears, as I cried on her soft shoulders.

After some minutes of silence she said pastor Ken told her what happened and he is asking for my forgiveness.

I wasn't surprised because I once introduced him to Gift as my roommate and friend in school. But I didn't think he would tell her what he did to me, oh sorry, what he wanted to do to me.

She told me the same guy who attempted to rape me reported to her that I no longer answer his calls nor respond to his messages. “He must have lost his mind. What is he thinking?" I said and immediately narrated my side of the story to Gift. She just smirked after my long narration. 

“Gift, what’s all this? I expected you to scream and thank God for me but you are smiling instead. Don’t tell me you are for him or is it because he is a pastor?"

“Hey! Calm down” Gift said still smiling. "Do you know enough about this guy before going into a relationship with him?" She asked me. "Off course. I know his family members and a lot about his background. Besides the testimonies I heard about him gave me convictions that he is the one for me. He is a Pastor, he preaches so well and speaks in tongues."

"Babe, that’s not what I mean. Forget his family and his positions now. What do you know about his values? The person he is?"

“Eeeemmm….. he is a Christian, a Pastor.” "Forget all that for now!" Gift replied almost immediately. "I would be realistic with you, Cherish. I do not blame your ex boyfriends if not you. How could you be so insensitive that you are making the same mistake again?" 

"Gift tell me what you know, I want to be married like you and have a family."

"Cherish, in choosing a partner, if your values are not known and considered then you are planting banana peels on your way because the relationship might never result in marriage and even if it does the marriage have high chances of being faulty. You know why? Value systems is key to building solid relationships."

"This is why friendship should be the foundation of every boy and girl relationship. It is during the friendship stage that you get to discover his or her values like, his stand on purity, his goals, his priorities and many more and whether they align with yours or not. Then you get to know if he or she is someone you can go into a relationship with. Relationship is by choice just like friendship not by force or by pressure."

“Gift, how do I know someone’s values? After all I am not a witch.” "You ask questions dear. You need to ask questions concerning what you want to know. You don’t keep mute and be assuming that since he says he is a Christian or a Pastor and he goes to church he is for sexual purity. It doesn’t work that way."

"Pastors are humans too, though expectations are much of them but remember they are humans and thus not excluded from mistakes. They are men and women with blood flowing in their veins."

"You could ask like this, what is your view about sexual abstinence until marriage? What are your priorities?

I won't dispute the fact that every guy irrespective of who they are and what office they occupy wants just one thing in a relationship. Which is SEX, SEX and SEX!  Yes. I can say that again and again. They want it now, soon or later after marriage. What depicts their values is when they want it. 

It is now your choice to choose the one you want among them. That is why questioning is very vital before accepting a relationship and during the relationship before marriage is finally considered.

The habit of not asking questions has brought marriages to an end. Ask questions. It will save you from unnecessary heartbreaks, like this. Thank God you were able to escape. 

Another thing you should know, you shouldn't be visiting him alone especially in his house, except family house, and ensure people are around when you're together. If you must go alone make sure it is an open place like eateries or gardens, places where people are. Leave no room for temptation at all.

In all I have said forgive him but mind you the decision is still yours to make, I won't tell you to go back to him or not, with all I have said make your conclusion. Of course, ask the Holy Spirit to help you. Mind you, If your relationship with God is not solid, your relationship with the man will fail. 

Let no one tell you otherwise, Sex isn't part of a relationship personal terms and agreement. It is part of marriage covenant."

I wanted telling her about the other two rape cases that happened to me but I think I know what to do now, heal properly with the help of the Holy Spirit, forgive my offenders including Ken and solidify my relationship with God. 

Enough of keeping to myself, it's time to grow and glow with God's children. I saw lots of impactful articles on Winnie Ene Louisa's timeline for singles, it's time to read them up and learn.

Of course I'm not going back to ken but I must forgive him and move on.

Thanks so much Gift, I wish I had spoken to you long time ago just maybe things wouldn't be like this, but I'm glad to know now.

We are so many, Cherish, out there dying in silent pain. Some have been so consumed with self guilt that suicide was their only escape. 

Some blame their self for crimes that wasn't their fault that low self-esteem is now their name.

Jesus is the solution to all situation.

I'm Winnie making impact.

I say NO to rape.

I say NO to suicide.

Yes to freedom in  Christ.

I help singles lead godly healthy relationship.

I Write, Speak and Advocate.

©Winnie Ene Louisa

#Saynotorape
#saynotosexualabuse
#saynotosuicide

23 Love
2 Share

VICTIM OF RAPE..

I don’t know how I managed to, I just knew that I was able to find my way home after fighting against his tight grip. I really can’t explain how devastated I am right now. My fiancé suddenly became a beast just because I didn’t permit him to have sex with me.

It's not the first time I am experiencing this but the difference is, I got away this time. I thought ken was different. He is a Christian. He speaks in tongues. In fact, he is the youth pastor of his Church—so respected and admired.

Why is all this happening to me, am I cursed?

What ken did to me this evening brought back the memory of the incident that took place five years ago in my room when I was on campus.

It was not really my fault because I wasn't aware of his plans in the first place. It was like the usual visit to my place after examination, before the end of the semester. I was happy to see him as usual. We were in a relationship, though he wasn't the Church type but he is a good guy and caring at that.

My boyfriend came visiting and I made him comfortable in my abode by preparing his favourite meal and made him feel at home.

The sun began to say farewell to daylight and the twinkle twinkle little stars took over the mantle from day and stood in the gap for itself.

My roommate had gone for vigil as the semester was over. He had never slept in my place before, neither have I in his place even though he stays alone. I was surprised because it's past 8 and he wasn't making plans of leaving anytime soon.

As if reading my mind, he said he won't be leaving as he planned to spend the night with me before going home and moreover, he knows my roommate had gone for vigil. I didn't want to argue.

I adjusted the bedspread in the room and I made sure the door was properly locked, then we went to bed together.

And in the middle of the night, I felt a movement on my body. I thought it was cockroach but I knew it wasn't somehow, then he spoke in the dark, "Baby I want to feel you a little, maybe it will help me sleep as I'm finding it difficult to sleep." When did I turn to lullaby? I said in my mind.

Still struggling to open my mouth and say the word "NO, PLEASE" became a problem for me. While still contemplating how to turn him down without upsetting him, the pleasure I was getting wouldn't allow me. Many thoughts ran through my small mind and I finally said NO... NO... NO... DON'T.

But my plea fell on deaf ears. I got up and turned on the light and behold the TONY I saw was not the guy I knew and loved. He was so strange and different.

Before I knew what was going on my clothes and body were separated. Until today, I can't explain how that magic happened within seconds. "Please don't", was the song I sang till my roommate came back in the morning.

I ended everything with him and I hated him from that day onward.

Or is it when I visited my friend from the fellowship and how I was raped in his room, I wished I died that day. The looks on his friend's face and neighbors, I picked my shattered self and walked head down to my room.

Or when I went to a remote village for service and the accommodation I was able to get because I was new to the area, how thieves visited that day and raped all the ladies there, of course I was not excluded.

I sometimes asked myself how can one person, I mean one small lady, have 3 rape cases in her life time from different men—beasts I mean.

I intentionally stayed away from men, anything men at all for four years.

Ken changed everything. I mean, he was an angel sent to wipe my sorrow and pains away, at least so I thought.

The testimony from his congregation about him gave me no doubt that he was the one.

TONY blamed me for what he did to me, he blamed me for raping me, imagine that!! For years I was with the guilt that I caused the rape, but I realized it wasn't my fault in any way.

Ken taught on rape on one of the days I went to church. Yes, I realized I had forgotten God and had to go back to Him. My life was empty, full of bitterness and pain. I needed to be free at least, I want to drop the heavy loads I was carrying daily.

It was so obvious that something was missing in my life, something no man can give. I resumed going to Church and studying the word.

I was invited to ken's Church and l liked the atmosphere and decided to stay, I decided to pitch my tent there. That was when the announcement of their youth programme was made, I gave it a thought to attend.

After hearing the word from the mouth of an handsome preacher like Ken, I was broken and I rededicated my life to God.

We became friends and finally got into a relationship. I finally thought THIS IS IT.

I was happy, he was happy too and everything was just fine. I thought he was different because he talked about marriage, the very first guy to tell me he wants to get married to me.

WHY? WHY?? WHY???

All men are after sex! I screamed at myself many times in the bathroom.

Sleep had lost its place in me that day, so I decided to surf my phone.

In the process, I saw a post on Facebook about rape by Louisa Ene Winnie and thought to read through. I then decided to tell my friend about my ordeals. I decided to share my story to let someone know how I have been feeling.

Gift was my roommate from year one until we graduated. She was devoted and humble. I have always admired her—everything about her—but I felt since we were both Christians there is nothing special about her. Notwithstanding, deep down I knew she was a better Christian than I am and a true one at that.

Fortunately for me, we attend the same Church but she is married with two kids and I try to avoid her most times in Church for no particular reason if you ask me or maybe am not being truthful to myself.

I know she somehow knew about me and pastor Ken (as he is fondly called by members).

I phoned her the next day and after exchanging pleasantries I told her I wanted to see her and it was very urgent.

Gift is so caring that she agreed to see me that day and we fixed a venue for our meeting, of course my place.

Immediately I saw my friend I couldn't hold back the tears, as I cried on her soft shoulders.

After some minutes of silence she said pastor Ken told her what happened and he is asking for my forgiveness.

I wasn't surprised because I once introduced him to Gift as my roommate and friend in school. But I didn't think he would tell her what he did to me, oh sorry, what he wanted to do to me.

She told me the same guy who attempted to rape me reported to her that I no longer answer his calls nor respond to his messages. “He must have lost his mind. What is he thinking?" I said and immediately narrated my side of the story to Gift. She just smirked after my long narration.

“Gift, what’s all this? I expected you to scream and thank God for me but you are smiling instead. Don’t tell me you are for him or is it because he is a pastor?"

“Hey! Calm down” Gift said still smiling. "Do you know enough about this guy before going into a relationship with him?" She asked me. "Off course. I know his family members and a lot about his background. Besides the testimonies I heard about him gave me convictions that he is the one for me. He is a Pastor, he preaches so well and speaks in tongues."

"Babe, that’s not what I mean. Forget his family and his positions now. What do you know about his values? The person he is?"

“Eeeemmm….. he is a Christian, a Pastor.” "Forget all that for now!" Gift replied almost immediately. "I would be realistic with you, Cherish. I do not blame your ex boyfriends if not you. How could you be so insensitive that you are making the same mistake again?"

"Gift tell me what you know, I want to be married like you and have a family."

"Cherish, in choosing a partner, if your values are not known and considered then you are planting banana peels on your way because the relationship might never result in marriage and even if it does the marriage have high chances of being faulty. You know why? Value systems is key to building solid relationships."

"This is why friendship should be the foundation of every boy and girl relationship. It is during the friendship stage that you get to discover his or her values like, his stand on purity, his goals, his priorities and many more and whether they align with yours or not. Then you get to know if he or she is someone you can go into a relationship with. Relationship is by choice just like friendship not by force or by pressure."

“Gift, how do I know someone’s values? After all I am not a witch.” "You ask questions dear. You need to ask questions concerning what you want to know. You don’t keep mute and be assuming that since he says he is a Christian or a Pastor and he goes to church he is for sexual purity. It doesn’t work that way."

