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Kahaniya upar wala likhta hai or hum sab uske kirdaar hai iska yakin muje hua par both waqt baad
Meri kahani mai sirf teen kirdaar hai ye koi love tringle to nahi par usse kam bhi nahi tha
Muje yaad hai jab maine 2013 June mai apna naya office join kiya us waqt mai already 5 saal se relationship mai tha vo relationship aisa tha jiski shruat bhi kisi kahani se kam nahi thi par agar mai usse btaane lag jaau to shayad ik puri kita

10 Love
2 Share

"Aas jagi thi armano Mai dil jala hai toofano Mai. Kuch gunj raha makano Mai kuch lut gya virano Mai. Kuch tuta pathar kanch ka kuch pani jala Maikhano Mai. Kuch bewafai k rang they kuch mere apne sang they. Kuch lut lai gya wo chor kuch geet gata reh gya mor. Kuch ansun bane asmannno mai,kuch badal barse samshano mai. Kuch mohbat huyi azadi mai kuch tuta sapna barbadi Mai. Kuch mera bachpan pas th, masum sa patang sath tha, kuch uda hawa jawani wo kata patang beimani Mai. Kuch rutbe ki jung thi yaro ki masti sang thi. Kuch seharo ki choriyon ki chal thi,gawon ki gori v Kya kamal thi, kuch mera dil betab tha kuch uska chehra khas tha,waqat jawani ka ehsas tha hontho se hontho ka milan mithas tha. Kuch manzil gustakh thi dur ho kar pas v thi. Kuch gehri chal dushman ki kuch mere pankh nadan they, kuch chidi jung jwani ki jab yar mere kamaal the. Kuch chunri ka parda tha,kuch noor ka shingar tha, Wo mohale ki ladki ka nakhra v kamal tha. Kuch lori gayi daadi ne kuch Dada ji k thath they wo v kya zamane they jab Bhai hote aath(8) they Kuch kadamo mai mitti thi, juban sabki chitti(white)thi,bharose ka karobar tha pag vat yar tha chunni vat saheli thi,muh boli maa thi muh boli mamta gali ki mayon ki,dudh sabka ek tha bacha v na koi fake tha. sachayi ki kadar thi dilo Mai machi gaddar thi, School kam they qabliyat mai Dam they,hisab pakke they chahe ungliyon pe ratte they. desh ghulam tha Leader nilam tha azadi k parwano ka fansi ko salam tha Wo bharat mera bohat mahan tha. Kuch khule maidan they bail(ox) kheto ki shaan they, kissan desh ki jaan they barsate sawan aam they, Kheto Mai mehnat khoob thi,kat ti fasal lagte mele bhaisakhi mai jhoomte wo kissano k theley(bailgaadi). Kuch maa ka anchal wo maa ka pyar,wo rota bachpan maa ka dular, kuch maa ki majburi maa ka kam. nipta k kam jab wo banati muje chand,wo mele Mai khilone ki zid wo Ruth k maa ka palu pakde gujarta waqat. wo baap ka rutba, kuch baap ka dar, wo baap ka kandha bethe pakda mai uska sar, wo cycle ki seat wo chidiyon k ghar, kuch kache makan khula aangan, wo rishtedaron k roshan they Mann wo apnapan, wo chala gya wo kho gya, nyi tehzib mai amir logo k fatte kapdo mai wo kho gya. wo azadi k naam pe ladkiya ud chali adhe adhure kapdo mai, wo rishte mar gye jalan ki rakh Mai, videsi aa gye angrej chale gye. Sab chala gya dosti Mar gyi sabar tut gya dost ki behan ko dost hi lut raha. sab kho gya college k maidano Mai kise aam huye, mohabat k naam per kyi jisam nilam huye. Wo Ruth gya waqat yari ka daur chal pada makkari ka khanjar chote hai zakham gehre Hai. choti umar samabli nhi rang chada ishq ka. pyar Ho rahe 12ki umar Mai,bistar garam Ho rahe 14 ki sardi Mai,dil tut raha 16 ki rat ko. Kaise sambale koi is bigade halat ko. bhikhri hawas huyi ankho ki palkon mai kaise dikhe ab sachayi lafzon mai Ab to chala wo chala gya gya waqat suhana."

Aas jagi thi armano Mai dil jala hai toofano Mai.
Kuch gunj raha makano Mai kuch lut gya virano Mai.
Kuch tuta pathar kanch ka kuch pani jala Maikhano Mai.
Kuch bewafai k rang they kuch mere apne sang they.
Kuch lut lai gya wo chor kuch geet gata reh gya mor.
Kuch ansun bane asmannno mai,kuch badal barse samshano mai.
Kuch mohbat huyi azadi mai kuch tuta sapna barbadi Mai.
Kuch mera bachpan pas th, masum sa patang sath tha, kuch uda hawa jawani wo kata patang beimani Mai.
Kuch rutbe ki jung thi yaro ki masti sang thi.
Kuch seharo ki choriyon ki chal thi,gawon ki gori v Kya kamal thi,
kuch mera dil betab tha kuch uska chehra khas tha,waqat jawani ka ehsas tha hontho se hontho ka milan mithas tha.
Kuch manzil gustakh thi dur ho kar pas v thi. 
Kuch gehri chal dushman ki kuch mere pankh nadan they,
kuch chidi jung jwani ki jab yar mere kamaal the.
Kuch chunri ka parda tha,kuch noor ka shingar tha,
Wo mohale ki ladki ka nakhra v kamal tha.
Kuch lori gayi daadi ne kuch Dada ji k thath they wo v kya zamane they jab Bhai hote aath(8) they 
Kuch kadamo mai mitti thi, juban sabki chitti(white)thi,bharose ka karobar tha pag vat yar tha chunni vat saheli thi,muh boli maa thi muh boli mamta gali ki mayon ki,dudh sabka ek tha bacha v na koi fake tha.
sachayi ki kadar thi dilo Mai machi gaddar thi,
School kam they qabliyat mai Dam they,hisab pakke they chahe ungliyon pe ratte they. desh ghulam tha Leader nilam tha azadi k parwano ka fansi ko salam tha Wo bharat mera bohat mahan tha.
Kuch khule maidan they bail(ox)  kheto ki shaan they, kissan desh ki jaan they barsate sawan aam they,
Kheto Mai mehnat khoob thi,kat ti fasal lagte mele bhaisakhi mai  jhoomte wo kissano k  theley(bailgaadi).
Kuch maa ka anchal wo maa ka pyar,wo rota bachpan maa ka dular, kuch maa ki majburi maa ka kam.
 nipta k kam jab wo banati muje chand,wo mele Mai khilone ki zid wo Ruth k maa ka palu pakde gujarta waqat.
wo baap ka rutba, kuch baap ka dar, wo baap ka kandha bethe pakda mai uska sar, wo cycle ki seat wo chidiyon k ghar, kuch kache makan khula aangan,
wo rishtedaron k roshan they Mann wo apnapan,
wo chala gya wo kho gya, nyi tehzib mai amir logo k fatte kapdo mai wo kho gya.
wo azadi k naam pe ladkiya ud chali adhe adhure kapdo mai,
wo rishte mar gye jalan ki rakh Mai, videsi aa gye angrej chale gye.
Sab chala gya dosti Mar gyi sabar tut gya dost ki behan ko dost hi lut raha.
sab kho gya college k maidano Mai kise aam huye, mohabat k naam per kyi jisam nilam huye. Wo Ruth gya waqat yari ka daur chal pada makkari ka khanjar chote  hai zakham gehre Hai.
choti umar samabli nhi rang chada ishq ka.
pyar Ho rahe 12ki umar Mai,bistar garam Ho rahe 14 ki sardi Mai,dil tut raha 16 ki rat ko. Kaise sambale koi is bigade halat ko.
bhikhri hawas huyi ankho ki palkon mai kaise dikhe ab sachayi lafzon mai 
Ab to chala wo chala gya gya waqat suhana.

