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zayn leaves one direction Shayari, Status, Quotes, Stories, Poem

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Never In My Wildest Dreams

You came into my world like high beams on some two lane highway in the middle of a desert night; just as I lost the fight between thirty more miles and pulling over for a nap until sunrise. Fracturing my momentary dream into a million pieces of panic and surprise as your light burned through the lids of my eyes and your horn’s noise grabbed at nerves that shook my insides alive.

I remember the giant halo of your glow and light coming head on, the fog in my brain was overwhelming, as muscle memory spurred both hands and they registered on the wheel. My grasp was wrapped tight and pulled sharply, sending me into a wrenching swerve; a sudden desperate attempt to avoid our impending collision, as you careened head long my way. In the moments that came, I couldn’t tell if you were slowing or attempting to avoid the obstruction of my vehicle that had wondered into your lane. I only knew the fear as my life flashed before my frozen, bulging eyes. I felt my knuckles strain, threatening to rip flesh, as they pulled against the tension of my grasp on the wheel.

I remember feeling my knee slam under the dash as terror took me and I over compensated. With pang in knee, I stabbed my foot back down at the break. I remember the feeling of gravity shift as my vehicle began to swerve and my body flatten into the door panel as I began the fight to regain control of my vehicle, careening down that lonely highway.

I remember my body recognized and felt something I couldn’t have truly felt. At least something felt different, this specific time, than any other before or after. Both the fear of loosing control and this new feeling are forever linked somehow. It was something I felt as my shoulder pressed into the drivers side door panel: the feel of the gravel beneath my tires, not in the normal sense of peeling out, or hot rodding around a turn, or when you are navigating a gravel incline and a tire slips, spinning a bit. But, I remember feeling every, single, piece, of gravel, as my tires slid over them, like they were brail desperately attempting to be read by someone with an untrained hand.

And suddenly, I remember, I was fighting gravity to avoid being thrown into the empty passenger seat next to me; with the dutiful assistance of my seat belt I remained square in seat. By this point my perspiration was beading at my brow and my palms were slick and damp. The smell filling my nose was terrible: rubber skidding across tar and the metal chemical burn of clutch mixed with burning metallic fumes of locked, red hot breaks. The noxious smoke produced from the instant tire tread wear of tires attempting to grapple with the texture of pavement at sixty miles per hour and the dust thrown up from the narrow desert road was thick in the air as my vehicle began to spin violently. This must have been one of my wildest dreams.

Your tail lights passed by my view out the front windshield a few times before I came to a slow, lazy roll backwards, eventually coming to a halt on the pavement; vision now dizzy and disoriented. My motion had not stopped however. The spinning had turned my head into one of those twirling carnival rides and transformed my extremities into shaking nerve noodles, who’s vibration emanated from my core.

Regaining my composure, I found myself immediately worried about who I had almost collided with and what state they were in; my concern seemingly met with reply as your hazard lights lit up from the tail lights of your vehicle ahead. I remember blood pumping in my temples as I raced toward your vehicle, grateful to be alive, and grateful you were still on the road and in one piece as well. Closing the distance to your flashing hazards just hoping you were okay. I felt embarrassed and foolish for putting myself, and you, at risk not stopping a few miles back. I prayed you were not scared or upset with me. Not knowing what to expect as I slowed to a jog nearing your vehicle, I took in the details of the multiple spins my vehicle completed as it whipped round and round directly down the center of the highway. I took in the sight of fresh tread on the pavement left by my tires, scrawled like a signature of some artist signing their work of near miss.

I remember as I looked up again to where your vehicle had come to a stop, that you too where now running my direction. As we approached each other I could tell we both did a quick visual assessment of each other, our vehicles, the tire tread scrawl on the road. We asked each other if the other was okay and learned no harm had come to the other other than shaken nerves and a bit of embarrassment on my part.

I remember hearing your laugh for the first time as we sat on the side of that highway in the middle of the night and lost track of time. We talked about everything, and nothing, as we watched the stars and smiled at each other honestly. Morning came faster than either of us expected announcing it’s a rival gloriously. The sunrise was exceptionally beautiful that morning. As we peacefully watched, finally pausing in conversation for the first time since we met, we took in it’s orange, blue, yellow, and pink shifting colors sharing glances at each other now and then, smiles and blushing cheeks as we did.

As the morning sun’s heat set upon our skin and the brightness of the desert view began to become overwhelming you turned to me with a smile. I remember taking your business card and the electricity fire through my fingertips as our hands touched for the first time.

Your touch felt so exotic then, like some distant land I had read a million books about and knew every detail of but had only learned from in the texts written in those pages. I imagine I looked like an adventurer, captivated and in awe, as they stepped of an old steam engine train onto a new landscape. Amusing the locals watching a new traveler standing starstruck seeing, smelling, and feeling the foreign environment they had read so much about but were only experiencing in person for the first time.

As I put your business card into my wallet, so many unknown feelings and pressing questions that I wanted to ask you were coming to my head fighting each other for place in line and internally pleading for one more second of your time. They were interrupted by one major new question I hadn’t considered so distracted by my internal conflict.

When would I would see you again? This question was followed by an even larger: Would I see you again? I was so caught off guard at their staggering weight I remember feeling intimidated by how much it meant to me. I chickened out. I didn’t ask and though in that moment didn’t know what to do with myself, or my shaken emotions, as we said our good byes.

Before you turned to depart I managed to make sure you too had my number and awkwardly, shuffled back, half facing you, half trying to walk away. I could tell you noticed in the words your smile always seemed to hold.

I remember you driving away and the stress I felt realizing we were going in opposite directions for the first time since we met and how something immediately felt missing in my world. I remember kicking myself not wanting to end up just some guy who you met and called you down the road or being just a story of a time you almost got hit head on by some guy in the middle a desert one night. A bit late, but just in time, I buckled my seat belt and decided not to become that guy. I threw my vehicle in drive and accelerated after you. Headed in your direction for the first time.

My heart raced as I drove fast to catch up to your vehicle once again and as I pulled up behind you, obnoxiously got your attention with my horn and the flashing of my lights. I couldn’t believe I had chased after you like a crazy! What would you think of this? Was I crazy?

As you stepped out of your vehicle your beauty was staggering and I confidently acknowledged, almost applauded myself; I had made the right decision. I jogged up to you on the pavement of that two lane highway and blurted out “When will I see you again?!”. Your laugh told me everything as it often did, I would learn.

I canceling my plans, my new job would have to wait, or I’d find a new one when I got to my destination. I suddenly had you placed at the center of my life’s main screen and didn’t for one second consider what else was on outside in my periphery. Everything seemed like it mattered just a little bit less than the focus my mind found when trained on you. I spent the day with you, headed in your direction. We played, both lost in the world together, on a new adventure, and loving every moment of it.

By that evening I was already in love, and knew it as for the first time I watched the sunset reflect forever in your eyes. I will never in my wildest dreams forget your smile when I admitted my love to you as we watched those stars again, together, that second night.

I also remember how we really met, and this isn’t it! Not even close! But it sure could have been. I mean, some things are similar to how we met all those years ago. You do remember don’t you?

The night we first met we were hurling in each other’s direction at a million miles per hour and barely missed colliding. That near miss put us into permanent dance as we orbited each other - dancing in and out of each other’s life, always friends, lovers, strangers, family; whatever we needed to be for the other at that specific moment in time. The first night we met I knew I had met the most amazing woman and I couldn’t believe that I had finally found you; never in my wildest dreams did I think you were really out there.

We did watch the stars and talked until the sun came up. We also spent the next day playing together and I really did watch the sunset reflect forever in your eyes. I did fall in love with you, only immediately, almost at first sight.

My love switch flipped the very moment you said “Hiiii” that way you did. Your mysterious brown eyes - strands coloring them wonderful, as your cheeks smiled for days. They reached into me latching onto my heart and I did not resist the comfort of your grasp. There was just something so familiar in the way you drew me in and made a place for me in your world. I felt like I had seen this smile of yours before somewhere and it belonged right after that “Hiiii”, and right in front of me. There was also something so familiar in the way you said my name, always smiling, you giggled a lot more back then.

I chased after you and that smile, following the echoes of that giggle from that moment on without any regret and loved every moment you chased me back laughing as we played. I remember how grateful I was getting to know you, and how grateful I always will be to have spent all the moments we shared through the years, building our story. The rest of that story and how we really first met is ours. A story to be remembered another time I think.


I remember the many other things that are similar in the story I have told but happened completely differently, to a completely different moment, in a completely different part of our story that I’d like to share in this letter to you. I think it is supposed to help...telling you these things, we always shared our deepest feelings with each other and It’s hard holding them all by myself. I’m working on it, love, I promised. Writing these letters to you and the chapters of our time together contained within.
In this part of our story, the true part of this story, and part of our chapters I’m sharing in this letter is a moment where I remember a collision that happened head on and it all started with a phone call.

I remember we were both asleep at the wheel and wholly unprepared as I raced down the highway to you. I remember how sudden the impact came after I reached your side. I remember the pain and jarring as your light in my world, that light that engulfed my vision completely, was in a moment no longer present. I remember my confusion as my momentum came to a complete, and immediate, stop. I remember that I didn’t even have time to scream or brace myself as everything in my world shattered in a devastating explosion and all it’s shiny pieces showered into the air around me. I remember that I didn’t even have both hands on the wheel as my life turned upside down. I remember that there was no seat belt to fasten me in as my breath choked in my throat, stalled, as if suspended mid air.

I remember the look, taste, sound, smell, touch, and feeling of every, single, thing, in that hospital room. I remember the smell of my tears in your hair. I remember how soft your skin was and that your fingernails were not painted like they normally were as I held your hand. I remember the feeling of my nerves as they achieved complete pandaemonium within me. I remember I was trembling as I struggled to breath between crying, then breathing, then crying, tasting the snot running from my nose mixed with the salt that clung to my face as I sat at your side. I remember hearing the sobs in the room as your heart rate monitor stopped blinking. I remember that exact moment you left me. I remember all of the feelings I felt at that moment as my emotions burned deep within and imprinted them as if by brand, permanently emblazoned on my soul. I remember not having the words for them then and I still do not have words for them now.

I remember every single detail, reflected in the pieces of my world as they crashed to the polished surface of the tiny room’s grey and white checkered tile floor. I remember that for the first time in a long time we were no longer running toward each other, or in the same direction together, and you weren’t there to make sure I was okay. I remember praying that you would be okay but my heart didn’t hear the echo of yours anymore to be sure. I remember hoping you were not lonely just minutes after you left and began crying: differently, because I didn’t know how to be there for you like I promised I always would be. I remember wanting so badly to chase after you, especially in the months that followed your funeral to keep that promise I made. I remember wanting to make sure you weren’t alone and be by your side as you took off on this new adventure to make sure you got under way okay. I remember trying to lighten my mood and joke about you making a new friend jealous, telling them about a guy that loved you unconditionally in another life. But, I remembered I could not chase you this time; I couldn’t be there to hold you if you happened to fall in love with him and he broke your heart. There was no catching up to you minutes down the road, just to see your smile again and hear you laugh at me for being silly. There was no way to pick you up off the ground and piece your heart back together with pieces of mine if it was broken this time.

I can only hope you receive all the letters like this one and that you are able to answer my call when I get home. We can meet in the middle of some two lane highway in the clouds, talking about life down below, or everything, or nothing, and laugh at the concept of time.

I can’t wait for that moment I see you again and we can remember all the years since the night we first met and remind each other how that story really went. I want so badly to be reminded exactly how it feels seeing the sunset reflect forever in your eyes like I used to.

I remember you every single day and wrote this letter to remind you: that more than anything, I patiently wait to learn how we finish our story, because never in my wildest dreams, could these stars be as beautiful as I remember, all those moments, I spent watching them with you.

10 Love
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2 Years of Nojoto Can you write a patriotic story?

This question was asked to me on Quora which is a social media app for asking questions and getting answers

Read the answer below

PRAKASH:

……………….

Year 1958 somewhere between Peshawar and Rawalpindi in Pakistan-

In some Pakistani school-

“Did you see that triple hundred scored by Hanif Mahamad?”