"Pastors are humans too, though expectations are much of them but remember they are humans and thus not excluded from mistakes. They are men and women with blood flowing in their veins."

"You could ask like this, what is your view about sexual abstinence until marriage? What are your priorities?

I won't dispute the fact that every guy irrespective of who they are and what office they occupy wants just one thing in a relationship. Which is SEX, SEX and SEX! Yes. I can say that again and again. They want it now, soon or later after marriage. What depicts their values is when they want it.

It is now your choice to choose the one you want among them. That is why questioning is very vital before accepting a relationship and during the relationship before marriage is finally considered.

The habit of not asking questions has brought marriages to an end. Ask questions. It will save you from unnecessary heartbreaks, like this. Thank God you were able to escape.

Another thing you should know, you shouldn't be visiting him alone especially in his house, except family house, and ensure people are around when you're together. If you must go alone make sure it is an open place like eateries or gardens, places where people are. Leave no room for temptation at all.

In all I have said forgive him but mind you the decision is still yours to make, I won't tell you to go back to him or not, with all I have said make your conclusion. Of course, ask the Holy Spirit to help you. Mind you, If your relationship with God is not solid, your relationship with the man will fail.

Let no one tell you otherwise, Sex isn't part of a relationship personal terms and agreement. It is part of marriage covenant."

I wanted telling her about the other two rape cases that happened to me but I think I know what to do now, heal properly with the help of the Holy Spirit, forgive my offenders including Ken and solidify my relationship with God.

Enough of keeping to myself, it's time to grow and glow with God's children. I saw lots of impactful articles on Winnie Ene Louisa's timeline for singles, it's time to read them up and learn.

Of course I'm not going back to ken but I must forgive him and move on.

Thanks so much Gift, I wish I had spoken to you long time ago just maybe things wouldn't be like this, but I'm glad to know now.

We are so many, Cherish, out there dying in silent pain. Some have been so consumed with self guilt that suicide was their only escape.

Some blame their self for crimes that wasn't their fault that low self-esteem is now their name.

Jesus is the solution to all situation.

I'm Winnie making impact.

I say NO to rape.

I say NO to suicide.

Yes to freedom in Christ.

I help singles lead godly healthy relationship.

I Write, Speak and Advocate.

©Winnie Ene Louisa

4 Love

Let's hear a story then :D
It will be in DC universe. I will name this story- Superman: The Rise Of Indian Sun God
Okay, this is Earth 21 where Superman doesn't exist, atleast not yet :D
Let me start from the beginning. God wave is a cosmic force that came out of source wall to create new Gods and in the process creating other worldly God like Sun God Rao who later created earth and so many others planets in the universe and also was responsible for creating many Superheroes (meta humans) through out universe including earth.
Krypton was one of those Planet. Kryptonians at the beginning of their civilization were aware of Rao's presence but with times they forgot as Rao was disappeared from krypton. Noone knew Rao's presence or where would he be disappeared? As the time progress, Krypton became technologically superior planet in the universe. They soon thought Rao as another mythological superstition.
CC Batson and Marlyn Batson(incase you don't know they are parents of yet to born Shazam aka Captain Marvel aka Billy Batson) were world famous archeologist from America.
They came to India to research on old Konark's Temple in Orissa
They found a lot of wall drawings were similar to Australian aboriginal people's cave drawings about Sun God.
It was this mystery that got them hooked into this.
They were using some kind of radiation meter on the temple's wall. They were facinated to find out that it was giving same kind of radiation signal as it did in that Australian cave. But the difference was that in this case radiation levels were higher as if to say some kind of power source was inside the temple or under it.
Suddenly, an Indian police came running angrily and took their equipment from their hand and threw it away shouting, "Not permitted, not permitted"
CC said to him, "You aren't understanding, there's some of kind of power source under this temple....."
Indian Police said again, "Not permitted, go to the authority"
That equipment had electro magnetic system inside and as it clashed with temple's wall, it burst with strong electromagnetic waves of current.
It shook the ground.
The whole temple was shaking.
Suddenly, a bright light flew away towards sky by shaking everything.
It almost crashed into the sky and opened a portal or warm whole to a completely different part of universe, it came to planet Krypton and destroyed it's core and went inside the baby son of Jor El, the chief of science in krypton.
Jor El was shocked by this whole incident but was even more shocked looking the fact that Kal El was completely alright.
Suddenly, alarm bells were ringing.
Jor El found out that krypton was about to be destroyed.
Suddenly, he found out about the opened portal to another part of universe and also a blue planet, he sent an android robot to find out more.
In the meantime, everyone in krypton was looking for an way out but almost all the mother ship was destroyed.
One ship was remained which was owned by Jor El.
After getting all the necessary information about this blue planet called Earth, Jor El was preparing for departure with his wife and baby son but caught by other kryptonians.
But that mothership was limited, it couldn't take all the kryptonians so there was a huge battle between them, realising the eventual destruction of this mothership, Jor El send Kal El by small spaceship to earth as he knew Kal El would be able to survive in earth atmosphere infact he will be superior to local earth people because of their yellow solar system.
In earth-
There was a small-town named Satyavila outside the metropolitan city Kolkata.
A couple (Jonardon Sen and Mitali Sen) was doing a picnic in jungle area outside locality as it was romantic. They were childless so they were very romantic to each other to fill the gap in their relationship.
Suddenly, they saw a bright light came from the sky and crashed into the jungle destroying a number of threes in the jungle.
Both of them went there to see what was going on and they saw a boy child was smiling towards them holding a huge tree easily overhead!!!!
They said to each other, "Oh! My God, that's not human!!!"
But looking at the innocent smile on that boy's face they decided to bring him their home while hiding his little spaceship in a nearby cave in that jungle.
They decided to bring him up as their own.
He was named Arkya Sen. Arkya realised when he was growing up that he wasn't like other teenagers. He had abnormal strength, speed, durability and so many other ability.
But Arkya never wanted to have any powers, infact he used to be scared so that no-one could find out that he was freak
So he put in that extra bit of effort not to look anything but a human and simultaneously avoided using any of his powers and he got used to that and almost pretend to forget that he had this unnatural abilities.
Arkya just wanted a normal life.
He used to go to school and had fun with his friends, played Cricket with his friends and liked a girl who just moved in next door with her family.
She was two years older than Arkya and adult 18 years old. And she already had a boyfriend. Her name was Sana Ang, a North East Indian.
Pritam Roy was the best friend of Arkya and both of them used to spend a lot of time together. Pritam didn't know about his best friend's secret though as Jonardon asked Arkya not to disclose his identity to anyone expecting public panic.
One day-
Pritam said to Arkya, ", Come on man, you are aiming for too high, she is way out of your league plus she is senior and already has a boyfriend"
Arkya said, "I know but I can't help it man, I am thinking about her all the time"
Suddenly Mitali asked Arkya to go to Sana's house to welcome them with some sweets.
Pritam said to Arkya with a canny smile, "Ha, ha, as if you were not looking for any opportunities to go there!"
Both of them went there and knocked on the door and door opened and they saw a smiling Sana opened the door while talking on her tablet.
Arkya quickly said, "My mother is welcoming you and your family to our neighborhood and this is some sweets"
Sana just smiled at them and asked them to come in and then called her mother and went to her room.
Both Arkya and Pritam were bored talking to Sana's mom.
Later Pritam said, "She didn't even look at us, man, she was busy talking in her phone, probably with that guy she was going out, you have got no chance"
Arkya said, "I know, we are just two kids to her so no wonder she won't even look at us, okay, I will try to forget about her"
In few months later-
There was a huge storm in Satyavila.
Sana's house was damaged because of that.
Arkya said to Jonardon, "Dad, I can help them"
Jonardon said, "Okay, do whatever you can do but be very careful, remember noone should see you"
Suddenly, Sana's mom and Sana saw a blur came and before they realised what was going on, they saw themselves in Sen house.
Sana and her mom was shocked and asked to them, "What's going on?"
Both Jonardon and Mitali said to them that their house was damaged and they were unconscious because of some kind of accident related to this disaster so they brought them their home, they just woke up.
Sana and Sana's mom found this unbelievable but could not find any other explanation either so they kind of reluctantly accepted this
Arkya was smiling.
This was the first time, Sana actually noticed Arkya.
She said, "Hi! You are so cute, Arkya is your name, isn't it?"
Arkya shook his head affirmatively
They talked for a while and had fun.
As the time was progressing Arkya was discovering his kryptonian abilities one by one, he even went to that jungle to that hidden space ship to find out more about his origin but couldn't find much unfortunately.
One day Arkya decided to experiment with his powers by going to the house roof but he instead saw Sana was crying in their house roof.
Arkya asked her what happened
Sana said that she just broke up with her boyfriend.
Even though he liked that news but instead put on sad face and decided to console her.
They were spending more time together from here on.
One day Sana asked to Arkya directly, "Do you have a crush on me?"
Arkya decided to tell her everything
Sana was shocked hearing this and she said with a nice smile, "From the first day!!! I am flattered but you are just 16 years old and I am two years older than you!! And I never saw you anything more than that, I am very sorry, Arkya, but let's be true friend first"
Arkya thought to himself, "Damn, friend-zoned!!! But hey, what else was possible!??!"
One day, when Arkya was in his space ship, he saw a signal in his space ship's interface that was coming from North pole
He used his superspeed and quickly ran towards North pole and reached there after a while.
He saw another huge mothership crashed there.
It was that Android mothership which was sent by Jor El to investigate on Earth
In there, Arkya first time learnt about his kryptonian origin and everything else that associated with it.
He found a kryptonian attire.
He realised that it was different from any earth cloth as wearing it didn't feel like it could burn out when he was running in superspeed.
He tested that theory and proved right.
A few years later-
One day the whole Sen family went to the vacation in Orissa.
Konark's temple was on their bucket list as tourist spot.
When Arkya entered the temple, he suddenly realised something different about him, as every part of his body was charged up.
He didn't stay there for too long as he asked his parents to move on from that place so they went to next tourist spot.
That incident didn't feel right with Arkya as he started to research on Konark's temple.
He realised that long before that temple was made, it was considered a holy place by the locals, a place where Sun God presided which was the belief of the local people, so when a king built this unique sun temple on that place, it quickly turned into a huge tourist spot in mordern era.
As he was trying find out more about his kryptonian origin from that Android mothership, he pressed a button falsely which opened a portal to another part of universe, it was called phantom zone, it was a prison for most notorious criminals in Krypton. A kryptonian mothership came out of that
It was the mothership of war mongering General Zod of kryptonian army who wanted all the power to himself so he was fighting a war against Kryptonian regime.
But he lost and sent in the phantom zone by Zor El with General Zod's huge army and his mothership.
They quickly realised that Krypton was completely destroyed but then he tried to find out who opened the portal of phantom zone, he quickly find out from his mothership that the signal came from another part of the universe.
Zod realised that there could be a Kryptonian connection so all hope wasn't lost, they quickly journeyed towards that source and they found out about earth.
After landing on earth, they realised that earth's atmosphere was making them Superhuman.
They quickly discovered that Android mothership in North pole but could not open as it was needed a DNA signature of Jor El and if he tired to force open the mothership, it will self destroy.
Zod didn't want that as there was a technology in that Android mothership which could terra form the whole earth into Krypton's design.
He wanted this out of pure nostalgia and superior feelings of being a Kryptonian as he hated earth and his local lesser human beings and most importantly they were finding it hard to adapt with earth's atmosphere so quickly as it was uncomfortable to them
He realised either Jor El or his off spring might be living here on earth masking as human as the android mothership was opened before.
He quickly took control of earth's communication system and announced to give him the kryptonian that was living on earth as human beings otherwise he would destroy one country after another and also announced that earth's nuclear warheads were ineffective against them as Earth had no defense against them.
Arkya realised just what was coming, he was very very scared as he never expected anything like this.
As an example, Zod ordered them to destroy Himalayan Mountains.
Realising that so many will be dead, Arkya quickly put on his kryptonian attire and evacuated everyone from nearby places and saw Himalayan Mountains were decimated by a ray from the mothership. He couldn't stop himself, he absorbed the ray by himself.
This is first time infront of everyone, the whole world, Arkya made his debut as the rest of world saw with disbelief as one guy in a blue tight absorbing some kind of otherworldly force. Every media's focus was on this incident.
Arkya jumped towards that ship and punched to the sky and it flew away by its impact towards the sky.
In the head office of ABP news media house in Kolkata, chief editor, Prithvi Das, ordered everyone to focus on this story as he asked his investigative journalist Luci Jain to investigate on this.
In the next day all the headline were saying the same thing about this "Superhuman the Superman"
General Zod realised from this defeat that he needed to be more calculative as earth's atmosphere made him a God.
He decided to find out more about this guy himself hiding himself as another human being.
He quickly realised that this guy was treated as God on Earth, he was pretending as some kind of Superhero.
Zod smiled to himself and said, "Enjoy while you can, I am quickly destroying your God play"
He quickly found out everything about Arkya and his earth found family, about Sana and everything else.
Zod realised that this guy had a lot of weakness as he attached himself too much with these earth beings.
He didn't waste time anymore and knocked on the Sen house's door and as Arkya opened the door, Zod smiled at him and said, "Are you done playing this childish Superhero bullshit? Because I don't have time for your childish whim, help me open that Android mothership and I will let you go and I could have taken you DNA signature any time I wanted but that's not my style and I have nothing to fear in this world"
Arkya was taken aback by all this and said, "You are the one who attacked earth, isn't it?"
Zod said, "So you have brains then, okay, I am going to be straight forward with you, I know everything about you, and if you don't give me what I want then I will kill everyone you hold dear"
Arkya punched towards Zod and Zod quickly avoided that and caught his punch easily and said, "Surprised!!! Initially, it took a little more time to adjust but now I am figuring it out, all of your power comes from earth atmosphere, the yellow solar system, ha, ha, now we all are Gods, you can't stop anything this time"
A huge battle was started which was loosing by Arkya as despite his superpower, he wasn't a trained soldier like General Zod.
Arkya lost this battle and said, ", I will never open that mothership, so fuck you"
General Zod said, "Ha, ha, I will take your dead body if that's what needed to be done" in saying this he was beating the shit out of Arkya.
General Zod said, "You are feeling good about yourself, isn't it? Ha, ha, let's see how tough you can be when it comes to others" in saying this he ordered one of his Soldier to bring Sana
Arkya said, "No!! Don't hurt her"
Zod said, "It's up to you"
Arkya said, "Fuck you"
Zod said, "Fuck me???!!! Fuck me???!!! Do you think I won't do it, you idiot..." in saying this he snapped the neck of Sana
Arkya was shocked out of his mind seeing his love's sorry demise
Water was coming down from his eyes, as he shouted with all of his emotions, every part of his body was angry, suddenly, he found himself flying and feeling all kinds of abilities and strength that he never knew existed.
Zod smiled and said, "So we can fly also!!? How wonderful!!! Good for us!!! Ha, ha, don't be so dramatic, just open the mothership"
Arkya attacked Zod with his full might and said, "You monster, you pushed me too far, now you will feel the consequences"
After a huge battle and a lot of destruction in which Arkya completely destroyed the kryptonian spaceship and was winning.
Zod said to his army, "This is no joke, attack him together and hold him down" as they were also adapting to earth's atmosphere and discovering about their new found abilities.
Forty something Kryptonians hold Arkya down and Zod came smiling and came close to him and said, "You idiot, you are not some kind of Superhero to us, we are all kryptonians, we are all Gods here, you thought you can take a whole kryptonian army by yourself, you dumb idiot"
Arkya was like wild animal in a cage, he looked at Zod with tremendous anger and suddenly a ray beam came out of his eyes and damaged Zod's eye.
He flew away holding Zod and came to Konark's temple thinking that when he was last time here, he was feeling weak and uncomfortable, he was hoping for similar things to Zod as well
But in reality, things didn't turn out that way
as quickly Zod's eye was regenerating.
Zod smiled and said with tremendous arrogance, "This is the best you can do, you dumbass, you are going to die today"
Arkya was feeling helpless and weak in Konark's temple but Zod was completely unaffected.
He came to Arkya and took his heart out and said, "You Stupid arrogant fool, you gave your lives for these lesser beings, you deserve to be dead"
As Zod was preparing to use the heart of Arkya to open the mothership by using its DNA signature
Suddenly, he heard a familiar tone, "I think it's time for you to get back wherever the hell you came from"
Zod looked behind and saw Arkya was standing in the air and bright lights were coming out of his body. His eyes were white.
Zod said, "More new powers, I presume, good for us then"
Arkya smiled and said, "I don't think so, monster, you will find this quite surprising" in saying this he moved so fast and snapped Zod's neck and ripped apart every part of Zod's body and looking at Arkya and the horrible demise of Zod, their general, the kryptonian army flew away towards space and Arkya was feeling very tired, he became unconscious
When he woke up, he saw a huge tree like figure standing in front of him and said, "Never use this kind of cosmic power again, it can destroy earth itself, if you do I am going to be standing in your way"
Arkya saw himself in his normal state and asked about his identity
He said, "I am the God of green, I am known as Swamp Thing in the mythology, you attracted my attention as I normally don't concern myself with meta alien superhuman like yourself but you turned out to be quite different than that, you are a demi God, you have Sun God Rao's blood flowing in your vains, I believe you are last sole survival of that bloodline, you activated it's power when you were in Konark's temple, it was where Rao was resting for so many years, you will never use this power again, you could destroy universe with these powers" in saying this Swamp Thing disappeared
As Superman became more and more popular as he not only saved the earth from alien attack but also helped build the cities again and repaired all the damage
Jonardon and Mitali, both said to Arkya, "What are you going to do now, Arkya? Everyone saw your face now, it will be hard for you live now among us"
Arkya smiled and said, "Don't worry, I discovered another power of mine in which I can shape shift my appearance just enough to look completely different from my normal Superman avatar, I will remain in this look as Arkya Sen and when I have to be Superman, I will shape shift myself to my original look, by the way, I am applying for a new intern job in Kolkata in ABP newspaper under Lucy Jain"
Both of them said, "We are giving our blessings, Arkya, not that you needed it, stay safe, we are extremely proud of you, my son"
Arkya said to them, "Your blessings are more valuable to me than Sun God's bloodline, so keep giving me those, I will always be needing those" in saying this he flew away towards big metropolitan City Kolkata.
The End
How do you like this? It's cool if you don't :D