#openpoetry wo chala gya 🙏✍️aman6.1 kuch dil ki baat.

Aas jagi thi armano Mai dil jala hai toofano Mai.
Kuch gunj raha makano Mai kuch lut gya virano Mai.
Kuch tuta pathar kanch ka kuch pani jala Maikhano Mai.
Kuch bewafai k rang they kuch mere apne sang they.
Kuch lut lai gya wo chor kuch geet gata reh gya mor.
Kuch ansun bane asmannno mai,kuch badal barse samshano mai.

201 Love

"Tujhe Dil me Bsana bhi Zaroori tha, Tera Mujhse Door Jaana bhi Zaroori tha, Mohabbat bhi Jaroori thi, Bichadna bhi Zaroori tha, Teri Aankho ki in Khamoshiyoon me kho jaana bhi Zaroori tha, Teri Muskurat pe Mar jaana bhi Zaroori tha, Jo Dil me Bsaya tha Khwaab Tujhe leke, wo Mitana bhi Zaroori tha, Zaroori tha Hmara mil jaana, par Hum Ek ho na, ye Apnana bhi Zaroori tha, Dil ki jo Baat Tujhe na Bta paaya, Wo Raaz btana bhi Zaroori tha"

Tujhe Dil me Bsana bhi Zaroori tha,
Tera Mujhse Door Jaana bhi Zaroori tha,
Mohabbat bhi Jaroori thi,
Bichadna bhi Zaroori tha,
Teri Aankho ki in Khamoshiyoon me kho jaana bhi Zaroori tha,
Teri Muskurat pe Mar jaana bhi Zaroori tha,
Jo Dil me Bsaya tha Khwaab Tujhe leke,
wo Mitana bhi Zaroori tha,
Zaroori tha Hmara mil jaana,
par Hum Ek ho na,
ye Apnana bhi Zaroori tha,
Dil ki jo Baat Tujhe na Bta paaya,
Wo Raaz btana bhi Zaroori tha

#zaroori_tha #Love #nobita_ki_shizuka #shizuka_love

Tujhe Dil me Bsana bhi Zaroori tha,
Tera Mujhse Door Jaana bhi Zaroori tha,
Mohabbat bhi Jaroori thi,
Bichadna bhi Zaroori tha,
Teri Aankho ki in Khamoshiyoon me kho jaana bhi Zaroori tha,
Teri Muskurat pe Mar jaana bhi Zaroori tha,

16 Love

"Usne to pehle hi man lia tha Per apni kismat ko badlne Main aaj phir dodh nikla tha Anshu pouch ker uske mene Use has ker yeh bola tha Ki jeet lega tera aashiq- dil sabke Sirf tujhse hi preet karega Use hasa kar geet suna kar Main lehar sa nikal chuka tha Babander bane tufano me Main gote lga rha tha Thoda sehma thoda ghabraya Apne math par pahuch gya tha Na socha na samjha mene kuch Sidhe guhar lagai Ek banana hai hum dono ko Bss yahi biti aap sunai Sunker mere sabdo ko Woh kuch pighal gya tha Magar nahi ban sakta mera dil uska Usne yeh than liya tha Kachha dil tha mera bahut Yeh sun kar ro pada tha Ashu ban kar mere chehre se Wo yuhi beh rha tha Magar bidambana thi ab mere samne Ki Kese yeh satya bataye Na udh rahe the paav bhi mere Kese yeh gantavya tak jaye Toofani barish thi uss din Main phir bhi nikal pada tha Chalte chalte raho me Purane kisso ko soch rha tha Ja mila jo main pyaar se apne To na nazare mila paa rha tha Uss barsati paani me apne Main anshu chupa reha tha Woh bhi hans thi mere pyaar ki Usne paani me bhi ashu dundh nikale Or ashu chehre se hata kar Phir mere hath sambhale Boli pagle tu kyu rota hai Samaj ne hi sada jeet paayi Na milta yha koi premi hai Yeh preet hi sada chali ayi Yeh preet hi sada chali ayi....."

Usne to pehle hi man lia tha
Per apni kismat ko badlne
Main aaj phir dodh nikla tha
Anshu pouch ker uske mene
Use has ker yeh bola tha
Ki jeet lega tera aashiq- dil sabke
Sirf tujhse hi preet karega
Use hasa kar geet suna kar
Main lehar sa nikal chuka tha
Babander bane tufano me
Main gote lga rha tha
Thoda sehma thoda ghabraya
Apne math par pahuch gya tha
Na socha na samjha mene kuch
Sidhe guhar lagai
Ek banana hai hum dono ko
Bss yahi biti aap sunai
Sunker mere sabdo ko
Woh kuch pighal gya tha
Magar nahi ban sakta mera dil uska
Usne yeh than liya tha
Kachha dil tha mera bahut
Yeh sun kar ro pada tha
Ashu ban kar mere chehre se
Wo yuhi beh rha tha
Magar bidambana thi ab mere samne
Ki Kese yeh satya bataye
Na udh rahe the paav bhi mere
Kese yeh gantavya tak jaye
Toofani barish thi uss din
Main phir bhi nikal pada tha
Chalte chalte raho me
Purane kisso ko soch rha tha
Ja mila jo main pyaar se apne
To na nazare mila paa rha tha
Uss barsati paani me apne
Main anshu chupa reha tha
Woh bhi hans thi mere pyaar ki
Usne paani me bhi ashu dundh nikale
Or ashu chehre se hata kar
Phir mere hath sambhale
Boli pagle tu kyu rota hai
Samaj ne hi sada jeet paayi
Na milta yha koi premi hai
Yeh preet hi sada chali ayi
Yeh preet hi sada chali ayi.....

