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Mr. A

When The Death is close... the quality of life improves

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4e2bfb7e46faddd8aae67d71b8d65652

Mr. A

I know it's getting little hard,
Maybe more....
A little suffocating sometimes,
you are finding it harder to breathe.
But look it's okay hun.
It's okay you can rest for a bit,
You can listen to your favourite song on repeat 
and watch some movie and smile..
It's okay if you are not feeling like waking up from the bed.
I was feeling that too..
You don't need to prove anything to anyone ever....
You only need to understand yourself...
Take your time, your world can always wait for you to shine,
And with the world your 11 year old self too...
Do you ever think there is a past you...
The 11 year old self of you 
Looking at you with twinkling eyes 
Because they are soo proud of you..
They adore you,
They look at you and feel happy for how hard you are trying 
every single time and not giving up...
They are looking at you being brave,
They look at you when you succeed,
They look at you when You are crying too...
But it's okay..
You know when you are alone there is no one with you...
You are thinking about giving up but
 then there is a little voice inside you saying this
 try this one last time ...
And honestly,I don't care if you ever disappoint
 someone or give up on something...
It's okay we are humans 
but when you disappoint yourself...
I blame you because disappointing anyone in the world
 is not in our control but disappointing yourself is in your control..
Don't disappoint your 11 year old self 
Try one last time for them... #RaysOfHope
4e2bfb7e46faddd8aae67d71b8d65652

Mr. A

Dear Someone
I have been observing you for a while, how you just sits with pen and paper to carved out a poem but You can't. It feels like you have lost inspiration and zeal to write one. This may seem simple to the world but I know how you are feeling, feeling that the words you nurtured also betrayed you.
I know you thinked about this problem and you find a conclusion that you don't WANT to write anymore. There are feelings echoing in you heart, gifting you heartache but you are scared to jot it down.You feel numb ,you try to become the person who gets affected by pain of others but now you don't. 
Someone ! I know you count every passing day. I know you want to reverse time or run back in time. I know you always carry your pain within yourself. I know you try to smile hard but didn't get one . You are scared of people, friends,love,trust and a bad thing about your adrenaline rush is that you become aggressive. You are always ready for a war no matter who is your opponent and how much harm it can make to you. Your logical thinking overpowered the real you. While going through your playlist. I find it wierd, the person who has a very fine quality of songs with him started listening anything from anywhere.
The one who always have earphones hanging around his neck stops following songs even of there favourite singers too. Sometimes you forgot that you have your earphones with you too. 
I know you are alone and you feel that things and the surrounding also gets lonelier when you are alone. dear someone

dear someone #Talk

4e2bfb7e46faddd8aae67d71b8d65652

Mr. A

 #selftalks
4e2bfb7e46faddd8aae67d71b8d65652

Mr. A

Dear Someone...
I know you are facing your own demons alone. You encountered with nightmares
everytime you close your eyes but the hardest thing you gonna face is not some monster. It's gonna the feeling of uselessness when you can't do anything. I know you are scared.... Scared of everything around you. I know you become a person who prefer chaos over silences. 
Right now you are not thinking about the wounds you have  but  to Being with someone who needs you more then you need yourself. You know no one can fix you not friendships,not love, not even you yourself can't do this. There is a strom brewing inside you and you are just trying to protect everyone around you from that. I know all you want is a day without sadness but deep down you know it had become eternal part of your life and you have to embrace it just like you embrace all the pain of your surroundings because sometimes you can't fight.... Sometimes you have live with it and now you don't have that vibe, that courage to hold it anymore... 
Someone ! You try to busy yourself with work to fill that emptiness but I wanna tell you it will not workout for you. You will work hard just to fill that void, you will achieve success, everyone around you appreciate you, from family to friends but for you it's just a void, a blank space that you are trying to fill... Someone ! You will not get satisfaction from your success and that will be reflected in your reflexes. I would suggest do not try to fill that void. It's never be late to stop doing things that affects everything around you. You can reverse the choices you made. You can earn every possible thing if you want .... 
Remember your light is your greatest friend even though you don't believe in friendships.. 

Your's 
Heartache..


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