#arandomlistofrandomness - 10
i) all my life, i have chucked off feelings like they are leeches. like what? i have been feeling and failing to validate my feelings. i am happy, sad, excited, needy, jealous, angry, cute, sweet, terrible and terrible. i feel terrible. i did jump when people threw compliments at me. i jumped inside, back then. i jump and dance literally, these days. improvement? acceptance?
ii) switching. confusion. choices. headaches. choices push me into a state of confusion; i cannot stand, i keep switching. being forced to stand still gives me headaches. i feel terrible. choose HG, choose. take a side, take your stand. i tell myself to not mull over decisions that have already been made. if i abide by that, then i'll not know what to do with life. my life's been a circle of brooding over past choices.
iii) friendships have become hard because i said, "Friendships are hard" or are friendships hard and i have decided to come to terms with it? do i carve complications out of relationships or is it really.. a package? come to think of it, my friendship with all my friends are not even a wee bit same. i even wonder if my friends or my friends or just people who got used to me over time. i can't talk about this. this is sensitive.
#yqbaba