#DiarySeShayari #sugambirthare #lostlove #Lastlove #forever
#yehpreethisadachaliayi #Heart #Love

Kismat me nahi woh meri
Usne to pehle hi man lia tha
Per apni kismat ko badlne
Main aaj phir dodh nikla tha
Anshu pouch ker uske mene

7 Love

"Jindgi Achha khasa jivan chl rha tha apna. Haan, wo jivan jisme kewal padhai tha, dream tha ambition tha. Pr acchanak mere social media pr uska ek msg aya, usika msg jisko dekhne ke liye roz school jaya krte the barso pahle, pr bss dekhne ko, na to mujhe ussase kuchh kahna tha, na hi kuchh bat krni thi, mujhe abhi bhi yad hai ki uske class me ate hi dil aur dhakan ek ajeeb sa khel, khelne lgte the, pr ye silsila bahut jld hi khtm ho gya, wo school chorkr chli gyi aur mai khud me hi magrror ho gya. Kuchh 6 sal badd uska msg apne phn pe dekhna,ek yesi feeling thi jisko byan krne ke liye sayd mere pass sabd nhi hai. Mujhse mera phn nhi pkda jaa rha tha. Bole to mai bahut hi nervous tha aur uske upper se uska batt krne ka tarika mujhe aur nervous krr diya tha. Hr msg me tere ko, mere ko jaisa sbd aur mujhe yese batt krne ki adt nhi thi. Uss din kuchh 3 ghnte bate hui aur last me uska msg(bye forever) mujko itna hurt kiya, sayd utna kuchh ne v nhi kiya hoga. 1 ya do din fir usase bat kiya aur fir usase meri bat bnd ho gyi. Mai uska I'd hr jgh dhoondhne ki kosis krta, pr mujhe milta nhi. Mai new fb user tha, meri type krne ki speed itni kmm thi, sayd wo bore ho jati thi. Mai ussase bss batt krna chahta tha aur usko mere me koi interest nhi tha, sayd kisi aur me ho. Fir 3 ya 4 mahine badd uska koi msg aya, fir bate suru hui aur uske hostel jane tym fir bnd. Last talk yhi tha ki, sayd mai tumahre layk nhi hu, mujhse bat mtt krna byeforever. Sayd yhi wqt tha jbb mere andr ek yesa chij ka jnm, Jo mere liye sayd shi nhi hai, ego nd attitude.Deep inside uske liye pahli Barr yesi feeling ayi ki akhir khud ko samjhti kya hai!Sayd iska wajh ye bhi ho ki uss tym me kuchh ldkiya mujhe propose bhi kr chuki thi. Reason kuchh bhi ho maine ye decide kiya ki batt krna too dur iske bare me so chenge bhi nhi, maine agle 5 month uske bare me sochha tkk nhi pr iska mtlb ye nhi ki mai kisi aur ldki se seriously batt krne lga, fir se mai focused hokr kewal studies pr dhyan dene lgga. Fir 5 month badd maine apna fb khol a aur uska msg, kha ho yarr, mujhe tumse batt krni hai. Muumy kasam mai sab kuchh bhul gya, kahe ka ego kahe ka attitude. Iss dauran, wo apne life ka kuchh important bate mujhse share ki, pr mujhe to kewal ussase batt krna, uska batt sunna, issise mtlb tha.Aur fir hmari batt suru ho gyi, kuchh 4 ya 5 mahine tkk chla aur wo fir Delhi, ussase bat km hone lgi bole to almost bnd hogya. Aur mujhe bahut Taklif hota tha usase bate nhi hoti thi, ek yesa pain jo mai hi samjh skta hu. Mujhe yesa lgne lgga ki Delhi jakr wo mujhe bhul jayegi, kun satyam, kahe ka satyam. Bat nhi hone k wajh se ya kmm hone ke wjh se jb bhi batt hoti, mai shi se batt nhi krta. Mujhe yesa lgta, fir ye mujhse batt nhi karegi, issase achha abhi hi nhi kre. Aur deep down analysis kru to sayd ye wari tha jbb mai ussase expect krne lga tha. Care for me, replies 4 my msges and so on. Aur yhi suru hoti hmari nok jhnok. Mujhe yesa lgta tha ki she doesn't care for me, she doesn't treat me the same as I do 4 her. Aur treat kya krna 10 min achhe se bate hi to krni thi. Mai apna bahut kuchh uske samne express kr diya tha aur wo kuchh bhi nhi, Pr sayd usse ye nhi pta ki mai uske bare me jo sochta tha uska 10 percent bhi nhi kiya tha. Mujhe yesa lgne lga ki ye one sided hi chl rha hai. Aur yha se mere words kuchh hard hote gye, mai usko clearly bol deta ki mujhe tumse bat krni nhi hai, mujhse dur rho, aur kbhi wo block krti, to kbhi mai, aur kbhi mai unblock krta to kbhi wo. Blocking and unblocking kuchh dino tkk chla pr msg hmesa whi pahle krti thi. Mujhe smjh me nhi ata tha ki akhir ye chahti kya hai. Aur mere 12th ke exam aa gye. Iss tym pe bhi sab kuchh bhool kr mai ussase bat krta tha, kyunki ussase batt krna mujhe bahut achha lgta tha. Mujhse abhi yad hai math wale exam ke din ussase rat bhr bat kiya tha. Fir kuch dino badd hmari bat bnd ho gyi aur mai dehradoon chla aya. Fir mere 12th ke results aye, 74%only.Mujhe itni frustration hoti thi ki rato me neend nhi ati thi. Iss phase me mera frustration kewal do chhej hi door kr sakta tha. First wine nd next her. I cant drink cause I have promised to mmy that I will never. Maine bahut try kiya ki ussase batt n kro pr maine kiya, nd this tym it's 4 me. Dehradoon me jb hmari batt hone lgi to first time mujhe yesa realise hua ki she has equal intrest in myself. I was really happy. Every thing was going good. Aur fir ek wqt aya hmari fir se ldai ho gyi, sab ldai ke pichhe ek hi reason, uska reply na dena, ya uska mere se batt na krna, aur iss wari maine decide kr liya tha, Bahut ho gya, now let's, Move on. Maine usko kuchh yese words bole the, Jo sayd mujhe nhi bolne chahiye the. Fir 6 ya 7 mahine badd, she send me fb request. I have missed her lot in this period. Mai request accept kr liya. Firse usko mnana, Jo ki mera habbit ho gya tha. Hr fight ke badd jb wo msg krti, to mai wo kuchh bkk deta, Jo uske bina krta. Fir bate hone lgi. Uska 12th ka paper tha, iss bichh bhi fight hui but she have asked me to be there during her 12th, nd hopefully I was. And again we do the same. Kuchh dino badd 12th ka result aya, iss wari itne bure din aye the ki maine ek dusre ldke ke namm se insta I'd bnayi aur result jnana ki kosis ki but she caught me saying that I can recognise you anytime. Fir maine apne nam se I'd bnaya uska result puchha kuchh achhi achhi bate ki aur MN hi MN ye socha ki finally the end which should have been is going to be on a good note. Fir maine wo I'd delete kr diya. Fir maine ussase contact krne ki kbhi kosis nhi ki. Usko to ye sab yad bhi nhi hoga jitna maine likh diya hai aur accept bhi krta qunki ye meri story hai uski nhi. So here the first nd probably the last story of my life comes at its fence. Good by (Sr. 5 July 2019)"