“Absolutely. He is a God”

“I wish I can bat like him one day”

“Stupid. First you need to register yourself to a cricket coaching camp”

“How do I do that? My father is labourer. He works for Khan saab. My father can't afford that. He barely puts foods on the table. It's a pipe dream which never going to be real”

(Silent crying)

“Don't be sad Prakash. When there's a will there's a way”

Couple of years later in Karachi-

“Alam Sir, I want to play cricket”

“Hmm. What is your name?”

“Prakash Sharma”

“Hindu!!! Wow!! I never thought I would see one in Pakistan!! Why are you people even here? Go back to your fucking Hindustan”

“You mean India!?”

“Yeah, whatever fancy name British gave. It will be always Hindustan to us. The point is Indians can't play cricket. Indians are lazy, idiots and unathletic superstitious dirty people. And you want to be a cricketer?!? Go be cobbler or something. That's more practical. Stupid Hindus”

Poor Prakash was broken hearted. He sat under one tree and cried his heart out.

When he went to his home, he saw his mother was quarreling with his father-

“If you send Asha to marry that bearded mullah. I will kill myself. He is old and already have five wives. Are you even human anymore?”

“You don't understand Shanti, we need money desperately. I can't carry this family anymore. He promised to give me 100 Pakistani rupees. Can you imagine 100 Pakistani rupees!!? That's a lot. They have money. Asha would be all right”

“You are selling your daughter”

“Yeah, what are the our options? No. Tell me Shanti. What is our option? We barely have any Hindus anymore after partion. Those who are here either begging or doing some slave job in Hyderabad. Asha would be okay marrying the Khan saab”

Prakash was already sad. He couldn't take this anymore. He went into his room and shut the door.

5 years later-

One morning-

Prakash was preparing to go in the paddy field as usual. Suddenly, he heard his old mother was crying.

“What happened?”

“They killed Asha. She wasn't young anymore. So they killed her after torturing her for so many years. They even sold her daughter to nearby ‘bayt daeara' (Brothel)”

Poor Prakash was feeling so helpless. He went to that bayt daeara to look for her niece.

But it was already too late. He found out that she was already sold to a Suadi Arabian theatre group. And they already were gone from Pakistan.

Poor Prakash thought at first to kill himself. Then he just bought a cheap wine from local illegal shop and got hammered.

He woke up hearing a lady voice.

“Bastard!! Get the hell out of here. Look he is sleeping here as if he owns the place”

(A lot of lady laughter)

Prakash was hung over from last night so he could barely see what was going on. He got up somehow. His head was still spinning.

He sat beside a nearby tree and again went to sleep. When he woke up, he heard a female crying voice. It was night time. He realised that he slept the whole day.

He went to look for the crying voice. He found one hole in one of the rooms where from the sound was coming. He peeked through the hole and he saw one guy in expensive salwar kameez was beating up one girl. He forced himself onto her.

Prakash could not watch anymore. He puked all over the place.

One hour later-

He again peeked through the hole and saw that the girl was still crying.

“Hey, behan (sister), do you want to get out of here?”

Girl was shocked.

“No. Who are you? Get out of there. If they saw you talking to me, they will kill you”

“Don't worry about me. I am coming from Punjab. I can take you out of here very easily. Now do you want to or not?”

“Why should I trust you? You are peeking through a hole?”

“Let's be honest, how much dangerous I can be, you are already going through hell everyday here”

“I don't know….”

“Don't think, just do it. We don't know when the guards would come back. I can't help you then”

“How do I get out of here?”

“Just jump from the window. I will catch you”

She did and Prakash managed to catch her.

But there was obviously sound. And guards were awakening.

“Come on, we don't have time. Let's run. We have to reach the station before they catch us”

While running both of them were hearing guard's realisation that one of their girl escaped.

They got on one compartment of a train. But the problem was that train wasn't moving.

“Saab, why the train isn't moving”

“Are you not from here? This train takes time to leave the station”

She was scared.

“Guards will be here and they will catch us and kill us”

“Shut up. Don't make any sound. It would be wise not to create any attention towards us”

One longest and insufferable hours passed-

Guards were searching through the station. They were searching all the trains including the one they were on. They were almost about to search their compartment. Both of them were sitting without taking any breath almost.

Suddenly, train started to move and leaved the station.

It was huge relief for both of them. They almost felt as if they were born again.

“What is your name?”

“Nusrat for now”

“What do you mean for now?”

“I was a hindu. They took me from home one night. And from then on I was living in that hell hole. I can't remember my actual name anymore”

“My name is Prakash Sharma. I will call you Archana from now on”

“Okay. Prakash ji. But where are we going?”

“My home”

When they reached their home and talked to Shanti and told her everything-

“What did you do? Now where do I keep her? I understand that you feel bad for the girl. But we can't keep her here. What will the neighbor say? Already there's a lot of social isolation because we are hindu. All kinds of things people say about us every other day. Now you bring her from bayt daeara!! I mean bayt daeara!!! You have lost your head”

“Just look at her eyes, mother. Just look at her innocent eyes and tell me that I didn't do the right thing”

Shanti could not hold herself back looking at sad innocent eyes of Archana. Both of them started to cry on each other shoulder.

Archana stayed there as Prakash's fake wife. Their relationship was just that. They never even spent in one room together.

Few months later-

People started to talk. One hindu nosy neighbour started to suspect something.

One day police came. They started to ask all kinds of questions about Archana.

Prakash managed to convince them otherwise. But police didn't look totally convinced.

Prakash realised that their nosy neighbour did this. When he confronted them about this.

“Sorry, Prakash, we live in good neighborhood. We don't want any unwanted attention here. It is always better to stay the good side of police”

Prakash was about give them his hard piece of mind but then he saw one of the police was talking to one of the guards from that bayt daeara in their police car.

He realised that there was no point arguing.

He came to Shanti and told her everything.

“Oh my god! What do we do now? Your father passed away. We just used to have both of us. Now because of Archana, we about to lose everything”

“I don't see that we have much options, mother. We have to escape to India. That is our only chance”

“What are you saying? How is it possible?”

“I have one friend in Lahore who illegally sell cows to India from border area. He has an understanding with the Pakistani border guards. I believe he can get us passed. We are childhood friend. He won't even take any money from us”

Archana heard everything.

“Thank you so much for everything. But it's time I return back to wherever I came from. I knew this won't last long. I can't put your family though anymore trouble because of me”

“What are you talking about, Archana? I didn't rescue you from that place to further sent you there. No, we are leaving Pakistan. I don't know where we would end up in India. But it would be better than Pakistan any day. I don't want to hear any negetivity from you”

“But why are you taking so many chances because of me? Is only because pity?”

“It was initially like that. But now I can't think my family without you”

“And why is that? What am I to you?”

“Someone close”

“Is that worth to take all this risk?”

“Absolutely”

Shanti was listening to both of their conversation. And last conversation put a smile on her face.

She was thinking, “These two don't even know that they like each other”

That night-

“What is going on, Prakash? Why your whole family is here?”

“Ali bhai, my friend, we are in serious trouble. We need to leave Pakistan immediately. Please help bhai. We will give you everything we have”

“No. No. Money isn't an issue. It's just that there has been more security tightening on the border than before. You know Kashmir issue has made everything more tensed between Hindustan and Pakistan. Cow smuggling is one thing but human!? It's completely different and risky. Let's see what I can do”

“Thank you so much bhai”

In India Pakistan border-

“I just talked to the border guards. They told me we just have one minute. If anyone sees us, we will be shot to death. Sorry, my friend. I can't help more than that”

“You have done so much already. I will always be grateful to you, my friend”

“Hey, you never know I might also settle in India in the future. The way things are regressing in Pakistan. Anything is possible”

“Absolutely, bhai. Absolutely”

All these rush made Shanti's old heart pumping. She realised that she was having heart attack.

“Prakash, you two go. I can't anymore. My heart is in tremendous pain”

“You have given birth to me, mother, I will never leave you. I will carry you on my shoulder, mother. Come quickly Archana”

But the road was too dangerous to carry Shanti. Prakash fall down crossing the border. Suddenly, bullets came flying in like rain.

One of the bullets took the head off Shanti.

Archana was about to shout through sheer shock but Prakash blocked her mouth with his hands and jumped across the border together leaving Shanti's dead body behind.

After getting close to Indian military camp, they both went unconscious because of all the stress and anxiety.

One day later-

Archana woke up.

“You finally woke up. I was starting to get worried. We are safe. I talked to Indian army, they are taking us to Delhi”

One Indian solder came.

“My name is lietenant Saeed Khan of Indian army. I have heard everything from Prakash. You are really brave and extremely lucky to be alive. I just talked my superiors and they have talked to the home minister. You are going to be awarded in Delhi. Your stories are all over the newspapers. Everyone is cheering your name in India. Wait for a big welcome in Delhi”

Prakash said, “Thank you so much Saab but we just want some peace and quiet place to stay.”

…………………………………………………………………………

Mordern day some where in India-

A laud cheer was going on in the press conference

One journalist asked, “Mr Rahul Sharma, today you are the captain of Indian cricket team. Best cricketer in the whole world. Some are even saying that you are the all time best ever. You are the most popular cricketer today. Yet we didn't know anything about your family past. How did you manage to keep this tragic yet such interesting past secret?”

Rahul Sharma replied, “I also didn't know anything about my great grandfather Prakash Sharma's struggle. Until few years ago in our old house I found the diary of my grand father's father who wrote this after hearing from his mother Archana Sharma. I then decided to publish this book. I had to share this with everyone”

(Another loud clapping sound was going on)

THE END

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6 Love

PRAKASH:

……………….

Year 1958 somewhere between Peshawar and Rawalpindi in Pakistan-

In some Pakistani school-

“Did you see that triple hundred scored by Hanif Mahamad?”

“Absolutely. He is a God”

“I wish I can bat like him one day”

“Stupid. First you need to register yourself to a cricket coaching camp”

“How do I do that? My father is labourer. He works for Khan saab. My father can't afford that. He barely puts foods on the table. It's a pipe dream which never going to be real”

(Silent crying)

“Don't be sad Prakash. When there's a will there's a way”

Couple of years later in Karachi-

“Alam Sir, I want to play cricket”

“Hmm. What is your name?”

“Prakash Sharma”

“Hindu!!! Wow!! I never thought I would see one in Pakistan!! Why are you people even here? Go back to your fucking Hindustan”

“You mean India!?”

“Yeah, whatever fancy name British gave. It will be always Hindustan to us. The point is Indians can't play cricket. Indians are lazy, idiots and unathletic superstitious dirty people. And you want to be a cricketer?!? Go be cobbler or something. That's more practical. Stupid Hindus”

Poor Prakash was broken hearted. He sat under one tree and cried his heart out.

When he went to his home, he saw his mother was quarreling with his father-

“If you send Asha to marry that bearded mullah. I will kill myself. He is old and already have five wives. Are you even human anymore?”

“You don't understand Shanti, we need money desperately. I can't carry this family anymore. He promised to give me 100 Pakistani rupees. Can you imagine 100 Pakistani rupees!!? That's a lot. They have money. Asha would be all right”

“You are selling your daughter”

“Yeah, what are the our options? No. Tell me Shanti. What is our option? We barely have any Hindus anymore after partion. Those who are here either begging or doing some slave job in Hyderabad. Asha would be okay marrying the Khan saab”

Prakash was already sad. He couldn't take this anymore. He went into his room and shut the door.

5 years later-

One morning-

Prakash was preparing to go in the paddy field as usual. Suddenly, he heard his old mother was crying.

“What happened?”

“They killed Asha. She wasn't young anymore. So they killed her after torturing her for so many years. They even sold her daughter to nearby ‘bayt daeara' (Brothel)”

Poor Prakash was feeling so helpless. He went to that bayt daeara to look for her niece.

But it was already too late. He found out that she was already sold to a Suadi Arabian theatre group. And they already were gone from Pakistan.

Poor Prakash thought at first to kill himself. Then he just bought a cheap wine from local illegal shop and got hammered.

He woke up hearing a lady voice.

“Bastard!! Get the hell out of here. Look he is sleeping here as if he owns the place”

(A lot of lady laughter)

Prakash was hung over from last night so he could barely see what was going on. He got up somehow. His head was still spinning.