#girlfantasy #Nojotocomedy #RIPStanLee #Nojoto #Pyar #Relationship #Nojotophotography #rain #Nojotodigitalart #Thoughts #Photography #Nojotovideo #shayri #Dil #Se #Nojotoofficial #Fun #Nojotovoice #hindipoetry #poetryinhindi #Nojotoenglish #Nojotohindi #cutefactory #Love #pinkmania #Art #Paint #rain #Gif #RehneDe #feelings #DigitalArt #Movie #Quotes #Sketch #Fitness #lloveyou #BreakUp #HeartBreak #Lovebites #shopholic #narcissistic #jokes #footballjokes #soccer #Sports #CR7 #Notebook #attentionseeker #everreadyforpose #whateverywomanwanttohear #teasingishot #awkwardcoffeedrinking #brainfreeze #whattypeofgirlami #notsayingpeace #notshowingvictrorysign #justsayingcheese #wishhewastgay #casanova #heartstealer #heartcapturer #OmG #promdatecrisis #mymom #Nojotocomedy #letsmakeout #aftergettingdrunk #tomcruise #hotmen #CATchmeifyoucan #50shadesofgrey #runawaybride #hairdyer #CAT #Tennis #Tennisjokes #hotsoccercoach #tastycook #devilsangel #discoveringnewpeaks #Dance #cupcakelove #goingbehindtrainersinstruction #angelwithhorn #whatagirlwishaboutherdog #whatapetdogwish #crazycatlady #whencatcrazebecomeextreme #fashiondesignergonecrazywithanimalright #shiveringwithexcitement #shiveringwithlove #ecentricfashiondesigner #ecentricphotographer #crazycatladygochristmassteroid #whensomeoneisdrunkandhigh #Nojotonews #painofashopholic #beingromantic #hotexpectation #symtomno1marrigeisboundtofail #hotattitude #romanticcouple #cluelesscouple #itsashallowworld
#groomingformen #timetogetserious
#maidofhonour #horriblemusicians #nextdoorgirl #Music #cutegirl #luckyboyfriend #hottestpowerfulcoupleinfiction #Superman #WonderWoman #poemunderthebluesky #petcatlover #morningbirdpoem
#thegirlwhohatesherlife #girlwhothinkseverythingispretty
#twosquirrelandagirl #ryangosling #crazystupidlove #commongirlfantasy #reunionafterbreakup #boyfriendgirlfriendjokes #happydreams #girlsneedchallangeinrelationship #whatgirlssecretlylike #whenyouwanttostayinbedhuggingyourboyfriend #forbiddenlove #extremeattraction #17thcenturyfrenchroyalwedding #WhyamInotfallinginlove
#WhyamInotfindingaboyfriend #spooning #luckyguy #toocute #oneofthoserelationship #horrormovies #Tattoo #nervousconversationalist #awkwardbff #takinginitiative #whenacouplesmellsogood #pillowtalk #chemistry #poorcluelessboyfriend #commontechproblem #extrememutualbreakup #makingfoodsfromcookingshow#coolselfieinthesummer #lackofcommunication #annoyingcouple #idioticphotoshoot #marmaidjokes #weirdestkidsquestion #Seriouslackofcommunication
#IwishIcanbemydog #peerpressure #exhustingwaitforyourcrushtocallyou #Lovetorture #girlsrighttostalkmen #wink #dolphincoupledrama #happyandinlove #girls #girlsquotes #happybirthday #viratkholi #Shiddat #khwaab #Artwork

8 Love

8 Signs He's Terrible And You Should Dump Him
Irrespective of how great the relationship was before, you should always know when it’s time to call it quits. While this may occasionally be because of a fault on one or both of your parts, sometimes it can be just because the relationship has run its course.
Encompassing all of this, here are a few reasons you should dump him:
1.) He couldn’t keep it in his pants.

Source
You will always deserve someone better than a person who cannot be faithful to you. If he doesn’t respect you enough to remain loyal, or call it off before he wanders to other people, you should know that there’s no amount of repeated apologizing that will ever make you truly forgive this violation of your trust. If not calling it off, consider it a strike.
2.) You just don't feel like staying loyal to him.