Jindgi
Achha khasa jivan chl rha tha apna. Haan, wo jivan jisme kewal padhai tha, dream tha ambition tha. Pr acchanak mere social media pr uska ek msg aya, usika msg jisko dekhne ke liye roz school jaya krte the barso pahle, pr bss dekhne ko, na to mujhe ussase kuchh kahna tha, na hi kuchh bat krni thi, mujhe abhi bhi yad hai ki uske class me ate hi dil aur dhakan ek ajeeb sa khel, khelne lgte the, pr ye silsila bahut jld hi khtm ho gya, wo school chorkr chli gyi aur mai khud me hi magrror ho gya. Kuchh 6 sal badd uska msg apne phn pe dekhna,ek yesi feeling thi jisko byan krne ke liye sayd mere pass sabd nhi hai. Mujhse mera phn nhi pkda jaa rha tha. Bole to mai bahut hi nervous tha aur uske upper se uska batt krne ka tarika mujhe aur nervous krr diya tha. Hr msg me tere ko, mere ko jaisa sbd aur mujhe yese batt krne ki adt nhi thi. Uss din kuchh 3 ghnte bate hui aur last me uska msg(bye forever) mujko itna hurt kiya, sayd utna kuchh ne v nhi kiya hoga. 1 ya do din fir usase bat kiya aur fir usase meri bat bnd ho gyi. Mai uska I'd hr jgh dhoondhne ki kosis krta, pr mujhe milta nhi. Mai new fb user tha, meri type krne ki speed itni kmm thi, sayd wo bore ho jati thi. Mai ussase  bss batt krna chahta tha aur usko mere me koi interest nhi tha, sayd kisi aur me ho. Fir 3 ya 4 mahine badd uska koi msg aya, fir bate suru hui aur uske hostel jane tym fir bnd. Last talk yhi tha ki, sayd mai tumahre layk nhi hu, mujhse bat mtt krna byeforever. Sayd yhi wqt tha jbb mere andr ek yesa chij ka jnm, Jo mere liye sayd shi nhi hai, ego nd attitude.Deep inside uske liye pahli Barr yesi feeling ayi ki akhir khud ko samjhti kya hai!Sayd iska wajh ye bhi ho ki uss tym me kuchh ldkiya mujhe propose bhi kr chuki thi. Reason kuchh bhi ho maine ye decide kiya ki batt krna too dur iske bare me so chenge bhi nhi, maine agle 5 month uske bare me sochha tkk nhi pr iska mtlb ye nhi ki mai kisi aur ldki se seriously batt krne lga, fir se mai focused hokr kewal studies pr dhyan dene lgga. Fir 5 month badd maine apna fb khol a aur uska msg, kha ho yarr, mujhe tumse batt krni hai. Muumy kasam mai sab kuchh bhul gya, kahe ka ego kahe ka attitude. Iss dauran, wo apne life ka kuchh important bate mujhse share ki, pr mujhe to kewal ussase batt krna, uska batt sunna, issise mtlb tha.Aur fir hmari batt suru ho gyi, kuchh 4 ya 5 mahine tkk chla aur wo fir Delhi, ussase bat km hone lgi bole to almost bnd hogya. Aur mujhe bahut Taklif hota tha usase bate nhi hoti thi, ek yesa pain jo mai hi samjh skta hu. Mujhe yesa lgne lgga ki Delhi jakr wo mujhe bhul jayegi, kun satyam, kahe ka satyam. Bat nhi hone k wajh se ya kmm hone ke wjh se jb bhi batt hoti, mai shi se batt nhi krta. Mujhe yesa lgta, fir ye mujhse batt nhi karegi, issase achha abhi hi nhi kre. Aur deep down analysis kru to sayd ye wari tha jbb mai ussase expect krne lga tha. Care for me, replies 4 my msges and so on. Aur yhi suru hoti hmari nok jhnok. Mujhe yesa lgta tha ki she doesn't care for me, she doesn't treat me the same as I do 4 her. Aur treat kya krna 10 min achhe se bate hi to krni thi. Mai apna bahut kuchh uske samne express kr diya tha aur wo kuchh bhi nhi, Pr sayd usse ye nhi pta ki mai uske bare me jo sochta tha uska 10 percent bhi nhi kiya tha. Mujhe yesa lgne lga ki ye one sided hi chl rha hai. Aur yha se mere words kuchh hard hote gye, mai usko clearly bol deta ki mujhe tumse bat krni nhi hai, mujhse dur rho, aur kbhi wo block krti, to kbhi mai, aur kbhi mai unblock krta to kbhi wo. Blocking and unblocking kuchh dino tkk chla pr msg hmesa whi pahle krti thi. Mujhe smjh me nhi ata tha ki akhir ye chahti kya hai. Aur mere 12th ke exam aa gye. Iss tym pe bhi sab kuchh bhool kr mai ussase bat krta tha, kyunki ussase batt krna mujhe bahut achha lgta tha. Mujhse abhi yad hai math wale exam ke din ussase rat bhr bat kiya tha. Fir kuch dino badd hmari bat bnd ho gyi aur mai dehradoon chla aya. Fir mere 12th ke results aye, 74%only.Mujhe itni frustration hoti thi ki rato me neend nhi ati thi. Iss phase me mera frustration kewal do chhej hi door kr sakta tha. First wine nd next her. I cant drink cause I have promised to mmy that I will never. Maine bahut try kiya ki ussase batt n kro pr maine kiya, nd this tym  it's 4 me. Dehradoon me jb hmari batt hone lgi to first time mujhe yesa realise hua ki she has equal intrest in myself. I was really happy. Every thing was going good. Aur fir ek wqt aya hmari fir se ldai ho gyi, sab ldai ke pichhe ek hi reason, uska reply na dena, ya uska mere se batt na krna, aur iss wari maine decide kr liya tha, Bahut ho gya, now let's, Move on. Maine usko kuchh yese words bole the, Jo sayd mujhe nhi bolne chahiye the. Fir 6 ya 7 mahine badd, she send me fb request. I have missed her lot in this period. Mai request accept kr liya. Firse usko mnana, Jo ki mera habbit ho gya tha. Hr fight ke badd jb wo msg krti, to mai wo kuchh bkk deta, Jo uske bina krta. Fir bate hone lgi. Uska 12th ka paper tha, iss bichh bhi fight hui  but she have asked me to be there during her 12th, nd hopefully I was. And again we do the same. Kuchh dino badd 12th ka result aya, iss wari itne bure din aye the ki maine ek dusre ldke ke namm se insta I'd bnayi aur result jnana ki kosis ki but she caught me saying that I can recognise you anytime. Fir maine apne nam se I'd bnaya uska result puchha kuchh achhi achhi bate ki aur MN hi MN ye socha ki finally the end which should have been is going to be on a good note. Fir maine wo I'd delete kr diya. Fir maine ussase contact krne ki kbhi kosis nhi ki. Usko to ye sab yad bhi nhi hoga jitna maine likh diya hai aur accept bhi krta qunki ye meri story hai uski nhi. So here the first nd probably the last story of my life comes at its fence.
Good by (Sr. 5 July 2019)