He sat beside a nearby tree and again went to sleep. When he woke up, he heard a female crying voice. It was night time. He realised that he slept the whole day.

He went to look for the crying voice. He found one hole in one of the rooms where from the sound was coming. He peeked through the hole and he saw one guy in expensive salwar kameez was beating up one girl. He forced himself onto her.

Prakash could not watch anymore. He puked all over the place.

One hour later-

He again peeked through the hole and saw that the girl was still crying.

“Hey, behan (sister), do you want to get out of here?”

Girl was shocked.

“No. Who are you? Get out of there. If they saw you talking to me, they will kill you”

“Don't worry about me. I am coming from Punjab. I can take you out of here very easily. Now do you want to or not?”

“Why should I trust you? You are peeking through a hole?”

“Let's be honest, how much dangerous I can be, you are already going through hell everyday here”

“I don't know….”

“Don't think, just do it. We don't know when the guards would come back. I can't help you then”

“How do I get out of here?”

“Just jump from the window. I will catch you”

She did and Prakash managed to catch her.

But there was obviously sound. And guards were awakening.

“Come on, we don't have time. Let's run. We have to reach the station before they catch us”

While running both of them were hearing guard's realisation that one of their girl escaped.

They got on one compartment of a train. But the problem was that train wasn't moving.

“Saab, why the train isn't moving”

“Are you not from here? This train takes time to leave the station”

She was scared.

“Guards will be here and they will catch us and kill us”

“Shut up. Don't make any sound. It would be wise not to create any attention towards us”

One longest and insufferable hours passed-

Guards were searching through the station. They were searching all the trains including the one they were on. They were almost about to search their compartment. Both of them were sitting without taking any breath almost.

Suddenly, train started to move and leaved the station.

It was huge relief for both of them. They almost felt as if they were born again.

“What is your name?”

“Nusrat for now”

“What do you mean for now?”

“I was a hindu. They took me from home one night. And from then on I was living in that hell hole. I can't remember my actual name anymore”

“My name is Prakash Sharma. I will call you Archana from now on”

“Okay. Prakash ji. But where are we going?”

“My home”

When they reached their home and talked to Shanti and told her everything-

“What did you do? Now where do I keep her? I understand that you feel bad for the girl. But we can't keep her here. What will the neighbor say? Already there's a lot of social isolation because we are hindu. All kinds of things people say about us every other day. Now you bring her from bayt daeara!! I mean bayt daeara!!! You have lost your head”

“Just look at her eyes, mother. Just look at her innocent eyes and tell me that I didn't do the right thing”

Shanti could not hold herself back looking at sad innocent eyes of Archana. Both of them started to cry on each other shoulder.

Archana stayed there as Prakash's fake wife. Their relationship was just that. They never even spent in one room together.

Few months later-

People started to talk. One hindu nosy neighbour started to suspect something.

One day police came. They started to ask all kinds of questions about Archana.

Prakash managed to convince them otherwise. But police didn't look totally convinced.

Prakash realised that their nosy neighbour did this. When he confronted them about this.

“Sorry, Prakash, we live in good neighborhood. We don't want any unwanted attention here. It is always better to stay the good side of police”

Prakash was about give them his hard piece of mind but then he saw one of the police was talking to one of the guards from that bayt daeara in their police car.

He realised that there was no point arguing.

He came to Shanti and told her everything.

“Oh my god! What do we do now? Your father passed away. We just used to have both of us. Now because of Archana, we about to lose everything”

“I don't see that we have much options, mother. We have to escape to India. That is our only chance”

“What are you saying? How is it possible?”

“I have one friend in Lahore who illegally sell cows to India from border area. He has an understanding with the Pakistani border guards. I believe he can get us passed. We are childhood friend. He won't even take any money from us”

Archana heard everything.

“Thank you so much for everything. But it's time I return back to wherever I came from. I knew this won't last long. I can't put your family though anymore trouble because of me”

“What are you talking about, Archana? I didn't rescue you from that place to further sent you there. No, we are leaving Pakistan. I don't know where we would end up in India. But it would be better than Pakistan any day. I don't want to hear any negetivity from you”

“But why are you taking so many chances because of me? Is only because pity?”

“It was initially like that. But now I can't think my family without you”

“And why is that? What am I to you?”

“Someone close”

“Is that worth to take all this risk?”

“Absolutely”

Shanti was listening to both of their conversation. And last conversation put a smile on her face.

She was thinking, “These two don't even know that they like each other”

That night-

“What is going on, Prakash? Why your whole family is here?”

“Ali bhai, my friend, we are in serious trouble. We need to leave Pakistan immediately. Please help bhai. We will give you everything we have”

“No. No. Money isn't an issue. It's just that there has been more security tightening on the border than before. You know Kashmir issue has made everything more tensed between Hindustan and Pakistan. Cow smuggling is one thing but human!? It's completely different and risky. Let's see what I can do”

“Thank you so much bhai”

In India Pakistan border-

“I just talked to the border guards. They told me we just have one minute. If anyone sees us, we will be shot to death. Sorry, my friend. I can't help more than that”

“You have done so much already. I will always be grateful to you, my friend”

“Hey, you never know I might also settle in India in the future. The way things are regressing in Pakistan. Anything is possible”

“Absolutely, bhai. Absolutely”

All these rush made Shanti's old heart pumping. She realised that she was having heart attack.

“Prakash, you two go. I can't anymore. My heart is in tremendous pain”

“You have given birth to me, mother, I will never leave you. I will carry you on my shoulder, mother. Come quickly Archana”

But the road was too dangerous to carry Shanti. Prakash fall down crossing the border. Suddenly, bullets came flying in like rain.

One of the bullets took the head off Shanti.

Archana was about to shout through sheer shock but Prakash blocked her mouth with his hands and jumped across the border together leaving Shanti's dead body behind.

After getting close to Indian military camp, they both went unconscious because of all the stress and anxiety.

One day later-

Archana woke up.

“You finally woke up. I was starting to get worried. We are safe. I talked to Indian army, they are taking us to Delhi”

One Indian solder came.

“My name is lietenant Saeed Khan of Indian army. I have heard everything from Prakash. You are really brave and extremely lucky to be alive. I just talked my superiors and they have talked to the home minister. You are going to be awarded in Delhi. Your stories are all over the newspapers. Everyone is cheering your name in India. Wait for a big welcome in Delhi”

Prakash said, “Thank you so much Saab but we just want some peace and quiet place to stay.”

…………………………………………………………………………

Mordern day some where in India-

A laud cheer was going on in the press conference

One journalist asked, “Mr Rahul Sharma, today you are the captain of Indian cricket team. Best cricketer in the whole world. Some are even saying that you are the all time best ever. You are the most popular cricketer today. Yet we didn't know anything about your family past. How did you manage to keep this tragic yet such interesting past secret?”

Rahul Sharma replied, “I also didn't know anything about my great grandfather Prakash Sharma's struggle. Until few years ago in our old house I found the diary of my grand father's father who wrote this after hearing from his mother Archana Sharma. I then decided to publish this book. I had to share this with everyone”

(Another loud clapping sound was going on)