Source
Things work both ways. Just as you deserve better if he were to cheat, the same goes for him. If you do not believe that the relationship is worth you being faithful, be fair to the both of you, and part ways. Come clean about what you’ve done, if he chooses to forgive you, don’t abuse the trust.
3.) He is ashamed of you.

Source
Anyone who will not be proud, and want to parade you around in front of the world, doesn’t deserve your trust and love. If he makes you his dirty little secret, call it off, it will definitely cause some serious self-esteem issues for you later in life.
4.) You can’t do long distance.

Source
This is contextually based on whether there is a need to, but if there is, make sure that the two of you are confident and stable enough to try it. If not, go your separate ways before arguments and mistrust ruin the entire relationship, friendship included.
5.) He doesn’t even bother prioritizing you.

Source
If it’s his work or his family, cut him a little slack. But if you constantly find him flaking to only ever spend time with his friends, or other girls, confront him about it. If you’re not feeling loved, you really shouldn’t remain in the relationship for too If it’s his work or his family, cut him a little slack. But if you constantly find him flaking to only ever spend time with his friends, or other girls, confront him about it. If you’re not feeling loved, you really shouldn’t remain in the relationship for too long.
6.) He doesn’t want to take things as slowly as you want to.

Source
Every boy, if not person, should always be respectful of your space. If you are not ready for something, emotional or physical, ensure that he doesn’t overstep his bounds. Never be forced into doing something you don’t want to, and if you are, its time you ended things.
7.) He constantly compares you to other people.

Source
If he spends more time pulling you down, then making you feel good about yourself, the solution is pretty obvious. A relationship that survives on such a toxic bond will never last and cause some serious damage to one or both parties involved in it.
8.) It just, doesn’t work.

Source
While you should always put in your 100% and never bail when things get hard, it is equally important to know when the relationship is destined for failure. Don’t try pushing along a failing relationship, and making both of your lives miserable.


Source:
http://www.thatscoop.com/article/gabyextross/dump-him

3 Love

7 Secret Tips to Make Your Relationship Last Longer
There is no elaborate strategy or blueprint to the perfect relationship. In all honestly, all relationships are messy, and they all come with their own share of drama. It is your personal decision to make about whether you chose to work through it, or drop it completely. Make this decision as early in the relationship as possible, this will ensure that minimum damage is caused.
Here are a few secret (but seemingly simple) tips to a long lasting relationship:
1.) Be spontaneous.

Source
At no point in a relationship, should you give up. Keep them on their toes and always try to surprise them. Take random trips, plan crazy dates and take their breath away at every chance you get. Male or female, it is your duty to keep each other happy and interested throughout the relationship. If it’s worth it, put in the effort.
2.) Communicate.

Source
Don’t bottle up your feelings. This might work in the short term, but eventually, you will implode and cause more drama than you can imagine. Tell them if something bothers you, and more importantly if something makes you happy. This will ensure that they know what to avoid doing, and what to do to make your day better.
3.) Hook up.

Source
Don’t underestimate the power of some good between the sheets time. While you should be careful to prevent this from becoming all you do in your relationship, it is important to maintain a healthy balance. Not only is it a great stressbuster, it also gives you the opportunity to try out new and interesting things here too.
4.) Don’t lie.

Source
White lies to prevent drama and hurt are excusable – but do not make it a habit. When you find yourself lying about serious issues, or trying to cover up for yourself, you know you’ve taken it too far. Honesty is of utmost importance in a relationship. Without it, you lose your trust and then there’s no way to save whatever you may have with them.
5.) Don’t overshare.

Source
Don’t talk about sex with your ex, don’t constantly compare them to your past and definitely avoid criticizing them too much. Somethings must be kept to yourself, but do not use this as an excuse to be dishonest and hide the truth from them either.
6.) Be supportive.

Source
Support their dreams. While it is important for you to keep them sane and grounded, do not abuse this power by holding them back. Let them live their lives and fulfil their goals. Your job as their partner is to build them up and help them achieve everything they want. Be sure that this will always be reciprocated.
7.) Don't Judge

Source
Be the person they can come to with their problems. If they’re constantly worried about what you will think of them, or if you will judge them, they will find someone else to confide in. Provide them with a safe and secure environment in which they can share their deepest insecurities and feelings. This will bind you together in an unbreakable hold.


Source:
http://www.thatscoop.com/article/gabyextross/tips-relationship

3 Love

"VICTIM OF RAPE.. I don’t know how I managed to, I just knew that I was able to find my way home after fighting against his tight grip. I really can’t explain how devastated I am right now. My fiancé suddenly became a beast just because I didn’t permit him to have sex with me. It's not the first time I am experiencing this but the difference is, I got away this time. I thought ken was different. He is a Christian. He speaks in tongues. In fact, he is the youth pastor of his Church—so respected and admired. Why is all this happening to me, am I cursed? What ken did to me this evening brought back the memory of the incident that took place five years ago in my room when I was on campus. It was not really my fault because I wasn't aware of his plans in the first place. It was like the usual visit to my place after examination, before the end of the semester. I was happy to see him as usual. We were in a relationship, though he wasn't the Church type but he is a good guy and caring at that. My boyfriend came visiting and I made him comfortable in my abode by preparing his favourite meal and made him feel at home. The sun began to say farewell to daylight and the twinkle twinkle little stars took over the mantle from day and stood in the gap for itself. My roommate had gone for vigil as the semester was over. He had never slept in my place before, neither have I in his place even though he stays alone. I was surprised because it's past 8 and he wasn't making plans of leaving anytime soon. As if reading my mind, he said he won't be leaving as he planned to spend the night with me before going home and moreover, he knows my roommate had gone for vigil. I didn't want to argue. I adjusted the bedspread in the room and I made sure the door was properly locked, then we went to bed together. And in the middle of the night, I felt a movement on my body. I thought it was cockroach but I knew it wasn't somehow, then he spoke in the dark, "Baby I want to feel you a little, maybe it will help me sleep as I'm finding it difficult to sleep." When did I turn to lullaby? I said in my mind. Still struggling to open my mouth and say the word "NO, PLEASE" became a problem for me. While still contemplating how to turn him down without upsetting him, the pleasure I was getting wouldn't allow me. Many thoughts ran through my small mind and I finally said NO... NO... NO... DON'T. But my plea fell on deaf ears. I got up and turned on the light and behold the TONY I saw was not the guy I knew and loved. He was so strange and different. Before I knew what was going on my clothes and body were separated. Until today, I can't explain how that magic happened within seconds. "Please don't", was the song I sang till my roommate came back in the morning. I ended everything with him and I hated him from that day onward. Or is it when I visited my friend from the fellowship and how I was raped in his room, I wished I died that day. The looks on his friend's face and neighbors, I picked my shattered self and walked head down to my room. Or when I went to a remote village for service and the accommodation I was able to get because I was new to the area, how thieves visited that day and raped all the ladies there, of course I was not excluded. I sometimes asked myself how can one person, I mean one small lady, have 3 rape cases in her life time from different men—beasts I mean. I intentionally stayed away from men, anything men at all for four years. Ken changed everything. I mean, he was an angel sent to wipe my sorrow and pains away, at least so I thought. The testimony from his congregation about him gave me no doubt that he was the one. TONY blamed me for what he did to me, he blamed me for raping me, imagine that!! For years I was with the guilt that I caused the rape, but I realized it wasn't my fault in any way. Ken taught on rape on one of the days I went to church. Yes, I realized I had forgotten God and had to go back to Him. My life was empty, full of bitterness and pain. I needed to be free at least, I want to drop the heavy loads I was carrying daily. It was so obvious that something was missing in my life, something no man can give. I resumed going to Church and studying the word. I was invited to ken's Church and l liked the atmosphere and decided to stay, I decided to pitch my tent there. That was when the announcement of their youth programme was made, I gave it a thought to attend. After hearing the word from the mouth of an handsome preacher like Ken, I was broken and I rededicated my life to God. We became friends and finally got into a relationship. I finally thought THIS IS IT. I was happy, he was happy too and everything was just fine. I thought he was different because he talked about marriage, the very first guy to tell me he wants to get married to me. WHY? WHY?? WHY??? All men are after sex! I screamed at myself many times in the bathroom. Sleep had lost its place in me that day, so I decided to surf my phone. In the process, I saw a post on Facebook about rape by Louisa Ene Winnie and thought to read through. I then decided to tell my friend about my ordeals. I decided to share my story to let someone know how I have been feeling. Gift was my roommate from year one until we graduated. She was devoted and humble. I have always admired her—everything about her—but I felt since we were both Christians there is nothing special about her. Notwithstanding, deep down I knew she was a better Christian than I am and a true one at that. Fortunately for me, we attend the same Church but she is married with two kids and I try to avoid her most times in Church for no particular reason if you ask me or maybe am not being truthful to myself. I know she somehow knew about me and pastor Ken (as he is fondly called by members). I phoned her the next day and after exchanging pleasantries I told her I wanted to see her and it was very urgent. Gift is so caring that she agreed to see me that day and we fixed a venue for our meeting, of course my place. Immediately I saw my friend I couldn't hold back the tears, as I cried on her soft shoulders. After some minutes of silence she said pastor Ken told her what happened and he is asking for my forgiveness. I wasn't surprised because I once introduced him to Gift as my roommate and friend in school. But I didn't think he would tell her what he did to me, oh sorry, what he wanted to do to me. She told me the same guy who attempted to rape me reported to her that I no longer answer his calls nor respond to his messages. “He must have lost his mind. What is he thinking?" I said and immediately narrated my side of the story to Gift. She just smirked after my long narration. “Gift, what’s all this? I expected you to scream and thank God for me but you are smiling instead. Don’t tell me you are for him or is it because he is a pastor?" “Hey! Calm down” Gift said still smiling. "Do you know enough about this guy before going into a relationship with him?" She asked me. "Off course. I know his family members and a lot about his background. Besides the testimonies I heard about him gave me convictions that he is the one for me. He is a Pastor, he preaches so well and speaks in tongues." "Babe, that’s not what I mean. Forget his family and his positions now. What do you know about his values? The person he is?" “Eeeemmm….. he is a Christian, a Pastor.” "Forget all that for now!" Gift replied almost immediately. "I would be realistic with you, Cherish. I do not blame your ex boyfriends if not you. How could you be so insensitive that you are making the same mistake again?" "Gift tell me what you know, I want to be married like you and have a family." "Cherish, in choosing a partner, if your values are not known and considered then you are planting banana peels on your way because the relationship might never result in marriage and even if it does the marriage have high chances of being faulty. You know why? Value systems is key to building solid relationships." "This is why friendship should be the foundation of every boy and girl relationship. It is during the friendship stage that you get to discover his or her values like, his stand on purity, his goals, his priorities and many more and whether they align with yours or not. Then you get to know if he or she is someone you can go into a relationship with. Relationship is by choice just like friendship not by force or by pressure." “Gift, how do I know someone’s values? After all I am not a witch.” "You ask questions dear. You need to ask questions concerning what you want to know. You don’t keep mute and be assuming that since he says he is a Christian or a Pastor and he goes to church he is for sexual purity. It doesn’t work that way." "Pastors are humans too, though expectations are much of them but remember they are humans and thus not excluded from mistakes. They are men and women with blood flowing in their veins." "You could ask like this, what is your view about sexual abstinence until marriage? What are your priorities? I won't dispute the fact that every guy irrespective of who they are and what office they occupy wants just one thing in a relationship. Which is SEX, SEX and SEX! Yes. I can say that again and again. They want it now, soon or later after marriage. What depicts their values is when they want it. It is now your choice to choose the one you want among them. That is why questioning is very vital before accepting a relationship and during the relationship before marriage is finally considered. The habit of not asking questions has brought marriages to an end. Ask questions. It will save you from unnecessary heartbreaks, like this. Thank God you were able to escape. Another thing you should know, you shouldn't be visiting him alone especially in his house, except family house, and ensure people are around when you're together. If you must go alone make sure it is an open place like eateries or gardens, places where people are. Leave no room for temptation at all. In all I have said forgive him but mind you the decision is still yours to make, I won't tell you to go back to him or not, with all I have said make your conclusion. Of course, ask the Holy Spirit to help you. Mind you, If your relationship with God is not solid, your relationship with the man will fail. Let no one tell you otherwise, Sex isn't part of a relationship personal terms and agreement. It is part of marriage covenant." I wanted telling her about the other two rape cases that happened to me but I think I know what to do now, heal properly with the help of the Holy Spirit, forgive my offenders including Ken and solidify my relationship with God. Enough of keeping to myself, it's time to grow and glow with God's children. I saw lots of impactful articles on Winnie Ene Louisa's timeline for singles, it's time to read them up and learn. Of course I'm not going back to ken but I must forgive him and move on. Thanks so much Gift, I wish I had spoken to you long time ago just maybe things wouldn't be like this, but I'm glad to know now. We are so many, Cherish, out there dying in silent pain. Some have been so consumed with self guilt that suicide was their only escape. Some blame their self for crimes that wasn't their fault that low self-esteem is now their name. Jesus is the solution to all situation. I'm Winnie making impact. I say NO to rape. I say NO to suicide. Yes to freedom in Christ. I help singles lead godly healthy relationship. I Write, Speak and Advocate. ©Winnie Ene Louisa"