A untold story of a star

8 Love

#mylove #Nojoto #truelovestory #yourquote #storytelling #Poetry



Kahaniya upar wala likhta hai or hum sab uske kirdaar hai iska yakin muje hua par both waqt baad
Meri kahani mai sirf teen kirdaar hai ye koi love tringle to nahi par usse kam bhi nahi tha
Muje yaad hai jab maine 2013 June mai apna naya office join kiya us waqt mai already 5 saal se relationship mai tha vo relationship aisa tha jiski shruat bhi kisi kahani se kam nahi thi par agar mai usse btaane lag jaau to shayad ik puri kita

10 Love
2 Share

"Aas jagi thi armano Mai dil jala hai toofano Mai. Kuch gunj raha makano Mai kuch lut gya virano Mai. Kuch tuta pathar kanch ka kuch pani jala Maikhano Mai. Kuch bewafai k rang they kuch mere apne sang they. Kuch lut lai gya wo chor kuch geet gata reh gya mor. Kuch ansun bane asmannno mai,kuch badal barse samshano mai. Kuch mohbat huyi azadi mai kuch tuta sapna barbadi Mai. Kuch mera bachpan pas th, masum sa patang sath tha, kuch uda hawa jawani wo kata patang beimani Mai. Kuch rutbe ki jung thi yaro ki masti sang thi. Kuch seharo ki choriyon ki chal thi,gawon ki gori v Kya kamal thi, kuch mera dil betab tha kuch uska chehra khas tha,waqat jawani ka ehsas tha hontho se hontho ka milan mithas tha. Kuch manzil gustakh thi dur ho kar pas v thi. Kuch gehri chal dushman ki kuch mere pankh nadan they, kuch chidi jung jwani ki jab yar mere kamaal the. Kuch chunri ka parda tha,kuch noor ka shingar tha, Wo mohale ki ladki ka nakhra v kamal tha. Kuch lori gayi daadi ne kuch Dada ji k thath they wo v kya zamane they jab Bhai hote aath(8) they Kuch kadamo mai mitti thi, juban sabki chitti(white)thi,bharose ka karobar tha pag vat yar tha chunni vat saheli thi,muh boli maa thi muh boli mamta gali ki mayon ki,dudh sabka ek tha bacha v na koi fake tha. sachayi ki kadar thi dilo Mai machi gaddar thi, School kam they qabliyat mai Dam they,hisab pakke they chahe ungliyon pe ratte they. desh ghulam tha Leader nilam tha azadi k parwano ka fansi ko salam tha Wo bharat mera bohat mahan tha. Kuch khule maidan they bail(ox) kheto ki shaan they, kissan desh ki jaan they barsate sawan aam they, Kheto Mai mehnat khoob thi,kat ti fasal lagte mele bhaisakhi mai jhoomte wo kissano k theley(bailgaadi). Kuch maa ka anchal wo maa ka pyar,wo rota bachpan maa ka dular, kuch maa ki majburi maa ka kam. nipta k kam jab wo banati muje chand,wo mele Mai khilone ki zid wo Ruth k maa ka palu pakde gujarta waqat. wo baap ka rutba, kuch baap ka dar, wo baap ka kandha bethe pakda mai uska sar, wo cycle ki seat wo chidiyon k ghar, kuch kache makan khula aangan, wo rishtedaron k roshan they Mann wo apnapan, wo chala gya wo kho gya, nyi tehzib mai amir logo k fatte kapdo mai wo kho gya. wo azadi k naam pe ladkiya ud chali adhe adhure kapdo mai, wo rishte mar gye jalan ki rakh Mai, videsi aa gye angrej chale gye. Sab chala gya dosti Mar gyi sabar tut gya dost ki behan ko dost hi lut raha. sab kho gya college k maidano Mai kise aam huye, mohabat k naam per kyi jisam nilam huye. Wo Ruth gya waqat yari ka daur chal pada makkari ka khanjar chote hai zakham gehre Hai. choti umar samabli nhi rang chada ishq ka. pyar Ho rahe 12ki umar Mai,bistar garam Ho rahe 14 ki sardi Mai,dil tut raha 16 ki rat ko. Kaise sambale koi is bigade halat ko. bhikhri hawas huyi ankho ki palkon mai kaise dikhe ab sachayi lafzon mai Ab to chala wo chala gya gya waqat suhana."

Aas jagi thi armano Mai dil jala hai toofano Mai.
Kuch gunj raha makano Mai kuch lut gya virano Mai.
Kuch tuta pathar kanch ka kuch pani jala Maikhano Mai.
Kuch bewafai k rang they kuch mere apne sang they.
Kuch lut lai gya wo chor kuch geet gata reh gya mor.
Kuch ansun bane asmannno mai,kuch badal barse samshano mai.
Kuch mohbat huyi azadi mai kuch tuta sapna barbadi Mai.
Kuch mera bachpan pas th, masum sa patang sath tha, kuch uda hawa jawani wo kata patang beimani Mai.
Kuch rutbe ki jung thi yaro ki masti sang thi.
Kuch seharo ki choriyon ki chal thi,gawon ki gori v Kya kamal thi,
kuch mera dil betab tha kuch uska chehra khas tha,waqat jawani ka ehsas tha hontho se hontho ka milan mithas tha.
Kuch manzil gustakh thi dur ho kar pas v thi. 
Kuch gehri chal dushman ki kuch mere pankh nadan they,
kuch chidi jung jwani ki jab yar mere kamaal the.
Kuch chunri ka parda tha,kuch noor ka shingar tha,
Wo mohale ki ladki ka nakhra v kamal tha.
Kuch lori gayi daadi ne kuch Dada ji k thath they wo v kya zamane they jab Bhai hote aath(8) they 
Kuch kadamo mai mitti thi, juban sabki chitti(white)thi,bharose ka karobar tha pag vat yar tha chunni vat saheli thi,muh boli maa thi muh boli mamta gali ki mayon ki,dudh sabka ek tha bacha v na koi fake tha.
sachayi ki kadar thi dilo Mai machi gaddar thi,
School kam they qabliyat mai Dam they,hisab pakke they chahe ungliyon pe ratte they. desh ghulam tha Leader nilam tha azadi k parwano ka fansi ko salam tha Wo bharat mera bohat mahan tha.
Kuch khule maidan they bail(ox)  kheto ki shaan they, kissan desh ki jaan they barsate sawan aam they,
Kheto Mai mehnat khoob thi,kat ti fasal lagte mele bhaisakhi mai  jhoomte wo kissano k  theley(bailgaadi).
Kuch maa ka anchal wo maa ka pyar,wo rota bachpan maa ka dular, kuch maa ki majburi maa ka kam.
 nipta k kam jab wo banati muje chand,wo mele Mai khilone ki zid wo Ruth k maa ka palu pakde gujarta waqat.
wo baap ka rutba, kuch baap ka dar, wo baap ka kandha bethe pakda mai uska sar, wo cycle ki seat wo chidiyon k ghar, kuch kache makan khula aangan,
wo rishtedaron k roshan they Mann wo apnapan,
wo chala gya wo kho gya, nyi tehzib mai amir logo k fatte kapdo mai wo kho gya.
wo azadi k naam pe ladkiya ud chali adhe adhure kapdo mai,
wo rishte mar gye jalan ki rakh Mai, videsi aa gye angrej chale gye.
Sab chala gya dosti Mar gyi sabar tut gya dost ki behan ko dost hi lut raha.
sab kho gya college k maidano Mai kise aam huye, mohabat k naam per kyi jisam nilam huye. Wo Ruth gya waqat yari ka daur chal pada makkari ka khanjar chote  hai zakham gehre Hai.
choti umar samabli nhi rang chada ishq ka.
pyar Ho rahe 12ki umar Mai,bistar garam Ho rahe 14 ki sardi Mai,dil tut raha 16 ki rat ko. Kaise sambale koi is bigade halat ko.
bhikhri hawas huyi ankho ki palkon mai kaise dikhe ab sachayi lafzon mai 
Ab to chala wo chala gya gya waqat suhana.