THE END

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3 Love

Gita on Character Building
Human body is only for attaining God (Paramatma). etc. Therefore, if one becomes determinate on the one aim of God Realization, then man will turn towards God. On turning towards God, good qualities-good conduct come on their own, and character building begins to take place. However, if man forgets about God Realization, and begins to hoard worldly possessions and enjoy sense pleasures, then he falls down in character. He who loses his character, is not even worthy and deserving of being called a man.“Par drohee par daar rat par dhan par apabaad |Te nar paanvar paapamai deha dhare manujaad ||(Manas 7/39)Bhagavad Gita’s entire spiritual instructions are for building character. Previously, Arjuna’s sentiment was to fight the war, therefore he invited Lord and accepted Him in the form of a charioteer and became ready to enter the battlefield to fight. However, Lord’s intent was to see to Arjuna’s eternal good (salvation). Arjuna said that place the chariot in-between both the armies so that I can see who is present to fight me with both hands. The Lord, did exactly as told and placed the chariot right in between both the armies and said, that see the members of the Kuru dynasty (1/21-25). On hearing the word, Kuru dynasty, Arjuna suddenly became conscious of his family, affiliated with his body. He became frightened by the thought that all of them will die and thus turning away from his duty, said – I will not fight. To turn away from one’s duty is the main obstacle in character building. The Lord said – O’ What are you doing? It is your duty to fight, therefore giving up attachment and cowardliness, stand up to fight (Gita 2/2-3).It is only to engage man in the path of duty that Bhagavad Gita manifested. It is only in renouncing your rights and properly performing your duties that character is developed, whereas on neglecting your duties the character is destroyed. God says – “Na tvevaaham jaatu naasam….” (Gita 2/12) - Here the Lord begins His spiritual instructions and first deliberates on the body and the indweller, the perishable and imperishable. The point is that leaving aside (not paying attention to) the perishable things, pay attention to the imperishable. By doing so, character building takes place.There is one very important point, that when the aim is of the imperishable, the perishable things will come on their own. You will not have to undergo suffering for them. But if the aim and focus is of the perishable, the imperishable essence will not be attained, and one will have to worry and make an effort for the perishable. And further ahead Lord says, that see toward one’s innate duty, therefore it is only beneficial to fight the war of righteousness for a Kshatriya. (Gita 2/31). The point is that it is only by fulfilling duty that man progresses, and by going towards non-duty he takes a fall. The main thing in fulfilling one’s duty, is to renounce desires, proprietary interest and attachment. The meaning of renouncing these is that one should not have the aim of “jada”, the inert (insentient). Previously the body etc. were not ours, later on as well, they will not remain ours and at present too they are separating from us every single moment. If this kind of alertness is awakened then the aim will not be of the inert and the senses, the inner faculties will be restrained and controlled on their own. In self-control itself is the building of character. In lack of control and lack of restraint, progress is curtailed and with that the character falls.In the beginning of the third Chapter, Arjuna asks that why are you engaging me in these most sinful acts? Lord says – though these appear to be very sinful on the surface, than too one must fulfill their duties by giving up selfishness, proprietary interest, egoism, and desires. By doing so, the dreadfulness does not remain, only the action remains. Actions can be various according to one’s varna (order of life) and ashram (stage in life), but the terribleness, the filth, the passion , all lead to one’s downfall, and it arises due to desires. Keeping desires in the forefront if one reads and shares with others the spiritual messages (with the aim of money or other things), it is considered demoniac tendency and one cannot escape sins; even on listening and sharing spiritual truths, good character cannot be developed because desire is the root of all sins (Gita 3/37). However, if the aim is God, then even though engaged in worldly duties and activities, then too good character will come in them. Therefore, in the third chapter, Lord gives great emphasis on renouncing desires and doing one’s duty. Similarly, in the fourth chapter it has been said that when there is no desires, when there is no sense of pride in doership, then all actions become inactions, in other words, even while doing karma, man is not bound; because his aim is to go towards God. In the fifth chapter also says to fulfill one’s duty -Yuktah karmaphalam tyaktvaa shanatimaanoti naishthikim |Ayuktah kaamkaarena phale sakto nibhadhyate || (Gita 5/12)“He who is a Karmayogi, who by abandoning attachment to the fruit of action, attains everlasting peace (God Realization); whereas, he who acts with a selfish motive, being attached to the fruit of actions through desire acquires bondage.” Fruits (objects) are the kind that will be born and will later perish, but the desire for them is what is binding. Desire makes one fall in character. When character takes a fall, there is lack of peace and whereas building character, one attains peace. The moment there is ill feelings in the mind, one experiences lack of peace. And the moment there is good feelings within, peace immediately follows.If you are attentive, then it is every man’s experience that the more that he renounces the perishable, that much peace, joy, equanimity, good qualities, continue to come in him and the more that he desires the perishable things, that much lack of peace, discord, anguish, burning infliction, and bad qualities arise.In the sixth chapter also, it has been said to engage in God having “That” as the aim. That God is present and pervading everywhere. He who sees Me (the Universal Self, God) present in all beings and sees all beings existing in Me (Paramatma), I am never out of sight for him, nor is he ever out of my sight.Yo maam paschyati sarvatra sarvam cha mayi pashyatiTasyaahum na pranashyaami sa cha mein na pranashyati || (Gita 6/30)That man who sees other’s sorrow and happiness as his own happiness and sorrow, he is an eternal yogi -Aatmoupamyena sarvatra samam pashyati yorjuna |Sukham va yadi vaa dukham sa yogi paramo matah || (Gita 6/32)He who has the sentiments - Let there be no sorrow such a one attains God (Paramatma tattva). How can the suffering of all come to an end? How can all be happy? One who has such sentiments - their character is the highest of all. Further when the conversation lead to bringing the mind under control, then the Lord revealed about study and practice “abhyaas” and detachment “vairaag” (Gita 6/35). In other words, there too the talks are about removing the mind from the world, and engaging it in God. When talking about progress in the life beyond this world, there too the same has been intellect is only in God, he is considered the best among the yogis (Gita 6/47). He who walks the path of God, if his spiritual practices comes to an end in the middle and he dies then too he will be benefited, he will attain misfortune (Gita 6/40). Those who do work for the welfare of all, even if their work is left incomplete, he will be benefited. He whose mind and It is only eminent to be engaged in God.He who is not devoted to God, God calls him an evil doer (Gita 7/15) and he who is devoted to God, he is called virtuous (Gita 7/16). The point is that he who walks the path towards God are called virtuous and benevolent, and he who walks the path of the world is called an evil-doer. Further ahead it is said that he whose actions are pure, whose character is great, they become unyielding in their spiritual pursuits and do worship and devotion of God (Gita 7/28).
In walking the path towards God, remembrance is the key point. In the beginning of the Eight Chapter, on questioning by Arjuna, the Lord said that he who leaves this body while remembering Me, he attains Me - of this there is no doubt. (Gita 8/5).
Because whatever the sentiments and feelings that are recollected at the time of leaving the body, that alone he attains. (Gita 8/6) Therefore God says, that keep in mind and remember Me at all times - “Sarveshu kaaleshu Maamanusmara” (Gita 8/7). Then God said something extra-ordinary that he who remembers Me at all times, for him I am easily attainable.
Anayacheta satatam yo maam smarati nityasah |
Tasyaham sulabh paarth nitya yuktasya yoginah || (Gita 8/14)
To remember God is a divine trait. It is innateness the root of good character. The meaning of being in remembrance of God is - that remembering and recollecting the innate relation that we have with God, that very relationship, is the one only real relationship. I do not have a relationship with the world. I have only assumed a relationship with the world, therefore this relationship does not last. It is clearly seen that the relationships we have in this birth, they were not there in the previous birth, and they will not be there in the next birth. In the same way this world is constantly changing, but God is the same, as Is, and I myself am also the same. Therefore my relationship with Paramatma is eternal. Remembering this itself is recollection and remembrance (smruti). Thinking can also be of the world, but “smruti” can only be of God. On having such recollection and remembrance, good character is axiomatic.
He who is inclined towards God, becomes the best of all. There is greater gains among those who walk the path of God with aim of God, than the gains that come from Vedas (holy texts), sacrifice, austerities, charity, visiting holy places, fasting etc. (Gita 8/28).
Therefore inclination towards God is considered to to be the sovereign of sciences (king of all knowledge), most mysterious, supremely holy, most excellent, directly realizable, endowed with virtues, very easy to practice and imperishable (Gita 9/2). God finds Himself to be so easy to attain, that “he who with devotion offers a leaf, a flower, a fruit, water etc. I partake in that thing., (Gita 9/26). Therefore, whatever you do, whatever you eat, whatever you offer in sacrifice (yajna), whateer you bestow as a gift, whatever you do by way of penance, dedicate it all to Me, then you will be freed from bondage of actions having good and bad results; and freed from them you yourself having completely surrendered shall attain Me (Gita 9/27 – 28).
Whether a man is evil or good – he must not worry. The main point is that that he is engaged in God. On becoming engaged in God, his bad conduct cannot last. He can very quickly become righteous and he attains eternal peace (Gita 9/30-31) . Women folks, Vaisyas, Sudras, and even those that are born of sinful wombs taking refuge in Me, attain the Supreme God. (Gita 9/32-33). However many different “jaatis” that are present, of these externally there is the separation due to nature, but from within all are a part of God. Therefore in worldly relations, the importance is of conducting one’s self according to one’s “Varna,” but in the path of spirituality, there is no importance of “varna” etc. because in the form of divinity (being a part of God), every one’s true nature is pure and all are equally entitled to God. God says, that “Fix your mind on Me, be devoted to Me, adore Me, prostrate to Me, thus making yourself steadfast in Me, and entirely surrendering to Me, you will reach Me.” (Gita 9/34). The point of all this is that only be engaged in Me.
In the tenth chapter on Arjuna’s pleading, God described His super human powers and His Universal form. The essence of what He said - “I am all pervasive in the World. Wherever you see something extra-ordinary, (glorious, brilliant, powerful), know it to be a manifestation of a spark of My splendor” (Gita 10/41). That specialty is due to Me alone. The point is that wherever whatever you find brilliant, abundant, remarkable, there too, the sight should turn towards God. There after he says “what is the reason for you to gain detailed knowledge? I stand supporting the entire Universe, with a single fragment of Myself.” (Gita 10/42) On hearing this, Arjuna, desired to see that Universal Form of the Lord, in Whose single fragment is the entire Universe. The Lord bestowed Arjuna with “divya chakshu” (special divine vision) to behold this sight. * On seeing the divine vision, Arjuna became perplexed, became filled with fear, became charmed. Then God said that this is your foolishness. I am the same One, then why are you fearful?
In the twelfth Chapter, Arjuna asked “he who worships the Imperishable and the Unmanifest and he who worships God with attributes (bhaktimarg), which of the two are better versed in yoga? (Gita 12/1). The path of the Imperishable, Unmanifest (jnana marg), are using their own effort, but in the path of “bhakti” the dependence is on only God. In the path of the Imperishable, divine attributes, discrimination and detachment etc. have to be acquired, but in the path of devotion, on taking refuge in the Lord, divine qualities, good attributes and conduct are automatically and naturally acquired (Gita 12/7). Therefore God says that “you give your mind and intellect to Me alone, there upon you will live in Me alone.” (Gita 12/8). God says - the devotee who is living in Me alone, is most dear to Me. As such, all the beings are dear to God, but he who takes refuge in God, he is most dear to God. Simply by being devoted and engrossed in God, good qualities and conduct come on its own, without any effort.
In the thirteenth Chapter, God describes the path of knowledge (of the Imperishable), and while he describes good qualities such as “absence of pride” (amaanitva) etc., he brings up “Unswerving Devotion to Me with sole dependence on Me alone” – ”Mayi chaananyayogen bhaktiravyabhichaarini” (Gita 13/10). In the Fourteenth Chapter also there is talks about devotion “bhakti” - “He who worships Me with unadulterated devotion, rises above the three modes and becomes eligible, for attaining Brahma”. (Gita 14/26). It is only due to affinity with attributes (gunas) that demonaic traits are born, due to which births in higher and lower forms take place. On walking the path of Divinity (God), one rises above the three modes.
In the fifteenth chapter God reveals His extra-ordinary glories and radiance and says that I am the Supreme Personality (Supreme Soul) over both the “Insentient” (Perishable) and “Sentient” (Imperishable Embodied Soul). (Gita 15/16-18). He who knows Me as the Supreme Personality, the Highest Person, is “sarvavid” the knower of all, and he worships Me, with all his being. (Gita 15/19). Divine traits naturally manifest in him who is devoted to Me and worships Me. Therefore in Sixteenth Chapter, God gives the description of “Divine Traits”. But, he who has become distant from God, who only wants to nourish his own body, to engage in sense enjoyments and in hoarding, demoniac tendencies manifest in him. God elaborates at great length those demoniac traits in the Sixteenth Chapter. He says, Divine traits leads to liberation, whereas Demoniac traits lead to bondage. (Gita 16/5), and such a person attains birth through 8.4 million different wombs (Gita 16/19) and goes to hell. (Gita 16/20).
In the Seventeenth Chapter, the Lord describes the three modes - of goodness (sattvic), passion (rajasic) and ignorance (tamasic). Even on seeing this, the goodness and divine sentiments are among those that have a disinclination for the world and inclination towards God. They rise above the sentiments of passion and ignorance. Thus those who perform the acts of sacrifice, penance and various acts of charity for God, then such acts are of the mode of goodness and they are liberating. (Gita 17/25). However if they are done for the world, i.e. with aim of honor, fame, pleasure, rest and relaxation etc. and sacrifices, austerities, charity etc. done with negligence and ignorance, then they become of the mode of passion and ignorance.
In the Eighteenth chapter, God elaborates in great detail, Sanyaas (Sankhyayoga) and “tyaag” (Karmayog). In the end God concludes that leave dependency of all dharmas, and only take refuge in Me.
“Sarvadharmaan parityajya maamekum sharanam vraja |
Aham tvaa sarvapaapebhyo Mokshayishyami maa suchah || (Gita 18/66)
All the work in the world, all accomplishments, all progress, all is encompassed in that one – “sharanagati” (taking refuge in the Lord”. God says that all the sins that are there, evil qualities and conduct, I will free you from these. You do not worry. By My grace, the divine traits will come naturally, on their own.
Just as a child that stays in his mother’s lap, gets provided for, is nourished, taken care of and he grows, similarly, on taking the refuge in the Lord, all the good traits and conduct will come unknowingly. Building of character will take place on its own.
In this manner, in the entire Gita if one sees then there is only one point - walking the path towards God, i.e. becoming inclined towards God. The aim of going towards the Lord is itself an aid in preventing the fall of one’s character. All evil qualities and conduct come from desire for sense pleasures and hoarding. Of this, the importance of money and dependence on it, leads to the worst downfall. By this, man’s character goes down. When character takes a fall, people talk ill of him and he is dishonored.
A man who has fallen in character, he is lower than even animal and those dwelling in hell; because animal and hellish ones are suffering the consequences of their past actions, and are moving towards human birth, but by incurring sins, a characterless man, is moving towards animal life and hell! Association of such men is the kind that will lead to downfall. Therefore it is said -
Baru bhal baas narak kar taataa |
Dusht sang jani deyi bidhaataa || (Manas 5/46/4)
Therefore for improving your character, become inclined towards God, that is – I am God’s and God is mine. I am not this world’s, the world is not mine.
The mistake that man makes is that which is not his, those thing that belong to the world, he considers them as his own, and that which is actually his, i.e. God, he does not accept as his own. As such, if it is seen, the things of the world are his only for proper use. But for himself, God is his very own. Because the things belong to the world, therefore they have to be offered to the world for serving and man himself is God’s, therefore he must surrender himself to God. Neither he has to take anything from the world, nor does he have anything to take from God. If something is to be taken, then let that be God Himself.
By desiring things of the world, one establishes a relationship with the world. Desire arises from attachment, i.e. desire arises by considering the body, wife, son, wealth, etc. as mine. Now if we think and accept the body, wife, son, wealth etc. as our own, can we say we have an independent right over them? Can we keep them as long as we like? Can we stay with them forever? If the answer is No! Than what is the difficulty in getting rid of the sense of mine-ness? By leaving the erroneously accepted sense of mine, desires will not arise. When desires do not arise, automatically there will be a feeling of mine-ness with God; because God is eternally ours from time immemorial and God is ever-attained. On having sense of mine-ness with God, feelings and conduct will be purified.
Body, wife, son, wealth, house, various possessions, are they real or unreal – this doubt may arise, but our relationship with them is unreal, of this there is no possibility of doubt at all. On knowing the unreal as unreal, the unreal relation is renounced very easily and on becoming inclined towards God, the eternal relationship with God is automatically awakened. Thereafter good character and conduct comes on its own and man becomes a role-model of good character, in other words, his character becomes one that is worthy of respect.
Yadyadaacharati shreshthasttdevetaro janah |
Sa yatpramaanam kurute lokastdanuvartate ||
(Gita 3/21)
Whatever an ideal person does, he is followed by others, as well. Whatever standard he sets, the world follows the same.”
A person of good character is never dependent. An ideal person is entirely independent, capable, eligible and entitled.
Narayana ! Narayana !! Narayana !!!
From "Kalyaan Path" in Hindi by Swami Ramsukhdasji

3 Love

zayn malik sketch
zayn malik sketch by me
#Sketch
#Sketching
#Zayn
#icarusfalls #nojotophoto

6 Love

Never In My Wildest Dreams

You came into my world like high beams on some two lane highway in the middle of a desert night; just as I lost the fight between thirty more miles and pulling over for a nap until sunrise. Fracturing my momentary dream into a million pieces of panic and surprise as your light burned through the lids of my eyes and your horn’s noise grabbed at nerves that shook my insides alive.