VICTIM OF RAPE..

I don’t know how I managed to, I just knew that I was able to find my way home after fighting against his tight grip. I really can’t explain how devastated I am right now. My fiancé  suddenly became a beast just because I didn’t permit him to have sex with me.

It's not the first time I am experiencing this but the difference is, I got away this time. I thought ken was different. He is a Christian. He speaks in tongues. In fact, he is the youth pastor of his Church—so respected and admired.

Why is all this happening to me, am I cursed? 

What ken did to me this evening brought back the memory of the incident that took place five years ago in my room when I was on campus.

It was not really my fault because I wasn't aware of his plans in the first place. It was like the usual visit to my place after examination, before the end of the semester. I was happy to see him as usual. We were in a relationship, though he wasn't the Church type but he is a good guy and caring at that.

My boyfriend came visiting and I made him comfortable in my abode by preparing his favourite meal and made him feel at home.

The sun began to say farewell to daylight and the twinkle twinkle little stars took over the mantle from day and stood in the gap for itself.

My roommate had gone for vigil as the semester was over. He had never slept in my place before, neither have I in his place even though he stays alone. I was surprised because it's past 8 and he wasn't making plans of leaving anytime soon.

As if reading my mind, he said he won't be leaving as he planned to spend the night with me before going home and moreover, he knows my roommate had gone for vigil. I didn't want to argue.

I adjusted the bedspread in the room and I made sure the door was properly locked, then we went to bed together.

And in the middle of the night, I felt a movement on my body. I thought it was cockroach but I knew it wasn't somehow, then he spoke in the dark, "Baby I want to feel you a little, maybe it will help me sleep as I'm finding it difficult to sleep." When did I turn to lullaby? I said in my mind.

Still struggling to open my mouth and say the word "NO, PLEASE" became a problem for me. While still contemplating how to turn him down without upsetting him, the pleasure I was getting wouldn't allow me. Many thoughts ran through my small mind and I finally said NO... NO... NO... DON'T.

But my plea fell on deaf ears. I got up and turned on the light and behold the TONY I saw was not the guy I knew and loved. He was so strange and different. 

Before I knew what was going on my clothes and body were separated. Until today, I can't explain how that magic happened within seconds. "Please don't", was the song I sang till my roommate came back in the morning.

I ended everything with him and I hated him from that day onward.

Or is it when I visited my friend from the fellowship and how I was raped in his room, I wished I died that day. The looks on his friend's face and neighbors, I picked my shattered self and walked head down to my room.

Or when I went to a remote village for service and the accommodation I was able to get because I was new to the area, how thieves visited that day and raped all the ladies there, of course I was not excluded.

I sometimes asked myself how can one person, I mean one small lady, have 3 rape cases in her life time from different men—beasts I mean.

I intentionally stayed away from men, anything men at all for four years.

Ken changed everything. I mean, he was an angel sent to wipe my sorrow and pains away, at least so I thought.

The testimony from his congregation about him gave me no doubt that he was the one.

TONY blamed me for what he did to me, he blamed me for raping me, imagine that!! For years I was with the guilt that I caused the rape, but I realized it wasn't my fault in any way. 

Ken taught on rape on one of the days I went to church. Yes, I realized I had forgotten God and had to go back to Him. My life was empty, full of bitterness and pain. I needed to be free at least, I want to drop the heavy loads I was carrying daily. 

It was so obvious that something was missing in my life, something no man can give. I resumed going to Church and studying the word.

I was invited to ken's Church and l liked the atmosphere and decided to stay, I decided to pitch my tent there. That was when the announcement of their youth programme was made, I gave it a thought to attend.

After hearing the word from the mouth of an handsome preacher like Ken, I was broken and I rededicated my life to God.

We became friends and finally got into a relationship. I finally thought THIS IS IT. 

I was happy, he was happy too and everything was just fine. I thought he was different because he talked about marriage, the very first guy to tell me he wants to get married to me.

WHY?                 WHY??                 WHY???

All men are after sex! I screamed at myself many times in the bathroom.

Sleep had lost its place in me that day, so I decided to surf my phone.

In the process, I saw a post on Facebook about rape by Louisa Ene Winnie and thought to read through. I then decided to tell my friend about my ordeals. I decided to share my story to let someone know how I have been feeling.

Gift was my roommate from year one until we graduated. She was devoted and humble. I have always admired her—everything about her—but I felt since we were both Christians there is nothing special about her. Notwithstanding, deep down I knew she was a better Christian than I am and a true one at that.

Fortunately for me, we attend the same Church but she is married with two kids and I try to avoid her most times in Church for no particular reason if you ask me or maybe am not being truthful to myself.

I know she somehow knew about me and pastor Ken (as he is fondly called by members).

I phoned her the next day and after exchanging pleasantries I told her I wanted to see her and it was very urgent.

Gift is so caring that she agreed to see me that day and we fixed a venue for our meeting, of course my place.

Immediately I saw my friend I couldn't hold back the tears, as I cried on her soft shoulders.

After some minutes of silence she said pastor Ken told her what happened and he is asking for my forgiveness.

I wasn't surprised because I once introduced him to Gift as my roommate and friend in school. But I didn't think he would tell her what he did to me, oh sorry, what he wanted to do to me.

She told me the same guy who attempted to rape me reported to her that I no longer answer his calls nor respond to his messages. “He must have lost his mind. What is he thinking?" I said and immediately narrated my side of the story to Gift. She just smirked after my long narration. 

“Gift, what’s all this? I expected you to scream and thank God for me but you are smiling instead. Don’t tell me you are for him or is it because he is a pastor?"

“Hey! Calm down” Gift said still smiling. "Do you know enough about this guy before going into a relationship with him?" She asked me. "Off course. I know his family members and a lot about his background. Besides the testimonies I heard about him gave me convictions that he is the one for me. He is a Pastor, he preaches so well and speaks in tongues."

"Babe, that’s not what I mean. Forget his family and his positions now. What do you know about his values? The person he is?"

“Eeeemmm….. he is a Christian, a Pastor.” "Forget all that for now!" Gift replied almost immediately. "I would be realistic with you, Cherish. I do not blame your ex boyfriends if not you. How could you be so insensitive that you are making the same mistake again?" 

"Gift tell me what you know, I want to be married like you and have a family."

"Cherish, in choosing a partner, if your values are not known and considered then you are planting banana peels on your way because the relationship might never result in marriage and even if it does the marriage have high chances of being faulty. You know why? Value systems is key to building solid relationships."

"This is why friendship should be the foundation of every boy and girl relationship. It is during the friendship stage that you get to discover his or her values like, his stand on purity, his goals, his priorities and many more and whether they align with yours or not. Then you get to know if he or she is someone you can go into a relationship with. Relationship is by choice just like friendship not by force or by pressure."

“Gift, how do I know someone’s values? After all I am not a witch.” "You ask questions dear. You need to ask questions concerning what you want to know. You don’t keep mute and be assuming that since he says he is a Christian or a Pastor and he goes to church he is for sexual purity. It doesn’t work that way."

"Pastors are humans too, though expectations are much of them but remember they are humans and thus not excluded from mistakes. They are men and women with blood flowing in their veins."

"You could ask like this, what is your view about sexual abstinence until marriage? What are your priorities?

I won't dispute the fact that every guy irrespective of who they are and what office they occupy wants just one thing in a relationship. Which is SEX, SEX and SEX!  Yes. I can say that again and again. They want it now, soon or later after marriage. What depicts their values is when they want it. 

It is now your choice to choose the one you want among them. That is why questioning is very vital before accepting a relationship and during the relationship before marriage is finally considered.

The habit of not asking questions has brought marriages to an end. Ask questions. It will save you from unnecessary heartbreaks, like this. Thank God you were able to escape. 

Another thing you should know, you shouldn't be visiting him alone especially in his house, except family house, and ensure people are around when you're together. If you must go alone make sure it is an open place like eateries or gardens, places where people are. Leave no room for temptation at all.

In all I have said forgive him but mind you the decision is still yours to make, I won't tell you to go back to him or not, with all I have said make your conclusion. Of course, ask the Holy Spirit to help you. Mind you, If your relationship with God is not solid, your relationship with the man will fail. 

Let no one tell you otherwise, Sex isn't part of a relationship personal terms and agreement. It is part of marriage covenant."

I wanted telling her about the other two rape cases that happened to me but I think I know what to do now, heal properly with the help of the Holy Spirit, forgive my offenders including Ken and solidify my relationship with God. 

Enough of keeping to myself, it's time to grow and glow with God's children. I saw lots of impactful articles on Winnie Ene Louisa's timeline for singles, it's time to read them up and learn.

Of course I'm not going back to ken but I must forgive him and move on.

Thanks so much Gift, I wish I had spoken to you long time ago just maybe things wouldn't be like this, but I'm glad to know now.

We are so many, Cherish, out there dying in silent pain. Some have been so consumed with self guilt that suicide was their only escape. 

Some blame their self for crimes that wasn't their fault that low self-esteem is now their name.

Jesus is the solution to all situation.

I'm Winnie making impact.

I say NO to rape.

I say NO to suicide.

Yes to freedom in  Christ.

I help singles lead godly healthy relationship.

I Write, Speak and Advocate.

