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HAPPY WOMEN'S DAY
We teach girls to shrink themselves, to make themselves smaller. We say to girls, you can have ambition, but not too much. You should aim to be successful, but not too successful. Otherwise, you would threaten the man. Because I am female, I am expected to aspire to marriage. I am expected to make my life choices always keeping in mind that marriage is the most important. Now marriage can be a source of joy and love and mutual support but why do we teach girls to aspire to marriage and we don’t teach boys the same? We raise girls to see each other as competitors not for jobs or accomplishments, which I think can be a good thing, but for the attention of men. We teach girls that they cannot be sexual beings in the way that boys are. Some people ask: “Why the word feminist? Why not just say you are a believer in human rights, or something like that?” Because that would be dishonest. Feminism is, of course, part of human rights in general—but to choose to use the vague expression human rights is to deny the specific and particular problem of gender. It would be a way of pretending that it was not women who have, for centuries, been excluded. It would be a way of denying that the problem of gender targets women. The problem with gender is that it prescribes how we should be rather than recognizing how we are. Imagine how much happier we would be, how much freer to be our true individual selves, if we didn’t have the weight of gender expectations. Culture does not make people. People make culture. If it is true that the full humanity of women is not our culture, then we can and must make it our culture. We spend too much time teaching girls to worry about what boys think of them. But the reverse is not the case. We don’t teach boys to care about being likable. We spend too much time telling girls that they cannot be angry or aggressive or tough, which is bad enough, but then we turn around and either praise or excuse men for the same reasons. All over the world, there are so many magazine articles and books telling women what to do, how to be and not to be, in order to attract or please men. There are far fewer guides for men about pleasing women. I have chosen to no longer be apologetic for my femaleness and my femininity. And I want to be respected in all of my femaleness because I deserve to be. A woman at a certain age who is unmarried, our society teaches her to see it as a deep personal failure. And a man, after a certain age isn’t married, we just think he hasn’t come around to making his pick. We teach girls shame. “Close your legs. Cover yourself.” We make them feel as though being born female they’re already guilty of something. And so, girls grow up to be women who cannot say they have desire. They grow up to be women who silence themselves. They grow up to be women who cannot say what they truly think. And they grow up — and this is the worst thing we do to girls — they grow up to be women who have turned pretense into an art form. Masculinity is a hard, small cage, and we put boys inside this cage. Gender as it functions today is a grave injustice. I am angry. We should all be angry. Anger has a long history of bringing about positive change. But I am also hopeful, because I believe deeply in the ability of human beings to remake themselves for the better. Many acquaintances of mine asked me if I was worried that men would be intimidated by me. I was not worried at all—it had not even occurred to me to be worried, because a man who will be intimidated by me is exactly the kind of man I would have no interest in.
Is Karan Johar right when he said that star kids are better?
No. He is wrong. But the problem is elsewhere.
Let me explain-
See, we are obviously not the richest country in the world.
But that would not have been a problem if we were a sexually liberated society not a conservative one which would allow us to adapt in every level to compete each and every one even without the money. Because then we would not have anything that is blocking us from our psyche.
What is going on at the moment?
We have plenty of good actors from all over India. But most of them do lack in certain areas. Because most of them grew up in a comparatively conservative background compared to this Bollywood kids which means they were always better groomed than rest of us. Even the rich kids of our society is also from a comparatively sexually conservative background compared to the west which is one the reason- anyone from West can sign through in this so called glamour industry way better than us. As they have two advantages over us- money and sexual independence.
So does that mean- these Bollywood kids are some kind of best?
Absolutely fucking not.
Most of them are terrible.
But the reason mentioned above, we can't really push them out of their places just like in western countries. And that is why you see nepotism is prevalent more in Bollywood or rather in India.
Actually nepotism is everywhere but the difference is ordinary people are socially empowered in West not to make it a factor. This is why, you will see that people are competing with everyone in West which is very difficult to do here.
So Karan Johar isn't right when he said that Bollywood kids are better, but it just our society's backdated ideas and thinking process and design are preventing us to bulldoze nepotism.
Let's be honest here - how many of us are really groomed from childhood to take them on? I mean money itself is a factor but it wouldn't have been if as I said it before. I personally don't like Karan Johar but I have to admit one thing that he did try to potray a counter narrative as oppose to the stereotype potrayal of Indians in western movies. But he does it in a very stupid way which is another discussion.
The point is in his mind, he probably only see certain people from certain background meeting that criteria for his movies. Because Bollywood not just a movie industry, it is also a glamour industry as well.
As I said before it could have been challenged then and there if India already was a sexually liberated society.
But the good news is it is becoming like that very very quickly.
Our economy is slowly but surely improving with the help of internet and other technology, Indians are exposed to the world more openly than ever before from the childhood.
I know for a fact our young generation is more sexually adventurous than ever before. We definitely becoming more healthy and good looking than ever before even though our government data may say otherwise. But you know what I am talking about. So the chances are that nepotism won't be that big of factors in Bollywood 7 -10–12 years down the line as things are changing in India in a very rapid rate.
So Karan Johar may still get away saying shit like that but not for very long.
Child Health Tips
Kids who like fruits and vegetables more tend to eat them more frequently and have better diets. It shows that encouraging kids to get involved in meal preparation could be an effective health promotion strategy for parents. Kids are more likely to eat something they are encouraged to prepare. Ask your kids to:
1. Pick a recipe
2. Wash fruits & veggies
3. Toss a salad