I remember the giant halo of your glow and light coming head on, the fog in my brain was overwhelming, as muscle memory spurred both hands and they registered on the wheel. My grasp was wrapped tight and pulled sharply, sending me into a wrenching swerve; a sudden desperate attempt to avoid our impending collision, as you careened head long my way. In the moments that came, I couldn’t tell if you were slowing or attempting to avoid the obstruction of my vehicle that had wondered into your lane. I only knew the fear as my life flashed before my frozen, bulging eyes. I felt my knuckles strain, threatening to rip flesh, as they pulled against the tension of my grasp on the wheel.

I remember feeling my knee slam under the dash as terror took me and I over compensated. With pang in knee, I stabbed my foot back down at the break. I remember the feeling of gravity shift as my vehicle began to swerve and my body flatten into the door panel as I began the fight to regain control of my vehicle, careening down that lonely highway.

I remember my body recognized and felt something I couldn’t have truly felt. At least something felt different, this specific time, than any other before or after. Both the fear of loosing control and this new feeling are forever linked somehow. It was something I felt as my shoulder pressed into the drivers side door panel: the feel of the gravel beneath my tires, not in the normal sense of peeling out, or hot rodding around a turn, or when you are navigating a gravel incline and a tire slips, spinning a bit. But, I remember feeling every, single, piece, of gravel, as my tires slid over them, like they were brail desperately attempting to be read by someone with an untrained hand.

And suddenly, I remember, I was fighting gravity to avoid being thrown into the empty passenger seat next to me; with the dutiful assistance of my seat belt I remained square in seat. By this point my perspiration was beading at my brow and my palms were slick and damp. The smell filling my nose was terrible: rubber skidding across tar and the metal chemical burn of clutch mixed with burning metallic fumes of locked, red hot breaks. The noxious smoke produced from the instant tire tread wear of tires attempting to grapple with the texture of pavement at sixty miles per hour and the dust thrown up from the narrow desert road was thick in the air as my vehicle began to spin violently. This must have been one of my wildest dreams.

Your tail lights passed by my view out the front windshield a few times before I came to a slow, lazy roll backwards, eventually coming to a halt on the pavement; vision now dizzy and disoriented. My motion had not stopped however. The spinning had turned my head into one of those twirling carnival rides and transformed my extremities into shaking nerve noodles, who’s vibration emanated from my core.

Regaining my composure, I found myself immediately worried about who I had almost collided with and what state they were in; my concern seemingly met with reply as your hazard lights lit up from the tail lights of your vehicle ahead. I remember blood pumping in my temples as I raced toward your vehicle, grateful to be alive, and grateful you were still on the road and in one piece as well. Closing the distance to your flashing hazards just hoping you were okay. I felt embarrassed and foolish for putting myself, and you, at risk not stopping a few miles back. I prayed you were not scared or upset with me. Not knowing what to expect as I slowed to a jog nearing your vehicle, I took in the details of the multiple spins my vehicle completed as it whipped round and round directly down the center of the highway. I took in the sight of fresh tread on the pavement left by my tires, scrawled like a signature of some artist signing their work of near miss.

I remember as I looked up again to where your vehicle had come to a stop, that you too where now running my direction. As we approached each other I could tell we both did a quick visual assessment of each other, our vehicles, the tire tread scrawl on the road. We asked each other if the other was okay and learned no harm had come to the other other than shaken nerves and a bit of embarrassment on my part.

I remember hearing your laugh for the first time as we sat on the side of that highway in the middle of the night and lost track of time. We talked about everything, and nothing, as we watched the stars and smiled at each other honestly. Morning came faster than either of us expected announcing it’s a rival gloriously. The sunrise was exceptionally beautiful that morning. As we peacefully watched, finally pausing in conversation for the first time since we met, we took in it’s orange, blue, yellow, and pink shifting colors sharing glances at each other now and then, smiles and blushing cheeks as we did.

As the morning sun’s heat set upon our skin and the brightness of the desert view began to become overwhelming you turned to me with a smile. I remember taking your business card and the electricity fire through my fingertips as our hands touched for the first time.

Your touch felt so exotic then, like some distant land I had read a million books about and knew every detail of but had only learned from in the texts written in those pages. I imagine I looked like an adventurer, captivated and in awe, as they stepped of an old steam engine train onto a new landscape. Amusing the locals watching a new traveler standing starstruck seeing, smelling, and feeling the foreign environment they had read so much about but were only experiencing in person for the first time.

As I put your business card into my wallet, so many unknown feelings and pressing questions that I wanted to ask you were coming to my head fighting each other for place in line and internally pleading for one more second of your time. They were interrupted by one major new question I hadn’t considered so distracted by my internal conflict.

When would I would see you again? This question was followed by an even larger: Would I see you again? I was so caught off guard at their staggering weight I remember feeling intimidated by how much it meant to me. I chickened out. I didn’t ask and though in that moment didn’t know what to do with myself, or my shaken emotions, as we said our good byes.

Before you turned to depart I managed to make sure you too had my number and awkwardly, shuffled back, half facing you, half trying to walk away. I could tell you noticed in the words your smile always seemed to hold.

I remember you driving away and the stress I felt realizing we were going in opposite directions for the first time since we met and how something immediately felt missing in my world. I remember kicking myself not wanting to end up just some guy who you met and called you down the road or being just a story of a time you almost got hit head on by some guy in the middle a desert one night. A bit late, but just in time, I buckled my seat belt and decided not to become that guy. I threw my vehicle in drive and accelerated after you. Headed in your direction for the first time.

My heart raced as I drove fast to catch up to your vehicle once again and as I pulled up behind you, obnoxiously got your attention with my horn and the flashing of my lights. I couldn’t believe I had chased after you like a crazy! What would you think of this? Was I crazy?

As you stepped out of your vehicle your beauty was staggering and I confidently acknowledged, almost applauded myself; I had made the right decision. I jogged up to you on the pavement of that two lane highway and blurted out “When will I see you again?!”. Your laugh told me everything as it often did, I would learn.

I canceling my plans, my new job would have to wait, or I’d find a new one when I got to my destination. I suddenly had you placed at the center of my life’s main screen and didn’t for one second consider what else was on outside in my periphery. Everything seemed like it mattered just a little bit less than the focus my mind found when trained on you. I spent the day with you, headed in your direction. We played, both lost in the world together, on a new adventure, and loving every moment of it.

By that evening I was already in love, and knew it as for the first time I watched the sunset reflect forever in your eyes. I will never in my wildest dreams forget your smile when I admitted my love to you as we watched those stars again, together, that second night.

I also remember how we really met, and this isn’t it! Not even close! But it sure could have been. I mean, some things are similar to how we met all those years ago. You do remember don’t you?

The night we first met we were hurling in each other’s direction at a million miles per hour and barely missed colliding. That near miss put us into permanent dance as we orbited each other - dancing in and out of each other’s life, always friends, lovers, strangers, family; whatever we needed to be for the other at that specific moment in time. The first night we met I knew I had met the most amazing woman and I couldn’t believe that I had finally found you; never in my wildest dreams did I think you were really out there.

We did watch the stars and talked until the sun came up. We also spent the next day playing together and I really did watch the sunset reflect forever in your eyes. I did fall in love with you, only immediately, almost at first sight.

My love switch flipped the very moment you said “Hiiii” that way you did. Your mysterious brown eyes - strands coloring them wonderful, as your cheeks smiled for days. They reached into me latching onto my heart and I did not resist the comfort of your grasp. There was just something so familiar in the way you drew me in and made a place for me in your world. I felt like I had seen this smile of yours before somewhere and it belonged right after that “Hiiii”, and right in front of me. There was also something so familiar in the way you said my name, always smiling, you giggled a lot more back then.

I chased after you and that smile, following the echoes of that giggle from that moment on without any regret and loved every moment you chased me back laughing as we played. I remember how grateful I was getting to know you, and how grateful I always will be to have spent all the moments we shared through the years, building our story. The rest of that story and how we really first met is ours. A story to be remembered another time I think.


I remember the many other things that are similar in the story I have told but happened completely differently, to a completely different moment, in a completely different part of our story that I’d like to share in this letter to you. I think it is supposed to help...telling you these things, we always shared our deepest feelings with each other and It’s hard holding them all by myself. I’m working on it, love, I promised. Writing these letters to you and the chapters of our time together contained within.
In this part of our story, the true part of this story, and part of our chapters I’m sharing in this letter is a moment where I remember a collision that happened head on and it all started with a phone call.

I remember we were both asleep at the wheel and wholly unprepared as I raced down the highway to you. I remember how sudden the impact came after I reached your side. I remember the pain and jarring as your light in my world, that light that engulfed my vision completely, was in a moment no longer present. I remember my confusion as my momentum came to a complete, and immediate, stop. I remember that I didn’t even have time to scream or brace myself as everything in my world shattered in a devastating explosion and all it’s shiny pieces showered into the air around me. I remember that I didn’t even have both hands on the wheel as my life turned upside down. I remember that there was no seat belt to fasten me in as my breath choked in my throat, stalled, as if suspended mid air.

I remember the look, taste, sound, smell, touch, and feeling of every, single, thing, in that hospital room. I remember the smell of my tears in your hair. I remember how soft your skin was and that your fingernails were not painted like they normally were as I held your hand. I remember the feeling of my nerves as they achieved complete pandaemonium within me. I remember I was trembling as I struggled to breath between crying, then breathing, then crying, tasting the snot running from my nose mixed with the salt that clung to my face as I sat at your side. I remember hearing the sobs in the room as your heart rate monitor stopped blinking. I remember that exact moment you left me. I remember all of the feelings I felt at that moment as my emotions burned deep within and imprinted them as if by brand, permanently emblazoned on my soul. I remember not having the words for them then and I still do not have words for them now.

I remember every single detail, reflected in the pieces of my world as they crashed to the polished surface of the tiny room’s grey and white checkered tile floor. I remember that for the first time in a long time we were no longer running toward each other, or in the same direction together, and you weren’t there to make sure I was okay. I remember praying that you would be okay but my heart didn’t hear the echo of yours anymore to be sure. I remember hoping you were not lonely just minutes after you left and began crying: differently, because I didn’t know how to be there for you like I promised I always would be. I remember wanting so badly to chase after you, especially in the months that followed your funeral to keep that promise I made. I remember wanting to make sure you weren’t alone and be by your side as you took off on this new adventure to make sure you got under way okay. I remember trying to lighten my mood and joke about you making a new friend jealous, telling them about a guy that loved you unconditionally in another life. But, I remembered I could not chase you this time; I couldn’t be there to hold you if you happened to fall in love with him and he broke your heart. There was no catching up to you minutes down the road, just to see your smile again and hear you laugh at me for being silly. There was no way to pick you up off the ground and piece your heart back together with pieces of mine if it was broken this time.

I can only hope you receive all the letters like this one and that you are able to answer my call when I get home. We can meet in the middle of some two lane highway in the clouds, talking about life down below, or everything, or nothing, and laugh at the concept of time.

I can’t wait for that moment I see you again and we can remember all the years since the night we first met and remind each other how that story really went. I want so badly to be reminded exactly how it feels seeing the sunset reflect forever in your eyes like I used to.

I remember you every single day and wrote this letter to remind you: that more than anything, I patiently wait to learn how we finish our story, because never in my wildest dreams, could these stars be as beautiful as I remember, all those moments, I spent watching them with you.

10 Love
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2 Years of Nojoto Can you write a patriotic story?

This question was asked to me on Quora which is a social media app for asking questions and getting answers

Read the answer below

PRAKASH:

……………….

Year 1958 somewhere between Peshawar and Rawalpindi in Pakistan-

In some Pakistani school-

“Did you see that triple hundred scored by Hanif Mahamad?”