©Winnie Ene Louisa

#Saynotorape
#saynotosexualabuse
#saynotosuicide

23 Love
2 Share

VICTIM OF RAPE..

I don’t know how I managed to, I just knew that I was able to find my way home after fighting against his tight grip. I really can’t explain how devastated I am right now. My fiancé suddenly became a beast just because I didn’t permit him to have sex with me.

It's not the first time I am experiencing this but the difference is, I got away this time. I thought ken was different. He is a Christian. He speaks in tongues. In fact, he is the youth pastor of his Church—so respected and admired.

Why is all this happening to me, am I cursed?

What ken did to me this evening brought back the memory of the incident that took place five years ago in my room when I was on campus.

It was not really my fault because I wasn't aware of his plans in the first place. It was like the usual visit to my place after examination, before the end of the semester. I was happy to see him as usual. We were in a relationship, though he wasn't the Church type but he is a good guy and caring at that.

My boyfriend came visiting and I made him comfortable in my abode by preparing his favourite meal and made him feel at home.

The sun began to say farewell to daylight and the twinkle twinkle little stars took over the mantle from day and stood in the gap for itself.

My roommate had gone for vigil as the semester was over. He had never slept in my place before, neither have I in his place even though he stays alone. I was surprised because it's past 8 and he wasn't making plans of leaving anytime soon.

As if reading my mind, he said he won't be leaving as he planned to spend the night with me before going home and moreover, he knows my roommate had gone for vigil. I didn't want to argue.

I adjusted the bedspread in the room and I made sure the door was properly locked, then we went to bed together.

And in the middle of the night, I felt a movement on my body. I thought it was cockroach but I knew it wasn't somehow, then he spoke in the dark, "Baby I want to feel you a little, maybe it will help me sleep as I'm finding it difficult to sleep." When did I turn to lullaby? I said in my mind.

Still struggling to open my mouth and say the word "NO, PLEASE" became a problem for me. While still contemplating how to turn him down without upsetting him, the pleasure I was getting wouldn't allow me. Many thoughts ran through my small mind and I finally said NO... NO... NO... DON'T.

But my plea fell on deaf ears. I got up and turned on the light and behold the TONY I saw was not the guy I knew and loved. He was so strange and different.

Before I knew what was going on my clothes and body were separated. Until today, I can't explain how that magic happened within seconds. "Please don't", was the song I sang till my roommate came back in the morning.

I ended everything with him and I hated him from that day onward.

Or is it when I visited my friend from the fellowship and how I was raped in his room, I wished I died that day. The looks on his friend's face and neighbors, I picked my shattered self and walked head down to my room.

Or when I went to a remote village for service and the accommodation I was able to get because I was new to the area, how thieves visited that day and raped all the ladies there, of course I was not excluded.

I sometimes asked myself how can one person, I mean one small lady, have 3 rape cases in her life time from different men—beasts I mean.

I intentionally stayed away from men, anything men at all for four years.

Ken changed everything. I mean, he was an angel sent to wipe my sorrow and pains away, at least so I thought.

The testimony from his congregation about him gave me no doubt that he was the one.

TONY blamed me for what he did to me, he blamed me for raping me, imagine that!! For years I was with the guilt that I caused the rape, but I realized it wasn't my fault in any way.

Ken taught on rape on one of the days I went to church. Yes, I realized I had forgotten God and had to go back to Him. My life was empty, full of bitterness and pain. I needed to be free at least, I want to drop the heavy loads I was carrying daily.

It was so obvious that something was missing in my life, something no man can give. I resumed going to Church and studying the word.

I was invited to ken's Church and l liked the atmosphere and decided to stay, I decided to pitch my tent there. That was when the announcement of their youth programme was made, I gave it a thought to attend.

After hearing the word from the mouth of an handsome preacher like Ken, I was broken and I rededicated my life to God.

We became friends and finally got into a relationship. I finally thought THIS IS IT.

I was happy, he was happy too and everything was just fine. I thought he was different because he talked about marriage, the very first guy to tell me he wants to get married to me.

WHY? WHY?? WHY???

All men are after sex! I screamed at myself many times in the bathroom.

Sleep had lost its place in me that day, so I decided to surf my phone.

In the process, I saw a post on Facebook about rape by Louisa Ene Winnie and thought to read through. I then decided to tell my friend about my ordeals. I decided to share my story to let someone know how I have been feeling.

Gift was my roommate from year one until we graduated. She was devoted and humble. I have always admired her—everything about her—but I felt since we were both Christians there is nothing special about her. Notwithstanding, deep down I knew she was a better Christian than I am and a true one at that.

Fortunately for me, we attend the same Church but she is married with two kids and I try to avoid her most times in Church for no particular reason if you ask me or maybe am not being truthful to myself.

I know she somehow knew about me and pastor Ken (as he is fondly called by members).

I phoned her the next day and after exchanging pleasantries I told her I wanted to see her and it was very urgent.

Gift is so caring that she agreed to see me that day and we fixed a venue for our meeting, of course my place.

Immediately I saw my friend I couldn't hold back the tears, as I cried on her soft shoulders.

After some minutes of silence she said pastor Ken told her what happened and he is asking for my forgiveness.

I wasn't surprised because I once introduced him to Gift as my roommate and friend in school. But I didn't think he would tell her what he did to me, oh sorry, what he wanted to do to me.

She told me the same guy who attempted to rape me reported to her that I no longer answer his calls nor respond to his messages. “He must have lost his mind. What is he thinking?" I said and immediately narrated my side of the story to Gift. She just smirked after my long narration.

“Gift, what’s all this? I expected you to scream and thank God for me but you are smiling instead. Don’t tell me you are for him or is it because he is a pastor?"

“Hey! Calm down” Gift said still smiling. "Do you know enough about this guy before going into a relationship with him?" She asked me. "Off course. I know his family members and a lot about his background. Besides the testimonies I heard about him gave me convictions that he is the one for me. He is a Pastor, he preaches so well and speaks in tongues."

"Babe, that’s not what I mean. Forget his family and his positions now. What do you know about his values? The person he is?"

“Eeeemmm….. he is a Christian, a Pastor.” "Forget all that for now!" Gift replied almost immediately. "I would be realistic with you, Cherish. I do not blame your ex boyfriends if not you. How could you be so insensitive that you are making the same mistake again?"

"Gift tell me what you know, I want to be married like you and have a family."

"Cherish, in choosing a partner, if your values are not known and considered then you are planting banana peels on your way because the relationship might never result in marriage and even if it does the marriage have high chances of being faulty. You know why? Value systems is key to building solid relationships."

"This is why friendship should be the foundation of every boy and girl relationship. It is during the friendship stage that you get to discover his or her values like, his stand on purity, his goals, his priorities and many more and whether they align with yours or not. Then you get to know if he or she is someone you can go into a relationship with. Relationship is by choice just like friendship not by force or by pressure."

“Gift, how do I know someone’s values? After all I am not a witch.” "You ask questions dear. You need to ask questions concerning what you want to know. You don’t keep mute and be assuming that since he says he is a Christian or a Pastor and he goes to church he is for sexual purity. It doesn’t work that way."

"Pastors are humans too, though expectations are much of them but remember they are humans and thus not excluded from mistakes. They are men and women with blood flowing in their veins."

"You could ask like this, what is your view about sexual abstinence until marriage? What are your priorities?

I won't dispute the fact that every guy irrespective of who they are and what office they occupy wants just one thing in a relationship. Which is SEX, SEX and SEX! Yes. I can say that again and again. They want it now, soon or later after marriage. What depicts their values is when they want it.

It is now your choice to choose the one you want among them. That is why questioning is very vital before accepting a relationship and during the relationship before marriage is finally considered.

The habit of not asking questions has brought marriages to an end. Ask questions. It will save you from unnecessary heartbreaks, like this. Thank God you were able to escape.

Another thing you should know, you shouldn't be visiting him alone especially in his house, except family house, and ensure people are around when you're together. If you must go alone make sure it is an open place like eateries or gardens, places where people are. Leave no room for temptation at all.

In all I have said forgive him but mind you the decision is still yours to make, I won't tell you to go back to him or not, with all I have said make your conclusion. Of course, ask the Holy Spirit to help you. Mind you, If your relationship with God is not solid, your relationship with the man will fail.

Let no one tell you otherwise, Sex isn't part of a relationship personal terms and agreement. It is part of marriage covenant."

I wanted telling her about the other two rape cases that happened to me but I think I know what to do now, heal properly with the help of the Holy Spirit, forgive my offenders including Ken and solidify my relationship with God.

Enough of keeping to myself, it's time to grow and glow with God's children. I saw lots of impactful articles on Winnie Ene Louisa's timeline for singles, it's time to read them up and learn.

Of course I'm not going back to ken but I must forgive him and move on.

Thanks so much Gift, I wish I had spoken to you long time ago just maybe things wouldn't be like this, but I'm glad to know now.

We are so many, Cherish, out there dying in silent pain. Some have been so consumed with self guilt that suicide was their only escape.

Some blame their self for crimes that wasn't their fault that low self-esteem is now their name.

Jesus is the solution to all situation.

I'm Winnie making impact.

I say NO to rape.

I say NO to suicide.

Yes to freedom in Christ.

I help singles lead godly healthy relationship.

I Write, Speak and Advocate.