#openpoetry wo chala gya 🙏✍️aman6.1 kuch dil ki baat.

Aas jagi thi armano Mai dil jala hai toofano Mai.
Kuch gunj raha makano Mai kuch lut gya virano Mai.
Kuch tuta pathar kanch ka kuch pani jala Maikhano Mai.
Kuch bewafai k rang they kuch mere apne sang they.
Kuch lut lai gya wo chor kuch geet gata reh gya mor.
Kuch ansun bane asmannno mai,kuch badal barse samshano mai.

201 Love

"Tujhe Dil me Bsana bhi Zaroori tha, Tera Mujhse Door Jaana bhi Zaroori tha, Mohabbat bhi Jaroori thi, Bichadna bhi Zaroori tha, Teri Aankho ki in Khamoshiyoon me kho jaana bhi Zaroori tha, Teri Muskurat pe Mar jaana bhi Zaroori tha, Jo Dil me Bsaya tha Khwaab Tujhe leke, wo Mitana bhi Zaroori tha, Zaroori tha Hmara mil jaana, par Hum Ek ho na, ye Apnana bhi Zaroori tha, Dil ki jo Baat Tujhe na Bta paaya, Wo Raaz btana bhi Zaroori tha"

Tujhe Dil me Bsana bhi Zaroori tha,
Tera Mujhse Door Jaana bhi Zaroori tha,
Mohabbat bhi Jaroori thi,
Bichadna bhi Zaroori tha,
Teri Aankho ki in Khamoshiyoon me kho jaana bhi Zaroori tha,
Teri Muskurat pe Mar jaana bhi Zaroori tha,
Jo Dil me Bsaya tha Khwaab Tujhe leke,
wo Mitana bhi Zaroori tha,
Zaroori tha Hmara mil jaana,
par Hum Ek ho na,
ye Apnana bhi Zaroori tha,
Dil ki jo Baat Tujhe na Bta paaya,
Wo Raaz btana bhi Zaroori tha

#zaroori_tha #Love #nobita_ki_shizuka #shizuka_love

Tujhe Dil me Bsana bhi Zaroori tha,
Tera Mujhse Door Jaana bhi Zaroori tha,
Mohabbat bhi Jaroori thi,
Bichadna bhi Zaroori tha,
Teri Aankho ki in Khamoshiyoon me kho jaana bhi Zaroori tha,
Teri Muskurat pe Mar jaana bhi Zaroori tha,

16 Love

"Usne to pehle hi man lia tha Per apni kismat ko badlne Main aaj phir dodh nikla tha Anshu pouch ker uske mene Use has ker yeh bola tha Ki jeet lega tera aashiq- dil sabke Sirf tujhse hi preet karega Use hasa kar geet suna kar Main lehar sa nikal chuka tha Babander bane tufano me Main gote lga rha tha Thoda sehma thoda ghabraya Apne math par pahuch gya tha Na socha na samjha mene kuch Sidhe guhar lagai Ek banana hai hum dono ko Bss yahi biti aap sunai Sunker mere sabdo ko Woh kuch pighal gya tha Magar nahi ban sakta mera dil uska Usne yeh than liya tha Kachha dil tha mera bahut Yeh sun kar ro pada tha Ashu ban kar mere chehre se Wo yuhi beh rha tha Magar bidambana thi ab mere samne Ki Kese yeh satya bataye Na udh rahe the paav bhi mere Kese yeh gantavya tak jaye Toofani barish thi uss din Main phir bhi nikal pada tha Chalte chalte raho me Purane kisso ko soch rha tha Ja mila jo main pyaar se apne To na nazare mila paa rha tha Uss barsati paani me apne Main anshu chupa reha tha Woh bhi hans thi mere pyaar ki Usne paani me bhi ashu dundh nikale Or ashu chehre se hata kar Phir mere hath sambhale Boli pagle tu kyu rota hai Samaj ne hi sada jeet paayi Na milta yha koi premi hai Yeh preet hi sada chali ayi Yeh preet hi sada chali ayi....."

Usne to pehle hi man lia tha
Per apni kismat ko badlne
Main aaj phir dodh nikla tha
Anshu pouch ker uske mene
Use has ker yeh bola tha
Ki jeet lega tera aashiq- dil sabke
Sirf tujhse hi preet karega
Use hasa kar geet suna kar
Main lehar sa nikal chuka tha
Babander bane tufano me
Main gote lga rha tha
Thoda sehma thoda ghabraya
Apne math par pahuch gya tha
Na socha na samjha mene kuch
Sidhe guhar lagai
Ek banana hai hum dono ko
Bss yahi biti aap sunai
Sunker mere sabdo ko
Woh kuch pighal gya tha
Magar nahi ban sakta mera dil uska
Usne yeh than liya tha
Kachha dil tha mera bahut
Yeh sun kar ro pada tha
Ashu ban kar mere chehre se
Wo yuhi beh rha tha
Magar bidambana thi ab mere samne
Ki Kese yeh satya bataye
Na udh rahe the paav bhi mere
Kese yeh gantavya tak jaye
Toofani barish thi uss din
Main phir bhi nikal pada tha
Chalte chalte raho me
Purane kisso ko soch rha tha
Ja mila jo main pyaar se apne
To na nazare mila paa rha tha
Uss barsati paani me apne
Main anshu chupa reha tha
Woh bhi hans thi mere pyaar ki
Usne paani me bhi ashu dundh nikale
Or ashu chehre se hata kar
Phir mere hath sambhale
Boli pagle tu kyu rota hai
Samaj ne hi sada jeet paayi
Na milta yha koi premi hai
Yeh preet hi sada chali ayi
Yeh preet hi sada chali ayi.....