“Absolutely. He is a God”

“I wish I can bat like him one day”

“Stupid. First you need to register yourself to a cricket coaching camp”

“How do I do that? My father is labourer. He works for Khan saab. My father can't afford that. He barely puts foods on the table. It's a pipe dream which never going to be real”

(Silent crying)

“Don't be sad Prakash. When there's a will there's a way”

Couple of years later in Karachi-

“Alam Sir, I want to play cricket”

“Hmm. What is your name?”

“Prakash Sharma”

“Hindu!!! Wow!! I never thought I would see one in Pakistan!! Why are you people even here? Go back to your fucking Hindustan”

“You mean India!?”

“Yeah, whatever fancy name British gave. It will be always Hindustan to us. The point is Indians can't play cricket. Indians are lazy, idiots and unathletic superstitious dirty people. And you want to be a cricketer?!? Go be cobbler or something. That's more practical. Stupid Hindus”

Poor Prakash was broken hearted. He sat under one tree and cried his heart out.

When he went to his home, he saw his mother was quarreling with his father-

“If you send Asha to marry that bearded mullah. I will kill myself. He is old and already have five wives. Are you even human anymore?”

“You don't understand Shanti, we need money desperately. I can't carry this family anymore. He promised to give me 100 Pakistani rupees. Can you imagine 100 Pakistani rupees!!? That's a lot. They have money. Asha would be all right”

“You are selling your daughter”

“Yeah, what are the our options? No. Tell me Shanti. What is our option? We barely have any Hindus anymore after partion. Those who are here either begging or doing some slave job in Hyderabad. Asha would be okay marrying the Khan saab”

Prakash was already sad. He couldn't take this anymore. He went into his room and shut the door.

5 years later-

One morning-

Prakash was preparing to go in the paddy field as usual. Suddenly, he heard his old mother was crying.

“What happened?”

“They killed Asha. She wasn't young anymore. So they killed her after torturing her for so many years. They even sold her daughter to nearby ‘bayt daeara' (Brothel)”

Poor Prakash was feeling so helpless. He went to that bayt daeara to look for her niece.

But it was already too late. He found out that she was already sold to a Suadi Arabian theatre group. And they already were gone from Pakistan.

Poor Prakash thought at first to kill himself. Then he just bought a cheap wine from local illegal shop and got hammered.

He woke up hearing a lady voice.

“Bastard!! Get the hell out of here. Look he is sleeping here as if he owns the place”

(A lot of lady laughter)

Prakash was hung over from last night so he could barely see what was going on. He got up somehow. His head was still spinning.

He sat beside a nearby tree and again went to sleep. When he woke up, he heard a female crying voice. It was night time. He realised that he slept the whole day.

He went to look for the crying voice. He found one hole in one of the rooms where from the sound was coming. He peeked through the hole and he saw one guy in expensive salwar kameez was beating up one girl. He forced himself onto her.

Prakash could not watch anymore. He puked all over the place.

One hour later-

He again peeked through the hole and saw that the girl was still crying.

“Hey, behan (sister), do you want to get out of here?”

Girl was shocked.

“No. Who are you? Get out of there. If they saw you talking to me, they will kill you”

“Don't worry about me. I am coming from Punjab. I can take you out of here very easily. Now do you want to or not?”

“Why should I trust you? You are peeking through a hole?”

“Let's be honest, how much dangerous I can be, you are already going through hell everyday here”

“I don't know….”

“Don't think, just do it. We don't know when the guards would come back. I can't help you then”

“How do I get out of here?”

“Just jump from the window. I will catch you”

She did and Prakash managed to catch her.

But there was obviously sound. And guards were awakening.

“Come on, we don't have time. Let's run. We have to reach the station before they catch us”

While running both of them were hearing guard's realisation that one of their girl escaped.

They got on one compartment of a train. But the problem was that train wasn't moving.

“Saab, why the train isn't moving”

“Are you not from here? This train takes time to leave the station”

She was scared.

“Guards will be here and they will catch us and kill us”

“Shut up. Don't make any sound. It would be wise not to create any attention towards us”

One longest and insufferable hours passed-

Guards were searching through the station. They were searching all the trains including the one they were on. They were almost about to search their compartment. Both of them were sitting without taking any breath almost.

Suddenly, train started to move and leaved the station.

It was huge relief for both of them. They almost felt as if they were born again.

“What is your name?”

“Nusrat for now”

“What do you mean for now?”

“I was a hindu. They took me from home one night. And from then on I was living in that hell hole. I can't remember my actual name anymore”

“My name is Prakash Sharma. I will call you Archana from now on”

“Okay. Prakash ji. But where are we going?”

“My home”

When they reached their home and talked to Shanti and told her everything-

“What did you do? Now where do I keep her? I understand that you feel bad for the girl. But we can't keep her here. What will the neighbor say? Already there's a lot of social isolation because we are hindu. All kinds of things people say about us every other day. Now you bring her from bayt daeara!! I mean bayt daeara!!! You have lost your head”

“Just look at her eyes, mother. Just look at her innocent eyes and tell me that I didn't do the right thing”

Shanti could not hold herself back looking at sad innocent eyes of Archana. Both of them started to cry on each other shoulder.

Archana stayed there as Prakash's fake wife. Their relationship was just that. They never even spent in one room together.

Few months later-

People started to talk. One hindu nosy neighbour started to suspect something.

One day police came. They started to ask all kinds of questions about Archana.

Prakash managed to convince them otherwise. But police didn't look totally convinced.

Prakash realised that their nosy neighbour did this. When he confronted them about this.

“Sorry, Prakash, we live in good neighborhood. We don't want any unwanted attention here. It is always better to stay the good side of police”

Prakash was about give them his hard piece of mind but then he saw one of the police was talking to one of the guards from that bayt daeara in their police car.

He realised that there was no point arguing.

He came to Shanti and told her everything.

“Oh my god! What do we do now? Your father passed away. We just used to have both of us. Now because of Archana, we about to lose everything”

“I don't see that we have much options, mother. We have to escape to India. That is our only chance”

“What are you saying? How is it possible?”

“I have one friend in Lahore who illegally sell cows to India from border area. He has an understanding with the Pakistani border guards. I believe he can get us passed. We are childhood friend. He won't even take any money from us”

Archana heard everything.

“Thank you so much for everything. But it's time I return back to wherever I came from. I knew this won't last long. I can't put your family though anymore trouble because of me”

“What are you talking about, Archana? I didn't rescue you from that place to further sent you there. No, we are leaving Pakistan. I don't know where we would end up in India. But it would be better than Pakistan any day. I don't want to hear any negetivity from you”

“But why are you taking so many chances because of me? Is only because pity?”

“It was initially like that. But now I can't think my family without you”

“And why is that? What am I to you?”

“Someone close”

“Is that worth to take all this risk?”

“Absolutely”

Shanti was listening to both of their conversation. And last conversation put a smile on her face.

She was thinking, “These two don't even know that they like each other”

That night-

“What is going on, Prakash? Why your whole family is here?”

“Ali bhai, my friend, we are in serious trouble. We need to leave Pakistan immediately. Please help bhai. We will give you everything we have”

“No. No. Money isn't an issue. It's just that there has been more security tightening on the border than before. You know Kashmir issue has made everything more tensed between Hindustan and Pakistan. Cow smuggling is one thing but human!? It's completely different and risky. Let's see what I can do”

“Thank you so much bhai”

In India Pakistan border-

“I just talked to the border guards. They told me we just have one minute. If anyone sees us, we will be shot to death. Sorry, my friend. I can't help more than that”

“You have done so much already. I will always be grateful to you, my friend”

“Hey, you never know I might also settle in India in the future. The way things are regressing in Pakistan. Anything is possible”

“Absolutely, bhai. Absolutely”

All these rush made Shanti's old heart pumping. She realised that she was having heart attack.

“Prakash, you two go. I can't anymore. My heart is in tremendous pain”

“You have given birth to me, mother, I will never leave you. I will carry you on my shoulder, mother. Come quickly Archana”

But the road was too dangerous to carry Shanti. Prakash fall down crossing the border. Suddenly, bullets came flying in like rain.

One of the bullets took the head off Shanti.

Archana was about to shout through sheer shock but Prakash blocked her mouth with his hands and jumped across the border together leaving Shanti's dead body behind.

After getting close to Indian military camp, they both went unconscious because of all the stress and anxiety.

One day later-

Archana woke up.

“You finally woke up. I was starting to get worried. We are safe. I talked to Indian army, they are taking us to Delhi”

One Indian solder came.

“My name is lietenant Saeed Khan of Indian army. I have heard everything from Prakash. You are really brave and extremely lucky to be alive. I just talked my superiors and they have talked to the home minister. You are going to be awarded in Delhi. Your stories are all over the newspapers. Everyone is cheering your name in India. Wait for a big welcome in Delhi”

Prakash said, “Thank you so much Saab but we just want some peace and quiet place to stay.”

…………………………………………………………………………

Mordern day some where in India-

A laud cheer was going on in the press conference

One journalist asked, “Mr Rahul Sharma, today you are the captain of Indian cricket team. Best cricketer in the whole world. Some are even saying that you are the all time best ever. You are the most popular cricketer today. Yet we didn't know anything about your family past. How did you manage to keep this tragic yet such interesting past secret?”

Rahul Sharma replied, “I also didn't know anything about my great grandfather Prakash Sharma's struggle. Until few years ago in our old house I found the diary of my grand father's father who wrote this after hearing from his mother Archana Sharma. I then decided to publish this book. I had to share this with everyone”

(Another loud clapping sound was going on)

THE END

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6 Love

PRAKASH:

……………….

Year 1958 somewhere between Peshawar and Rawalpindi in Pakistan-

In some Pakistani school-

“Did you see that triple hundred scored by Hanif Mahamad?”

“Absolutely. He is a God”

“I wish I can bat like him one day”

“Stupid. First you need to register yourself to a cricket coaching camp”

“How do I do that? My father is labourer. He works for Khan saab. My father can't afford that. He barely puts foods on the table. It's a pipe dream which never going to be real”

(Silent crying)

“Don't be sad Prakash. When there's a will there's a way”

Couple of years later in Karachi-

“Alam Sir, I want to play cricket”

“Hmm. What is your name?”

“Prakash Sharma”

“Hindu!!! Wow!! I never thought I would see one in Pakistan!! Why are you people even here? Go back to your fucking Hindustan”

“You mean India!?”

“Yeah, whatever fancy name British gave. It will be always Hindustan to us. The point is Indians can't play cricket. Indians are lazy, idiots and unathletic superstitious dirty people. And you want to be a cricketer?!? Go be cobbler or something. That's more practical. Stupid Hindus”

Poor Prakash was broken hearted. He sat under one tree and cried his heart out.

When he went to his home, he saw his mother was quarreling with his father-

“If you send Asha to marry that bearded mullah. I will kill myself. He is old and already have five wives. Are you even human anymore?”

“You don't understand Shanti, we need money desperately. I can't carry this family anymore. He promised to give me 100 Pakistani rupees. Can you imagine 100 Pakistani rupees!!? That's a lot. They have money. Asha would be all right”

“You are selling your daughter”

“Yeah, what are the our options? No. Tell me Shanti. What is our option? We barely have any Hindus anymore after partion. Those who are here either begging or doing some slave job in Hyderabad. Asha would be okay marrying the Khan saab”

Prakash was already sad. He couldn't take this anymore. He went into his room and shut the door.

5 years later-

One morning-

Prakash was preparing to go in the paddy field as usual. Suddenly, he heard his old mother was crying.

“What happened?”

“They killed Asha. She wasn't young anymore. So they killed her after torturing her for so many years. They even sold her daughter to nearby ‘bayt daeara' (Brothel)”

Poor Prakash was feeling so helpless. He went to that bayt daeara to look for her niece.

But it was already too late. He found out that she was already sold to a Suadi Arabian theatre group. And they already were gone from Pakistan.

Poor Prakash thought at first to kill himself. Then he just bought a cheap wine from local illegal shop and got hammered.

He woke up hearing a lady voice.

“Bastard!! Get the hell out of here. Look he is sleeping here as if he owns the place”

(A lot of lady laughter)

Prakash was hung over from last night so he could barely see what was going on. He got up somehow. His head was still spinning.