©Winnie Ene Louisa

4 Love

Let's hear a story then :D
It will be in DC universe. I will name this story- Superman: The Rise Of Indian Sun God
Okay, this is Earth 21 where Superman doesn't exist, atleast not yet :D
Let me start from the beginning. God wave is a cosmic force that came out of source wall to create new Gods and in the process creating other worldly God like Sun God Rao who later created earth and so many others planets in the universe and also was responsible for creating many Superheroes (meta humans) through out universe including earth.
Krypton was one of those Planet. Kryptonians at the beginning of their civilization were aware of Rao's presence but with times they forgot as Rao was disappeared from krypton. Noone knew Rao's presence or where would he be disappeared? As the time progress, Krypton became technologically superior planet in the universe. They soon thought Rao as another mythological superstition.
CC Batson and Marlyn Batson(incase you don't know they are parents of yet to born Shazam aka Captain Marvel aka Billy Batson) were world famous archeologist from America.
They came to India to research on old Konark's Temple in Orissa
They found a lot of wall drawings were similar to Australian aboriginal people's cave drawings about Sun God.
It was this mystery that got them hooked into this.
They were using some kind of radiation meter on the temple's wall. They were facinated to find out that it was giving same kind of radiation signal as it did in that Australian cave. But the difference was that in this case radiation levels were higher as if to say some kind of power source was inside the temple or under it.
Suddenly, an Indian police came running angrily and took their equipment from their hand and threw it away shouting, "Not permitted, not permitted"
CC said to him, "You aren't understanding, there's some of kind of power source under this temple....."
Indian Police said again, "Not permitted, go to the authority"
That equipment had electro magnetic system inside and as it clashed with temple's wall, it burst with strong electromagnetic waves of current.
It shook the ground.
The whole temple was shaking.
Suddenly, a bright light flew away towards sky by shaking everything.
It almost crashed into the sky and opened a portal or warm whole to a completely different part of universe, it came to planet Krypton and destroyed it's core and went inside the baby son of Jor El, the chief of science in krypton.
Jor El was shocked by this whole incident but was even more shocked looking the fact that Kal El was completely alright.
Suddenly, alarm bells were ringing.
Jor El found out that krypton was about to be destroyed.
Suddenly, he found out about the opened portal to another part of universe and also a blue planet, he sent an android robot to find out more.
In the meantime, everyone in krypton was looking for an way out but almost all the mother ship was destroyed.
One ship was remained which was owned by Jor El.
After getting all the necessary information about this blue planet called Earth, Jor El was preparing for departure with his wife and baby son but caught by other kryptonians.
But that mothership was limited, it couldn't take all the kryptonians so there was a huge battle between them, realising the eventual destruction of this mothership, Jor El send Kal El by small spaceship to earth as he knew Kal El would be able to survive in earth atmosphere infact he will be superior to local earth people because of their yellow solar system.
In earth-
There was a small-town named Satyavila outside the metropolitan city Kolkata.
A couple (Jonardon Sen and Mitali Sen) was doing a picnic in jungle area outside locality as it was romantic. They were childless so they were very romantic to each other to fill the gap in their relationship.
Suddenly, they saw a bright light came from the sky and crashed into the jungle destroying a number of threes in the jungle.
Both of them went there to see what was going on and they saw a boy child was smiling towards them holding a huge tree easily overhead!!!!
They said to each other, "Oh! My God, that's not human!!!"
But looking at the innocent smile on that boy's face they decided to bring him their home while hiding his little spaceship in a nearby cave in that jungle.
They decided to bring him up as their own.
He was named Arkya Sen. Arkya realised when he was growing up that he wasn't like other teenagers. He had abnormal strength, speed, durability and so many other ability.
But Arkya never wanted to have any powers, infact he used to be scared so that no-one could find out that he was freak
So he put in that extra bit of effort not to look anything but a human and simultaneously avoided using any of his powers and he got used to that and almost pretend to forget that he had this unnatural abilities.
Arkya just wanted a normal life.
He used to go to school and had fun with his friends, played Cricket with his friends and liked a girl who just moved in next door with her family.
She was two years older than Arkya and adult 18 years old. And she already had a boyfriend. Her name was Sana Ang, a North East Indian.
Pritam Roy was the best friend of Arkya and both of them used to spend a lot of time together. Pritam didn't know about his best friend's secret though as Jonardon asked Arkya not to disclose his identity to anyone expecting public panic.
One day-
Pritam said to Arkya, ", Come on man, you are aiming for too high, she is way out of your league plus she is senior and already has a boyfriend"
Arkya said, "I know but I can't help it man, I am thinking about her all the time"
Suddenly Mitali asked Arkya to go to Sana's house to welcome them with some sweets.
Pritam said to Arkya with a canny smile, "Ha, ha, as if you were not looking for any opportunities to go there!"
Both of them went there and knocked on the door and door opened and they saw a smiling Sana opened the door while talking on her tablet.
Arkya quickly said, "My mother is welcoming you and your family to our neighborhood and this is some sweets"
Sana just smiled at them and asked them to come in and then called her mother and went to her room.
Both Arkya and Pritam were bored talking to Sana's mom.
Later Pritam said, "She didn't even look at us, man, she was busy talking in her phone, probably with that guy she was going out, you have got no chance"
Arkya said, "I know, we are just two kids to her so no wonder she won't even look at us, okay, I will try to forget about her"
In few months later-
There was a huge storm in Satyavila.
Sana's house was damaged because of that.
Arkya said to Jonardon, "Dad, I can help them"
Jonardon said, "Okay, do whatever you can do but be very careful, remember noone should see you"
Suddenly, Sana's mom and Sana saw a blur came and before they realised what was going on, they saw themselves in Sen house.
Sana and her mom was shocked and asked to them, "What's going on?"
Both Jonardon and Mitali said to them that their house was damaged and they were unconscious because of some kind of accident related to this disaster so they brought them their home, they just woke up.
Sana and Sana's mom found this unbelievable but could not find any other explanation either so they kind of reluctantly accepted this
Arkya was smiling.
This was the first time, Sana actually noticed Arkya.
She said, "Hi! You are so cute, Arkya is your name, isn't it?"
Arkya shook his head affirmatively
They talked for a while and had fun.
As the time was progressing Arkya was discovering his kryptonian abilities one by one, he even went to that jungle to that hidden space ship to find out more about his origin but couldn't find much unfortunately.
One day Arkya decided to experiment with his powers by going to the house roof but he instead saw Sana was crying in their house roof.
Arkya asked her what happened
Sana said that she just broke up with her boyfriend.
Even though he liked that news but instead put on sad face and decided to console her.
They were spending more time together from here on.
One day Sana asked to Arkya directly, "Do you have a crush on me?"
Arkya decided to tell her everything
Sana was shocked hearing this and she said with a nice smile, "From the first day!!! I am flattered but you are just 16 years old and I am two years older than you!! And I never saw you anything more than that, I am very sorry, Arkya, but let's be true friend first"
Arkya thought to himself, "Damn, friend-zoned!!! But hey, what else was possible!??!"
One day, when Arkya was in his space ship, he saw a signal in his space ship's interface that was coming from North pole
He used his superspeed and quickly ran towards North pole and reached there after a while.
He saw another huge mothership crashed there.
It was that Android mothership which was sent by Jor El to investigate on Earth
In there, Arkya first time learnt about his kryptonian origin and everything else that associated with it.
He found a kryptonian attire.
He realised that it was different from any earth cloth as wearing it didn't feel like it could burn out when he was running in superspeed.
He tested that theory and proved right.
A few years later-
One day the whole Sen family went to the vacation in Orissa.
Konark's temple was on their bucket list as tourist spot.
When Arkya entered the temple, he suddenly realised something different about him, as every part of his body was charged up.
He didn't stay there for too long as he asked his parents to move on from that place so they went to next tourist spot.
That incident didn't feel right with Arkya as he started to research on Konark's temple.
He realised that long before that temple was made, it was considered a holy place by the locals, a place where Sun God presided which was the belief of the local people, so when a king built this unique sun temple on that place, it quickly turned into a huge tourist spot in mordern era.
As he was trying find out more about his kryptonian origin from that Android mothership, he pressed a button falsely which opened a portal to another part of universe, it was called phantom zone, it was a prison for most notorious criminals in Krypton. A kryptonian mothership came out of that
It was the mothership of war mongering General Zod of kryptonian army who wanted all the power to himself so he was fighting a war against Kryptonian regime.
But he lost and sent in the phantom zone by Zor El with General Zod's huge army and his mothership.
They quickly realised that Krypton was completely destroyed but then he tried to find out who opened the portal of phantom zone, he quickly find out from his mothership that the signal came from another part of the universe.
Zod realised that there could be a Kryptonian connection so all hope wasn't lost, they quickly journeyed towards that source and they found out about earth.
After landing on earth, they realised that earth's atmosphere was making them Superhuman.
They quickly discovered that Android mothership in North pole but could not open as it was needed a DNA signature of Jor El and if he tired to force open the mothership, it will self destroy.
Zod didn't want that as there was a technology in that Android mothership which could terra form the whole earth into Krypton's design.
He wanted this out of pure nostalgia and superior feelings of being a Kryptonian as he hated earth and his local lesser human beings and most importantly they were finding it hard to adapt with earth's atmosphere so quickly as it was uncomfortable to them
He realised either Jor El or his off spring might be living here on earth masking as human as the android mothership was opened before.
He quickly took control of earth's communication system and announced to give him the kryptonian that was living on earth as human beings otherwise he would destroy one country after another and also announced that earth's nuclear warheads were ineffective against them as Earth had no defense against them.
Arkya realised just what was coming, he was very very scared as he never expected anything like this.
As an example, Zod ordered them to destroy Himalayan Mountains.
Realising that so many will be dead, Arkya quickly put on his kryptonian attire and evacuated everyone from nearby places and saw Himalayan Mountains were decimated by a ray from the mothership. He couldn't stop himself, he absorbed the ray by himself.
This is first time infront of everyone, the whole world, Arkya made his debut as the rest of world saw with disbelief as one guy in a blue tight absorbing some kind of otherworldly force. Every media's focus was on this incident.
Arkya jumped towards that ship and punched to the sky and it flew away by its impact towards the sky.
In the head office of ABP news media house in Kolkata, chief editor, Prithvi Das, ordered everyone to focus on this story as he asked his investigative journalist Luci Jain to investigate on this.
In the next day all the headline were saying the same thing about this "Superhuman the Superman"
General Zod realised from this defeat that he needed to be more calculative as earth's atmosphere made him a God.
He decided to find out more about this guy himself hiding himself as another human being.
He quickly realised that this guy was treated as God on Earth, he was pretending as some kind of Superhero.
Zod smiled to himself and said, "Enjoy while you can, I am quickly destroying your God play"
He quickly found out everything about Arkya and his earth found family, about Sana and everything else.
Zod realised that this guy had a lot of weakness as he attached himself too much with these earth beings.
He didn't waste time anymore and knocked on the Sen house's door and as Arkya opened the door, Zod smiled at him and said, "Are you done playing this childish Superhero bullshit? Because I don't have time for your childish whim, help me open that Android mothership and I will let you go and I could have taken you DNA signature any time I wanted but that's not my style and I have nothing to fear in this world"
Arkya was taken aback by all this and said, "You are the one who attacked earth, isn't it?"
Zod said, "So you have brains then, okay, I am going to be straight forward with you, I know everything about you, and if you don't give me what I want then I will kill everyone you hold dear"
Arkya punched towards Zod and Zod quickly avoided that and caught his punch easily and said, "Surprised!!! Initially, it took a little more time to adjust but now I am figuring it out, all of your power comes from earth atmosphere, the yellow solar system, ha, ha, now we all are Gods, you can't stop anything this time"
A huge battle was started which was loosing by Arkya as despite his superpower, he wasn't a trained soldier like General Zod.
Arkya lost this battle and said, ", I will never open that mothership, so fuck you"
General Zod said, "Ha, ha, I will take your dead body if that's what needed to be done" in saying this he was beating the shit out of Arkya.
General Zod said, "You are feeling good about yourself, isn't it? Ha, ha, let's see how tough you can be when it comes to others" in saying this he ordered one of his Soldier to bring Sana
Arkya said, "No!! Don't hurt her"
Zod said, "It's up to you"
Arkya said, "Fuck you"
Zod said, "Fuck me???!!! Fuck me???!!! Do you think I won't do it, you idiot..." in saying this he snapped the neck of Sana
Arkya was shocked out of his mind seeing his love's sorry demise
Water was coming down from his eyes, as he shouted with all of his emotions, every part of his body was angry, suddenly, he found himself flying and feeling all kinds of abilities and strength that he never knew existed.
Zod smiled and said, "So we can fly also!!? How wonderful!!! Good for us!!! Ha, ha, don't be so dramatic, just open the mothership"
Arkya attacked Zod with his full might and said, "You monster, you pushed me too far, now you will feel the consequences"
After a huge battle and a lot of destruction in which Arkya completely destroyed the kryptonian spaceship and was winning.
Zod said to his army, "This is no joke, attack him together and hold him down" as they were also adapting to earth's atmosphere and discovering about their new found abilities.
Forty something Kryptonians hold Arkya down and Zod came smiling and came close to him and said, "You idiot, you are not some kind of Superhero to us, we are all kryptonians, we are all Gods here, you thought you can take a whole kryptonian army by yourself, you dumb idiot"
Arkya was like wild animal in a cage, he looked at Zod with tremendous anger and suddenly a ray beam came out of his eyes and damaged Zod's eye.
He flew away holding Zod and came to Konark's temple thinking that when he was last time here, he was feeling weak and uncomfortable, he was hoping for similar things to Zod as well
But in reality, things didn't turn out that way
as quickly Zod's eye was regenerating.
Zod smiled and said with tremendous arrogance, "This is the best you can do, you dumbass, you are going to die today"
Arkya was feeling helpless and weak in Konark's temple but Zod was completely unaffected.
He came to Arkya and took his heart out and said, "You Stupid arrogant fool, you gave your lives for these lesser beings, you deserve to be dead"
As Zod was preparing to use the heart of Arkya to open the mothership by using its DNA signature
Suddenly, he heard a familiar tone, "I think it's time for you to get back wherever the hell you came from"
Zod looked behind and saw Arkya was standing in the air and bright lights were coming out of his body. His eyes were white.
Zod said, "More new powers, I presume, good for us then"
Arkya smiled and said, "I don't think so, monster, you will find this quite surprising" in saying this he moved so fast and snapped Zod's neck and ripped apart every part of Zod's body and looking at Arkya and the horrible demise of Zod, their general, the kryptonian army flew away towards space and Arkya was feeling very tired, he became unconscious
When he woke up, he saw a huge tree like figure standing in front of him and said, "Never use this kind of cosmic power again, it can destroy earth itself, if you do I am going to be standing in your way"
Arkya saw himself in his normal state and asked about his identity
He said, "I am the God of green, I am known as Swamp Thing in the mythology, you attracted my attention as I normally don't concern myself with meta alien superhuman like yourself but you turned out to be quite different than that, you are a demi God, you have Sun God Rao's blood flowing in your vains, I believe you are last sole survival of that bloodline, you activated it's power when you were in Konark's temple, it was where Rao was resting for so many years, you will never use this power again, you could destroy universe with these powers" in saying this Swamp Thing disappeared
As Superman became more and more popular as he not only saved the earth from alien attack but also helped build the cities again and repaired all the damage
Jonardon and Mitali, both said to Arkya, "What are you going to do now, Arkya? Everyone saw your face now, it will be hard for you live now among us"
Arkya smiled and said, "Don't worry, I discovered another power of mine in which I can shape shift my appearance just enough to look completely different from my normal Superman avatar, I will remain in this look as Arkya Sen and when I have to be Superman, I will shape shift myself to my original look, by the way, I am applying for a new intern job in Kolkata in ABP newspaper under Lucy Jain"
Both of them said, "We are giving our blessings, Arkya, not that you needed it, stay safe, we are extremely proud of you, my son"
Arkya said to them, "Your blessings are more valuable to me than Sun God's bloodline, so keep giving me those, I will always be needing those" in saying this he flew away towards big metropolitan City Kolkata.
The End
How do you like this? It's cool if you don't :D