#DiarySeShayari #sugambirthare #lostlove #Lastlove #forever
#yehpreethisadachaliayi #Heart #Love

Kismat me nahi woh meri
Usne to pehle hi man lia tha
Per apni kismat ko badlne
Main aaj phir dodh nikla tha
Anshu pouch ker uske mene

7 Love

"Jindgi Achha khasa jivan chl rha tha apna. Haan, wo jivan jisme kewal padhai tha, dream tha ambition tha. Pr acchanak mere social media pr uska ek msg aya, usika msg jisko dekhne ke liye roz school jaya krte the barso pahle, pr bss dekhne ko, na to mujhe ussase kuchh kahna tha, na hi kuchh bat krni thi, mujhe abhi bhi yad hai ki uske class me ate hi dil aur dhakan ek ajeeb sa khel, khelne lgte the, pr ye silsila bahut jld hi khtm ho gya, wo school chorkr chli gyi aur mai khud me hi magrror ho gya. Kuchh 6 sal badd uska msg apne phn pe dekhna,ek yesi feeling thi jisko byan krne ke liye sayd mere pass sabd nhi hai. Mujhse mera phn nhi pkda jaa rha tha. Bole to mai bahut hi nervous tha aur uske upper se uska batt krne ka tarika mujhe aur nervous krr diya tha. Hr msg me tere ko, mere ko jaisa sbd aur mujhe yese batt krne ki adt nhi thi. Uss din kuchh 3 ghnte bate hui aur last me uska msg(bye forever) mujko itna hurt kiya, sayd utna kuchh ne v nhi kiya hoga. 1 ya do din fir usase bat kiya aur fir usase meri bat bnd ho gyi. Mai uska I'd hr jgh dhoondhne ki kosis krta, pr mujhe milta nhi. Mai new fb user tha, meri type krne ki speed itni kmm thi, sayd wo bore ho jati thi. Mai ussase bss batt krna chahta tha aur usko mere me koi interest nhi tha, sayd kisi aur me ho. Fir 3 ya 4 mahine badd uska koi msg aya, fir bate suru hui aur uske hostel jane tym fir bnd. Last talk yhi tha ki, sayd mai tumahre layk nhi hu, mujhse bat mtt krna byeforever. Sayd yhi wqt tha jbb mere andr ek yesa chij ka jnm, Jo mere liye sayd shi nhi hai, ego nd attitude.Deep inside uske liye pahli Barr yesi feeling ayi ki akhir khud ko samjhti kya hai!Sayd iska wajh ye bhi ho ki uss tym me kuchh ldkiya mujhe propose bhi kr chuki thi. Reason kuchh bhi ho maine ye decide kiya ki batt krna too dur iske bare me so chenge bhi nhi, maine agle 5 month uske bare me sochha tkk nhi pr iska mtlb ye nhi ki mai kisi aur ldki se seriously batt krne lga, fir se mai focused hokr kewal studies pr dhyan dene lgga. Fir 5 month badd maine apna fb khol a aur uska msg, kha ho yarr, mujhe tumse batt krni hai. Muumy kasam mai sab kuchh bhul gya, kahe ka ego kahe ka attitude. Iss dauran, wo apne life ka kuchh important bate mujhse share ki, pr mujhe to kewal ussase batt krna, uska batt sunna, issise mtlb tha.Aur fir hmari batt suru ho gyi, kuchh 4 ya 5 mahine tkk chla aur wo fir Delhi, ussase bat km hone lgi bole to almost bnd hogya. Aur mujhe bahut Taklif hota tha usase bate nhi hoti thi, ek yesa pain jo mai hi samjh skta hu. Mujhe yesa lgne lgga ki Delhi jakr wo mujhe bhul jayegi, kun satyam, kahe ka satyam. Bat nhi hone k wajh se ya kmm hone ke wjh se jb bhi batt hoti, mai shi se batt nhi krta. Mujhe yesa lgta, fir ye mujhse batt nhi karegi, issase achha abhi hi nhi kre. Aur deep down analysis kru to sayd ye wari tha jbb mai ussase expect krne lga tha. Care for me, replies 4 my msges and so on. Aur yhi suru hoti hmari nok jhnok. Mujhe yesa lgta tha ki she doesn't care for me, she doesn't treat me the same as I do 4 her. Aur treat kya krna 10 min achhe se bate hi to krni thi. Mai apna bahut kuchh uske samne express kr diya tha aur wo kuchh bhi nhi, Pr sayd usse ye nhi pta ki mai uske bare me jo sochta tha uska 10 percent bhi nhi kiya tha. Mujhe yesa lgne lga ki ye one sided hi chl rha hai. Aur yha se mere words kuchh hard hote gye, mai usko clearly bol deta ki mujhe tumse bat krni nhi hai, mujhse dur rho, aur kbhi wo block krti, to kbhi mai, aur kbhi mai unblock krta to kbhi wo. Blocking and unblocking kuchh dino tkk chla pr msg hmesa whi pahle krti thi. Mujhe smjh me nhi ata tha ki akhir ye chahti kya hai. Aur mere 12th ke exam aa gye. Iss tym pe bhi sab kuchh bhool kr mai ussase bat krta tha, kyunki ussase batt krna mujhe bahut achha lgta tha. Mujhse abhi yad hai math wale exam ke din ussase rat bhr bat kiya tha. Fir kuch dino badd hmari bat bnd ho gyi aur mai dehradoon chla aya. Fir mere 12th ke results aye, 74%only.Mujhe itni frustration hoti thi ki rato me neend nhi ati thi. Iss phase me mera frustration kewal do chhej hi door kr sakta tha. First wine nd next her. I cant drink cause I have promised to mmy that I will never. Maine bahut try kiya ki ussase batt n kro pr maine kiya, nd this tym it's 4 me. Dehradoon me jb hmari batt hone lgi to first time mujhe yesa realise hua ki she has equal intrest in myself. I was really happy. Every thing was going good. Aur fir ek wqt aya hmari fir se ldai ho gyi, sab ldai ke pichhe ek hi reason, uska reply na dena, ya uska mere se batt na krna, aur iss wari maine decide kr liya tha, Bahut ho gya, now let's, Move on. Maine usko kuchh yese words bole the, Jo sayd mujhe nhi bolne chahiye the. Fir 6 ya 7 mahine badd, she send me fb request. I have missed her lot in this period. Mai request accept kr liya. Firse usko mnana, Jo ki mera habbit ho gya tha. Hr fight ke badd jb wo msg krti, to mai wo kuchh bkk deta, Jo uske bina krta. Fir bate hone lgi. Uska 12th ka paper tha, iss bichh bhi fight hui but she have asked me to be there during her 12th, nd hopefully I was. And again we do the same. Kuchh dino badd 12th ka result aya, iss wari itne bure din aye the ki maine ek dusre ldke ke namm se insta I'd bnayi aur result jnana ki kosis ki but she caught me saying that I can recognise you anytime. Fir maine apne nam se I'd bnaya uska result puchha kuchh achhi achhi bate ki aur MN hi MN ye socha ki finally the end which should have been is going to be on a good note. Fir maine wo I'd delete kr diya. Fir maine ussase contact krne ki kbhi kosis nhi ki. Usko to ye sab yad bhi nhi hoga jitna maine likh diya hai aur accept bhi krta qunki ye meri story hai uski nhi. So here the first nd probably the last story of my life comes at its fence. Good by (Sr. 5 July 2019)"