He sat beside a nearby tree and again went to sleep. When he woke up, he heard a female crying voice. It was night time. He realised that he slept the whole day.

He went to look for the crying voice. He found one hole in one of the rooms where from the sound was coming. He peeked through the hole and he saw one guy in expensive salwar kameez was beating up one girl. He forced himself onto her.

Prakash could not watch anymore. He puked all over the place.

One hour later-

He again peeked through the hole and saw that the girl was still crying.

“Hey, behan (sister), do you want to get out of here?”

Girl was shocked.

“No. Who are you? Get out of there. If they saw you talking to me, they will kill you”

“Don't worry about me. I am coming from Punjab. I can take you out of here very easily. Now do you want to or not?”

“Why should I trust you? You are peeking through a hole?”

“Let's be honest, how much dangerous I can be, you are already going through hell everyday here”

“I don't know….”

“Don't think, just do it. We don't know when the guards would come back. I can't help you then”

“How do I get out of here?”

“Just jump from the window. I will catch you”

She did and Prakash managed to catch her.

But there was obviously sound. And guards were awakening.

“Come on, we don't have time. Let's run. We have to reach the station before they catch us”

While running both of them were hearing guard's realisation that one of their girl escaped.

They got on one compartment of a train. But the problem was that train wasn't moving.

“Saab, why the train isn't moving”

“Are you not from here? This train takes time to leave the station”

She was scared.

“Guards will be here and they will catch us and kill us”

“Shut up. Don't make any sound. It would be wise not to create any attention towards us”

One longest and insufferable hours passed-

Guards were searching through the station. They were searching all the trains including the one they were on. They were almost about to search their compartment. Both of them were sitting without taking any breath almost.

Suddenly, train started to move and leaved the station.

It was huge relief for both of them. They almost felt as if they were born again.

“What is your name?”

“Nusrat for now”

“What do you mean for now?”

“I was a hindu. They took me from home one night. And from then on I was living in that hell hole. I can't remember my actual name anymore”

“My name is Prakash Sharma. I will call you Archana from now on”

“Okay. Prakash ji. But where are we going?”

“My home”

When they reached their home and talked to Shanti and told her everything-

“What did you do? Now where do I keep her? I understand that you feel bad for the girl. But we can't keep her here. What will the neighbor say? Already there's a lot of social isolation because we are hindu. All kinds of things people say about us every other day. Now you bring her from bayt daeara!! I mean bayt daeara!!! You have lost your head”

“Just look at her eyes, mother. Just look at her innocent eyes and tell me that I didn't do the right thing”

Shanti could not hold herself back looking at sad innocent eyes of Archana. Both of them started to cry on each other shoulder.

Archana stayed there as Prakash's fake wife. Their relationship was just that. They never even spent in one room together.

Few months later-

People started to talk. One hindu nosy neighbour started to suspect something.

One day police came. They started to ask all kinds of questions about Archana.

Prakash managed to convince them otherwise. But police didn't look totally convinced.

Prakash realised that their nosy neighbour did this. When he confronted them about this.

“Sorry, Prakash, we live in good neighborhood. We don't want any unwanted attention here. It is always better to stay the good side of police”

Prakash was about give them his hard piece of mind but then he saw one of the police was talking to one of the guards from that bayt daeara in their police car.

He realised that there was no point arguing.

He came to Shanti and told her everything.

“Oh my god! What do we do now? Your father passed away. We just used to have both of us. Now because of Archana, we about to lose everything”

“I don't see that we have much options, mother. We have to escape to India. That is our only chance”

“What are you saying? How is it possible?”

“I have one friend in Lahore who illegally sell cows to India from border area. He has an understanding with the Pakistani border guards. I believe he can get us passed. We are childhood friend. He won't even take any money from us”

Archana heard everything.

“Thank you so much for everything. But it's time I return back to wherever I came from. I knew this won't last long. I can't put your family though anymore trouble because of me”

“What are you talking about, Archana? I didn't rescue you from that place to further sent you there. No, we are leaving Pakistan. I don't know where we would end up in India. But it would be better than Pakistan any day. I don't want to hear any negetivity from you”

“But why are you taking so many chances because of me? Is only because pity?”

“It was initially like that. But now I can't think my family without you”

“And why is that? What am I to you?”

“Someone close”

“Is that worth to take all this risk?”

“Absolutely”

Shanti was listening to both of their conversation. And last conversation put a smile on her face.

She was thinking, “These two don't even know that they like each other”

That night-

“What is going on, Prakash? Why your whole family is here?”

“Ali bhai, my friend, we are in serious trouble. We need to leave Pakistan immediately. Please help bhai. We will give you everything we have”

“No. No. Money isn't an issue. It's just that there has been more security tightening on the border than before. You know Kashmir issue has made everything more tensed between Hindustan and Pakistan. Cow smuggling is one thing but human!? It's completely different and risky. Let's see what I can do”

“Thank you so much bhai”

In India Pakistan border-

“I just talked to the border guards. They told me we just have one minute. If anyone sees us, we will be shot to death. Sorry, my friend. I can't help more than that”

“You have done so much already. I will always be grateful to you, my friend”

“Hey, you never know I might also settle in India in the future. The way things are regressing in Pakistan. Anything is possible”

“Absolutely, bhai. Absolutely”

All these rush made Shanti's old heart pumping. She realised that she was having heart attack.

“Prakash, you two go. I can't anymore. My heart is in tremendous pain”

“You have given birth to me, mother, I will never leave you. I will carry you on my shoulder, mother. Come quickly Archana”

But the road was too dangerous to carry Shanti. Prakash fall down crossing the border. Suddenly, bullets came flying in like rain.

One of the bullets took the head off Shanti.

Archana was about to shout through sheer shock but Prakash blocked her mouth with his hands and jumped across the border together leaving Shanti's dead body behind.

After getting close to Indian military camp, they both went unconscious because of all the stress and anxiety.

One day later-

Archana woke up.

“You finally woke up. I was starting to get worried. We are safe. I talked to Indian army, they are taking us to Delhi”

One Indian solder came.

“My name is lietenant Saeed Khan of Indian army. I have heard everything from Prakash. You are really brave and extremely lucky to be alive. I just talked my superiors and they have talked to the home minister. You are going to be awarded in Delhi. Your stories are all over the newspapers. Everyone is cheering your name in India. Wait for a big welcome in Delhi”

Prakash said, “Thank you so much Saab but we just want some peace and quiet place to stay.”

…………………………………………………………………………

Mordern day some where in India-

A laud cheer was going on in the press conference

One journalist asked, “Mr Rahul Sharma, today you are the captain of Indian cricket team. Best cricketer in the whole world. Some are even saying that you are the all time best ever. You are the most popular cricketer today. Yet we didn't know anything about your family past. How did you manage to keep this tragic yet such interesting past secret?”

Rahul Sharma replied, “I also didn't know anything about my great grandfather Prakash Sharma's struggle. Until few years ago in our old house I found the diary of my grand father's father who wrote this after hearing from his mother Archana Sharma. I then decided to publish this book. I had to share this with everyone”

(Another loud clapping sound was going on)