#girlfantasy #Nojotocomedy #RIPStanLee #Nojoto #Pyar #Relationship #Nojotophotography #rain #Nojotodigitalart #Thoughts #Photography #Nojotovideo #shayri #Dil #Se #Nojotoofficial #Fun #Nojotovoice #hindipoetry #poetryinhindi #Nojotoenglish #Nojotohindi #cutefactory #Love #pinkmania #Art #Paint #rain #Gif #RehneDe #feelings #DigitalArt #Movie #Quotes #Sketch #Fitness #lloveyou #BreakUp #HeartBreak #Lovebites #shopholic #narcissistic #jokes #footballjokes #soccer #Sports #CR7 #Notebook #attentionseeker #everreadyforpose #whateverywomanwanttohear #teasingishot #awkwardcoffeedrinking #brainfreeze #whattypeofgirlami #notsayingpeace #notshowingvictrorysign #justsayingcheese #wishhewastgay #casanova #heartstealer #heartcapturer #OmG #promdatecrisis #mymom #Nojotocomedy #letsmakeout #aftergettingdrunk #tomcruise #hotmen #CATchmeifyoucan #50shadesofgrey #runawaybride #hairdyer #CAT #Tennis #Tennisjokes #hotsoccercoach #tastycook #devilsangel #discoveringnewpeaks #Dance #cupcakelove #goingbehindtrainersinstruction #angelwithhorn #whatagirlwishaboutherdog #whatapetdogwish #crazycatlady #whencatcrazebecomeextreme #fashiondesignergonecrazywithanimalright #shiveringwithexcitement #shiveringwithlove #ecentricfashiondesigner #ecentricphotographer #crazycatladygochristmassteroid #whensomeoneisdrunkandhigh #Nojotonews #painofashopholic #beingromantic #hotexpectation #symtomno1marrigeisboundtofail #hotattitude #romanticcouple #cluelesscouple #itsashallowworld
#groomingformen #timetogetserious
#maidofhonour #horriblemusicians #nextdoorgirl #Music #cutegirl #luckyboyfriend #hottestpowerfulcoupleinfiction #Superman #WonderWoman #poemunderthebluesky #petcatlover #morningbirdpoem
#thegirlwhohatesherlife #girlwhothinkseverythingispretty
#twosquirrelandagirl #ryangosling #crazystupidlove #commongirlfantasy #reunionafterbreakup #boyfriendgirlfriendjokes #happydreams #girlsneedchallangeinrelationship #whatgirlssecretlylike #whenyouwanttostayinbedhuggingyourboyfriend #forbiddenlove #extremeattraction #17thcenturyfrenchroyalwedding #WhyamInotfallinginlove
#WhyamInotfindingaboyfriend #spooning #luckyguy #toocute #oneofthoserelationship #horrormovies #Tattoo #nervousconversationalist #awkwardbff #takinginitiative #whenacouplesmellsogood #pillowtalk #chemistry #poorcluelessboyfriend #commontechproblem #extrememutualbreakup #makingfoodsfromcookingshow#coolselfieinthesummer #lackofcommunication #annoyingcouple #idioticphotoshoot #marmaidjokes #weirdestkidsquestion #Seriouslackofcommunication
#IwishIcanbemydog #peerpressure #exhustingwaitforyourcrushtocallyou #Lovetorture #girlsrighttostalkmen #wink #dolphincoupledrama #happyandinlove #girls #girlsquotes #happybirthday #viratkholi #Shiddat #khwaab #Artwork

8 Love

8 Signs He's Terrible And You Should Dump Him
Irrespective of how great the relationship was before, you should always know when it’s time to call it quits. While this may occasionally be because of a fault on one or both of your parts, sometimes it can be just because the relationship has run its course.
Encompassing all of this, here are a few reasons you should dump him:
1.) He couldn’t keep it in his pants.

Source
You will always deserve someone better than a person who cannot be faithful to you. If he doesn’t respect you enough to remain loyal, or call it off before he wanders to other people, you should know that there’s no amount of repeated apologizing that will ever make you truly forgive this violation of your trust. If not calling it off, consider it a strike.
2.) You just don't feel like staying loyal to him.

Source
Things work both ways. Just as you deserve better if he were to cheat, the same goes for him. If you do not believe that the relationship is worth you being faithful, be fair to the both of you, and part ways. Come clean about what you’ve done, if he chooses to forgive you, don’t abuse the trust.
3.) He is ashamed of you.

Source
Anyone who will not be proud, and want to parade you around in front of the world, doesn’t deserve your trust and love. If he makes you his dirty little secret, call it off, it will definitely cause some serious self-esteem issues for you later in life.
4.) You can’t do long distance.

Source
This is contextually based on whether there is a need to, but if there is, make sure that the two of you are confident and stable enough to try it. If not, go your separate ways before arguments and mistrust ruin the entire relationship, friendship included.
5.) He doesn’t even bother prioritizing you.

Source
If it’s his work or his family, cut him a little slack. But if you constantly find him flaking to only ever spend time with his friends, or other girls, confront him about it. If you’re not feeling loved, you really shouldn’t remain in the relationship for too If it’s his work or his family, cut him a little slack. But if you constantly find him flaking to only ever spend time with his friends, or other girls, confront him about it. If you’re not feeling loved, you really shouldn’t remain in the relationship for too long.
6.) He doesn’t want to take things as slowly as you want to.

Source
Every boy, if not person, should always be respectful of your space. If you are not ready for something, emotional or physical, ensure that he doesn’t overstep his bounds. Never be forced into doing something you don’t want to, and if you are, its time you ended things.
7.) He constantly compares you to other people.

Source
If he spends more time pulling you down, then making you feel good about yourself, the solution is pretty obvious. A relationship that survives on such a toxic bond will never last and cause some serious damage to one or both parties involved in it.
8.) It just, doesn’t work.

Source
While you should always put in your 100% and never bail when things get hard, it is equally important to know when the relationship is destined for failure. Don’t try pushing along a failing relationship, and making both of your lives miserable.


Source:
http://www.thatscoop.com/article/gabyextross/dump-him

3 Love

7 Secret Tips to Make Your Relationship Last Longer
There is no elaborate strategy or blueprint to the perfect relationship. In all honestly, all relationships are messy, and they all come with their own share of drama. It is your personal decision to make about whether you chose to work through it, or drop it completely. Make this decision as early in the relationship as possible, this will ensure that minimum damage is caused.
Here are a few secret (but seemingly simple) tips to a long lasting relationship:
1.) Be spontaneous.

Source
At no point in a relationship, should you give up. Keep them on their toes and always try to surprise them. Take random trips, plan crazy dates and take their breath away at every chance you get. Male or female, it is your duty to keep each other happy and interested throughout the relationship. If it’s worth it, put in the effort.
2.) Communicate.

Source
Don’t bottle up your feelings. This might work in the short term, but eventually, you will implode and cause more drama than you can imagine. Tell them if something bothers you, and more importantly if something makes you happy. This will ensure that they know what to avoid doing, and what to do to make your day better.
3.) Hook up.

Source
Don’t underestimate the power of some good between the sheets time. While you should be careful to prevent this from becoming all you do in your relationship, it is important to maintain a healthy balance. Not only is it a great stressbuster, it also gives you the opportunity to try out new and interesting things here too.
4.) Don’t lie.

Source
White lies to prevent drama and hurt are excusable – but do not make it a habit. When you find yourself lying about serious issues, or trying to cover up for yourself, you know you’ve taken it too far. Honesty is of utmost importance in a relationship. Without it, you lose your trust and then there’s no way to save whatever you may have with them.
5.) Don’t overshare.

Source
Don’t talk about sex with your ex, don’t constantly compare them to your past and definitely avoid criticizing them too much. Somethings must be kept to yourself, but do not use this as an excuse to be dishonest and hide the truth from them either.
6.) Be supportive.

Source
Support their dreams. While it is important for you to keep them sane and grounded, do not abuse this power by holding them back. Let them live their lives and fulfil their goals. Your job as their partner is to build them up and help them achieve everything they want. Be sure that this will always be reciprocated.
7.) Don't Judge

Source
Be the person they can come to with their problems. If they’re constantly worried about what you will think of them, or if you will judge them, they will find someone else to confide in. Provide them with a safe and secure environment in which they can share their deepest insecurities and feelings. This will bind you together in an unbreakable hold.


Source:
http://www.thatscoop.com/article/gabyextross/tips-relationship

3 Love