Jindgi
Achha khasa jivan chl rha tha apna. Haan, wo jivan jisme kewal padhai tha, dream tha ambition tha. Pr acchanak mere social media pr uska ek msg aya, usika msg jisko dekhne ke liye roz school jaya krte the barso pahle, pr bss dekhne ko, na to mujhe ussase kuchh kahna tha, na hi kuchh bat krni thi, mujhe abhi bhi yad hai ki uske class me ate hi dil aur dhakan ek ajeeb sa khel, khelne lgte the, pr ye silsila bahut jld hi khtm ho gya, wo school chorkr chli gyi aur mai khud me hi magrror ho gya. Kuchh 6 sal badd uska msg apne phn pe dekhna,ek yesi feeling thi jisko byan krne ke liye sayd mere pass sabd nhi hai. Mujhse mera phn nhi pkda jaa rha tha. Bole to mai bahut hi nervous tha aur uske upper se uska batt krne ka tarika mujhe aur nervous krr diya tha. Hr msg me tere ko, mere ko jaisa sbd aur mujhe yese batt krne ki adt nhi thi. Uss din kuchh 3 ghnte bate hui aur last me uska msg(bye forever) mujko itna hurt kiya, sayd utna kuchh ne v nhi kiya hoga. 1 ya do din fir usase bat kiya aur fir usase meri bat bnd ho gyi. Mai uska I'd hr jgh dhoondhne ki kosis krta, pr mujhe milta nhi. Mai new fb user tha, meri type krne ki speed itni kmm thi, sayd wo bore ho jati thi. Mai ussase  bss batt krna chahta tha aur usko mere me koi interest nhi tha, sayd kisi aur me ho. Fir 3 ya 4 mahine badd uska koi msg aya, fir bate suru hui aur uske hostel jane tym fir bnd. Last talk yhi tha ki, sayd mai tumahre layk nhi hu, mujhse bat mtt krna byeforever. Sayd yhi wqt tha jbb mere andr ek yesa chij ka jnm, Jo mere liye sayd shi nhi hai, ego nd attitude.Deep inside uske liye pahli Barr yesi feeling ayi ki akhir khud ko samjhti kya hai!Sayd iska wajh ye bhi ho ki uss tym me kuchh ldkiya mujhe propose bhi kr chuki thi. Reason kuchh bhi ho maine ye decide kiya ki batt krna too dur iske bare me so chenge bhi nhi, maine agle 5 month uske bare me sochha tkk nhi pr iska mtlb ye nhi ki mai kisi aur ldki se seriously batt krne lga, fir se mai focused hokr kewal studies pr dhyan dene lgga. Fir 5 month badd maine apna fb khol a aur uska msg, kha ho yarr, mujhe tumse batt krni hai. Muumy kasam mai sab kuchh bhul gya, kahe ka ego kahe ka attitude. Iss dauran, wo apne life ka kuchh important bate mujhse share ki, pr mujhe to kewal ussase batt krna, uska batt sunna, issise mtlb tha.Aur fir hmari batt suru ho gyi, kuchh 4 ya 5 mahine tkk chla aur wo fir Delhi, ussase bat km hone lgi bole to almost bnd hogya. Aur mujhe bahut Taklif hota tha usase bate nhi hoti thi, ek yesa pain jo mai hi samjh skta hu. Mujhe yesa lgne lgga ki Delhi jakr wo mujhe bhul jayegi, kun satyam, kahe ka satyam. Bat nhi hone k wajh se ya kmm hone ke wjh se jb bhi batt hoti, mai shi se batt nhi krta. Mujhe yesa lgta, fir ye mujhse batt nhi karegi, issase achha abhi hi nhi kre. Aur deep down analysis kru to sayd ye wari tha jbb mai ussase expect krne lga tha. Care for me, replies 4 my msges and so on. Aur yhi suru hoti hmari nok jhnok. Mujhe yesa lgta tha ki she doesn't care for me, she doesn't treat me the same as I do 4 her. Aur treat kya krna 10 min achhe se bate hi to krni thi. Mai apna bahut kuchh uske samne express kr diya tha aur wo kuchh bhi nhi, Pr sayd usse ye nhi pta ki mai uske bare me jo sochta tha uska 10 percent bhi nhi kiya tha. Mujhe yesa lgne lga ki ye one sided hi chl rha hai. Aur yha se mere words kuchh hard hote gye, mai usko clearly bol deta ki mujhe tumse bat krni nhi hai, mujhse dur rho, aur kbhi wo block krti, to kbhi mai, aur kbhi mai unblock krta to kbhi wo. Blocking and unblocking kuchh dino tkk chla pr msg hmesa whi pahle krti thi. Mujhe smjh me nhi ata tha ki akhir ye chahti kya hai. Aur mere 12th ke exam aa gye. Iss tym pe bhi sab kuchh bhool kr mai ussase bat krta tha, kyunki ussase batt krna mujhe bahut achha lgta tha. Mujhse abhi yad hai math wale exam ke din ussase rat bhr bat kiya tha. Fir kuch dino badd hmari bat bnd ho gyi aur mai dehradoon chla aya. Fir mere 12th ke results aye, 74%only.Mujhe itni frustration hoti thi ki rato me neend nhi ati thi. Iss phase me mera frustration kewal do chhej hi door kr sakta tha. First wine nd next her. I cant drink cause I have promised to mmy that I will never. Maine bahut try kiya ki ussase batt n kro pr maine kiya, nd this tym  it's 4 me. Dehradoon me jb hmari batt hone lgi to first time mujhe yesa realise hua ki she has equal intrest in myself. I was really happy. Every thing was going good. Aur fir ek wqt aya hmari fir se ldai ho gyi, sab ldai ke pichhe ek hi reason, uska reply na dena, ya uska mere se batt na krna, aur iss wari maine decide kr liya tha, Bahut ho gya, now let's, Move on. Maine usko kuchh yese words bole the, Jo sayd mujhe nhi bolne chahiye the. Fir 6 ya 7 mahine badd, she send me fb request. I have missed her lot in this period. Mai request accept kr liya. Firse usko mnana, Jo ki mera habbit ho gya tha. Hr fight ke badd jb wo msg krti, to mai wo kuchh bkk deta, Jo uske bina krta. Fir bate hone lgi. Uska 12th ka paper tha, iss bichh bhi fight hui  but she have asked me to be there during her 12th, nd hopefully I was. And again we do the same. Kuchh dino badd 12th ka result aya, iss wari itne bure din aye the ki maine ek dusre ldke ke namm se insta I'd bnayi aur result jnana ki kosis ki but she caught me saying that I can recognise you anytime. Fir maine apne nam se I'd bnaya uska result puchha kuchh achhi achhi bate ki aur MN hi MN ye socha ki finally the end which should have been is going to be on a good note. Fir maine wo I'd delete kr diya. Fir maine ussase contact krne ki kbhi kosis nhi ki. Usko to ye sab yad bhi nhi hoga jitna maine likh diya hai aur accept bhi krta qunki ye meri story hai uski nhi. So here the first nd probably the last story of my life comes at its fence.
Good by (Sr. 5 July 2019)

A untold story of a star

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