THE END

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3 Love

Gita on Character Building
Human body is only for attaining God (Paramatma). etc. Therefore, if one becomes determinate on the one aim of God Realization, then man will turn towards God. On turning towards God, good qualities-good conduct come on their own, and character building begins to take place. However, if man forgets about God Realization, and begins to hoard worldly possessions and enjoy sense pleasures, then he falls down in character. He who loses his character, is not even worthy and deserving of being called a man.“Par drohee par daar rat par dhan par apabaad |Te nar paanvar paapamai deha dhare manujaad ||(Manas 7/39)Bhagavad Gita’s entire spiritual instructions are for building character. Previously, Arjuna’s sentiment was to fight the war, therefore he invited Lord and accepted Him in the form of a charioteer and became ready to enter the battlefield to fight. However, Lord’s intent was to see to Arjuna’s eternal good (salvation). Arjuna said that place the chariot in-between both the armies so that I can see who is present to fight me with both hands. The Lord, did exactly as told and placed the chariot right in between both the armies and said, that see the members of the Kuru dynasty (1/21-25). On hearing the word, Kuru dynasty, Arjuna suddenly became conscious of his family, affiliated with his body. He became frightened by the thought that all of them will die and thus turning away from his duty, said – I will not fight. To turn away from one’s duty is the main obstacle in character building. The Lord said – O’ What are you doing? It is your duty to fight, therefore giving up attachment and cowardliness, stand up to fight (Gita 2/2-3).It is only to engage man in the path of duty that Bhagavad Gita manifested. It is only in renouncing your rights and properly performing your duties that character is developed, whereas on neglecting your duties the character is destroyed. God says – “Na tvevaaham jaatu naasam….” (Gita 2/12) - Here the Lord begins His spiritual instructions and first deliberates on the body and the indweller, the perishable and imperishable. The point is that leaving aside (not paying attention to) the perishable things, pay attention to the imperishable. By doing so, character building takes place.There is one very important point, that when the aim is of the imperishable, the perishable things will come on their own. You will not have to undergo suffering for them. But if the aim and focus is of the perishable, the imperishable essence will not be attained, and one will have to worry and make an effort for the perishable. And further ahead Lord says, that see toward one’s innate duty, therefore it is only beneficial to fight the war of righteousness for a Kshatriya. (Gita 2/31). The point is that it is only by fulfilling duty that man progresses, and by going towards non-duty he takes a fall. The main thing in fulfilling one’s duty, is to renounce desires, proprietary interest and attachment. The meaning of renouncing these is that one should not have the aim of “jada”, the inert (insentient). Previously the body etc. were not ours, later on as well, they will not remain ours and at present too they are separating from us every single moment. If this kind of alertness is awakened then the aim will not be of the inert and the senses, the inner faculties will be restrained and controlled on their own. In self-control itself is the building of character. In lack of control and lack of restraint, progress is curtailed and with that the character falls.In the beginning of the third Chapter, Arjuna asks that why are you engaging me in these most sinful acts? Lord says – though these appear to be very sinful on the surface, than too one must fulfill their duties by giving up selfishness, proprietary interest, egoism, and desires. By doing so, the dreadfulness does not remain, only the action remains. Actions can be various according to one’s varna (order of life) and ashram (stage in life), but the terribleness, the filth, the passion , all lead to one’s downfall, and it arises due to desires. Keeping desires in the forefront if one reads and shares with others the spiritual messages (with the aim of money or other things), it is considered demoniac tendency and one cannot escape sins; even on listening and sharing spiritual truths, good character cannot be developed because desire is the root of all sins (Gita 3/37). However, if the aim is God, then even though engaged in worldly duties and activities, then too good character will come in them. Therefore, in the third chapter, Lord gives great emphasis on renouncing desires and doing one’s duty. Similarly, in the fourth chapter it has been said that when there is no desires, when there is no sense of pride in doership, then all actions become inactions, in other words, even while doing karma, man is not bound; because his aim is to go towards God. In the fifth chapter also says to fulfill one’s duty -Yuktah karmaphalam tyaktvaa shanatimaanoti naishthikim |Ayuktah kaamkaarena phale sakto nibhadhyate || (Gita 5/12)“He who is a Karmayogi, who by abandoning attachment to the fruit of action, attains everlasting peace (God Realization); whereas, he who acts with a selfish motive, being attached to the fruit of actions through desire acquires bondage.” Fruits (objects) are the kind that will be born and will later perish, but the desire for them is what is binding. Desire makes one fall in character. When character takes a fall, there is lack of peace and whereas building character, one attains peace. The moment there is ill feelings in the mind, one experiences lack of peace. And the moment there is good feelings within, peace immediately follows.If you are attentive, then it is every man’s experience that the more that he renounces the perishable, that much peace, joy, equanimity, good qualities, continue to come in him and the more that he desires the perishable things, that much lack of peace, discord, anguish, burning infliction, and bad qualities arise.In the sixth chapter also, it has been said to engage in God having “That” as the aim. That God is present and pervading everywhere. He who sees Me (the Universal Self, God) present in all beings and sees all beings existing in Me (Paramatma), I am never out of sight for him, nor is he ever out of my sight.Yo maam paschyati sarvatra sarvam cha mayi pashyatiTasyaahum na pranashyaami sa cha mein na pranashyati || (Gita 6/30)That man who sees other’s sorrow and happiness as his own happiness and sorrow, he is an eternal yogi -Aatmoupamyena sarvatra samam pashyati yorjuna |Sukham va yadi vaa dukham sa yogi paramo matah || (Gita 6/32)He who has the sentiments - Let there be no sorrow such a one attains God (Paramatma tattva). How can the suffering of all come to an end? How can all be happy? One who has such sentiments - their character is the highest of all. Further when the conversation lead to bringing the mind under control, then the Lord revealed about study and practice “abhyaas” and detachment “vairaag” (Gita 6/35). In other words, there too the talks are about removing the mind from the world, and engaging it in God. When talking about progress in the life beyond this world, there too the same has been intellect is only in God, he is considered the best among the yogis (Gita 6/47). He who walks the path of God, if his spiritual practices comes to an end in the middle and he dies then too he will be benefited, he will attain misfortune (Gita 6/40). Those who do work for the welfare of all, even if their work is left incomplete, he will be benefited. He whose mind and It is only eminent to be engaged in God.He who is not devoted to God, God calls him an evil doer (Gita 7/15) and he who is devoted to God, he is called virtuous (Gita 7/16). The point is that he who walks the path towards God are called virtuous and benevolent, and he who walks the path of the world is called an evil-doer. Further ahead it is said that he whose actions are pure, whose character is great, they become unyielding in their spiritual pursuits and do worship and devotion of God (Gita 7/28).
In walking the path towards God, remembrance is the key point. In the beginning of the Eight Chapter, on questioning by Arjuna, the Lord said that he who leaves this body while remembering Me, he attains Me - of this there is no doubt. (Gita 8/5).
Because whatever the sentiments and feelings that are recollected at the time of leaving the body, that alone he attains. (Gita 8/6) Therefore God says, that keep in mind and remember Me at all times - “Sarveshu kaaleshu Maamanusmara” (Gita 8/7). Then God said something extra-ordinary that he who remembers Me at all times, for him I am easily attainable.
Anayacheta satatam yo maam smarati nityasah |
Tasyaham sulabh paarth nitya yuktasya yoginah || (Gita 8/14)
To remember God is a divine trait. It is innateness the root of good character. The meaning of being in remembrance of God is - that remembering and recollecting the innate relation that we have with God, that very relationship, is the one only real relationship. I do not have a relationship with the world. I have only assumed a relationship with the world, therefore this relationship does not last. It is clearly seen that the relationships we have in this birth, they were not there in the previous birth, and they will not be there in the next birth. In the same way this world is constantly changing, but God is the same, as Is, and I myself am also the same. Therefore my relationship with Paramatma is eternal. Remembering this itself is recollection and remembrance (smruti). Thinking can also be of the world, but “smruti” can only be of God. On having such recollection and remembrance, good character is axiomatic.
He who is inclined towards God, becomes the best of all. There is greater gains among those who walk the path of God with aim of God, than the gains that come from Vedas (holy texts), sacrifice, austerities, charity, visiting holy places, fasting etc. (Gita 8/28).
Therefore inclination towards God is considered to to be the sovereign of sciences (king of all knowledge), most mysterious, supremely holy, most excellent, directly realizable, endowed with virtues, very easy to practice and imperishable (Gita 9/2). God finds Himself to be so easy to attain, that “he who with devotion offers a leaf, a flower, a fruit, water etc. I partake in that thing., (Gita 9/26). Therefore, whatever you do, whatever you eat, whatever you offer in sacrifice (yajna), whateer you bestow as a gift, whatever you do by way of penance, dedicate it all to Me, then you will be freed from bondage of actions having good and bad results; and freed from them you yourself having completely surrendered shall attain Me (Gita 9/27 – 28).
Whether a man is evil or good – he must not worry. The main point is that that he is engaged in God. On becoming engaged in God, his bad conduct cannot last. He can very quickly become righteous and he attains eternal peace (Gita 9/30-31) . Women folks, Vaisyas, Sudras, and even those that are born of sinful wombs taking refuge in Me, attain the Supreme God. (Gita 9/32-33). However many different “jaatis” that are present, of these externally there is the separation due to nature, but from within all are a part of God. Therefore in worldly relations, the importance is of conducting one’s self according to one’s “Varna,” but in the path of spirituality, there is no importance of “varna” etc. because in the form of divinity (being a part of God), every one’s true nature is pure and all are equally entitled to God. God says, that “Fix your mind on Me, be devoted to Me, adore Me, prostrate to Me, thus making yourself steadfast in Me, and entirely surrendering to Me, you will reach Me.” (Gita 9/34). The point of all this is that only be engaged in Me.
In the tenth chapter on Arjuna’s pleading, God described His super human powers and His Universal form. The essence of what He said - “I am all pervasive in the World. Wherever you see something extra-ordinary, (glorious, brilliant, powerful), know it to be a manifestation of a spark of My splendor” (Gita 10/41). That specialty is due to Me alone. The point is that wherever whatever you find brilliant, abundant, remarkable, there too, the sight should turn towards God. There after he says “what is the reason for you to gain detailed knowledge? I stand supporting the entire Universe, with a single fragment of Myself.” (Gita 10/42) On hearing this, Arjuna, desired to see that Universal Form of the Lord, in Whose single fragment is the entire Universe. The Lord bestowed Arjuna with “divya chakshu” (special divine vision) to behold this sight. * On seeing the divine vision, Arjuna became perplexed, became filled with fear, became charmed. Then God said that this is your foolishness. I am the same One, then why are you fearful?
In the twelfth Chapter, Arjuna asked “he who worships the Imperishable and the Unmanifest and he who worships God with attributes (bhaktimarg), which of the two are better versed in yoga? (Gita 12/1). The path of the Imperishable, Unmanifest (jnana marg), are using their own effort, but in the path of “bhakti” the dependence is on only God. In the path of the Imperishable, divine attributes, discrimination and detachment etc. have to be acquired, but in the path of devotion, on taking refuge in the Lord, divine qualities, good attributes and conduct are automatically and naturally acquired (Gita 12/7). Therefore God says that “you give your mind and intellect to Me alone, there upon you will live in Me alone.” (Gita 12/8). God says - the devotee who is living in Me alone, is most dear to Me. As such, all the beings are dear to God, but he who takes refuge in God, he is most dear to God. Simply by being devoted and engrossed in God, good qualities and conduct come on its own, without any effort.
In the thirteenth Chapter, God describes the path of knowledge (of the Imperishable), and while he describes good qualities such as “absence of pride” (amaanitva) etc., he brings up “Unswerving Devotion to Me with sole dependence on Me alone” – ”Mayi chaananyayogen bhaktiravyabhichaarini” (Gita 13/10). In the Fourteenth Chapter also there is talks about devotion “bhakti” - “He who worships Me with unadulterated devotion, rises above the three modes and becomes eligible, for attaining Brahma”. (Gita 14/26). It is only due to affinity with attributes (gunas) that demonaic traits are born, due to which births in higher and lower forms take place. On walking the path of Divinity (God), one rises above the three modes.
In the fifteenth chapter God reveals His extra-ordinary glories and radiance and says that I am the Supreme Personality (Supreme Soul) over both the “Insentient” (Perishable) and “Sentient” (Imperishable Embodied Soul). (Gita 15/16-18). He who knows Me as the Supreme Personality, the Highest Person, is “sarvavid” the knower of all, and he worships Me, with all his being. (Gita 15/19). Divine traits naturally manifest in him who is devoted to Me and worships Me. Therefore in Sixteenth Chapter, God gives the description of “Divine Traits”. But, he who has become distant from God, who only wants to nourish his own body, to engage in sense enjoyments and in hoarding, demoniac tendencies manifest in him. God elaborates at great length those demoniac traits in the Sixteenth Chapter. He says, Divine traits leads to liberation, whereas Demoniac traits lead to bondage. (Gita 16/5), and such a person attains birth through 8.4 million different wombs (Gita 16/19) and goes to hell. (Gita 16/20).
In the Seventeenth Chapter, the Lord describes the three modes - of goodness (sattvic), passion (rajasic) and ignorance (tamasic). Even on seeing this, the goodness and divine sentiments are among those that have a disinclination for the world and inclination towards God. They rise above the sentiments of passion and ignorance. Thus those who perform the acts of sacrifice, penance and various acts of charity for God, then such acts are of the mode of goodness and they are liberating. (Gita 17/25). However if they are done for the world, i.e. with aim of honor, fame, pleasure, rest and relaxation etc. and sacrifices, austerities, charity etc. done with negligence and ignorance, then they become of the mode of passion and ignorance.
In the Eighteenth chapter, God elaborates in great detail, Sanyaas (Sankhyayoga) and “tyaag” (Karmayog). In the end God concludes that leave dependency of all dharmas, and only take refuge in Me.
“Sarvadharmaan parityajya maamekum sharanam vraja |
Aham tvaa sarvapaapebhyo Mokshayishyami maa suchah || (Gita 18/66)
All the work in the world, all accomplishments, all progress, all is encompassed in that one – “sharanagati” (taking refuge in the Lord”. God says that all the sins that are there, evil qualities and conduct, I will free you from these. You do not worry. By My grace, the divine traits will come naturally, on their own.
Just as a child that stays in his mother’s lap, gets provided for, is nourished, taken care of and he grows, similarly, on taking the refuge in the Lord, all the good traits and conduct will come unknowingly. Building of character will take place on its own.
In this manner, in the entire Gita if one sees then there is only one point - walking the path towards God, i.e. becoming inclined towards God. The aim of going towards the Lord is itself an aid in preventing the fall of one’s character. All evil qualities and conduct come from desire for sense pleasures and hoarding. Of this, the importance of money and dependence on it, leads to the worst downfall. By this, man’s character goes down. When character takes a fall, people talk ill of him and he is dishonored.
A man who has fallen in character, he is lower than even animal and those dwelling in hell; because animal and hellish ones are suffering the consequences of their past actions, and are moving towards human birth, but by incurring sins, a characterless man, is moving towards animal life and hell! Association of such men is the kind that will lead to downfall. Therefore it is said -
Baru bhal baas narak kar taataa |
Dusht sang jani deyi bidhaataa || (Manas 5/46/4)
Therefore for improving your character, become inclined towards God, that is – I am God’s and God is mine. I am not this world’s, the world is not mine.
The mistake that man makes is that which is not his, those thing that belong to the world, he considers them as his own, and that which is actually his, i.e. God, he does not accept as his own. As such, if it is seen, the things of the world are his only for proper use. But for himself, God is his very own. Because the things belong to the world, therefore they have to be offered to the world for serving and man himself is God’s, therefore he must surrender himself to God. Neither he has to take anything from the world, nor does he have anything to take from God. If something is to be taken, then let that be God Himself.
By desiring things of the world, one establishes a relationship with the world. Desire arises from attachment, i.e. desire arises by considering the body, wife, son, wealth, etc. as mine. Now if we think and accept the body, wife, son, wealth etc. as our own, can we say we have an independent right over them? Can we keep them as long as we like? Can we stay with them forever? If the answer is No! Than what is the difficulty in getting rid of the sense of mine-ness? By leaving the erroneously accepted sense of mine, desires will not arise. When desires do not arise, automatically there will be a feeling of mine-ness with God; because God is eternally ours from time immemorial and God is ever-attained. On having sense of mine-ness with God, feelings and conduct will be purified.
Body, wife, son, wealth, house, various possessions, are they real or unreal – this doubt may arise, but our relationship with them is unreal, of this there is no possibility of doubt at all. On knowing the unreal as unreal, the unreal relation is renounced very easily and on becoming inclined towards God, the eternal relationship with God is automatically awakened. Thereafter good character and conduct comes on its own and man becomes a role-model of good character, in other words, his character becomes one that is worthy of respect.
Yadyadaacharati shreshthasttdevetaro janah |
Sa yatpramaanam kurute lokastdanuvartate ||
(Gita 3/21)
Whatever an ideal person does, he is followed by others, as well. Whatever standard he sets, the world follows the same.”
A person of good character is never dependent. An ideal person is entirely independent, capable, eligible and entitled.
Narayana ! Narayana !! Narayana !!!
From "Kalyaan Path" in Hindi by Swami Ramsukhdasji

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