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gabbyjosef1846
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Gabby Josef

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636f660ac655236111c046a575fa1540

Gabby Josef

I stare into the empty arms of my father hoping he'd embrace me I gaze at my mother- hers ignores me in the distance They never said those words His father never said it to him Her mother refused to Maybe that's how "I love you" lost its value All these years through the tears and fears I have been trying to calculate the damage done by you by your mentality and what you believe to be true You slaughter me emotionally and offer me on a silver plate to vultures for having different opinions than you only to appease society You keep quoting the holy book but I've lost faith a long time ago still you keep trying to convince me that better- is something only you know Because of you I don't know what it's like to hold someone's hand and feel safe I don't know how to speak my mind because "Children should be seen and not heard" I don't know how to express myself because in this community it's nothing but a curse I know better though, I'd hate to be nothing but a black spot on your clean canvas I wish I was perfect that I had a clean slate that I could just belong and that's this didn't have to be another sad song I wish you healed before you birthed me maybe then I would understand what it means to be happy - Gabriella S. Josef #reading #nojoto #yqbaba

#reading nojoto #yqbaba #Life_experience

636f660ac655236111c046a575fa1540

Gabby Josef

#poem #nojotovideo

636f660ac655236111c046a575fa1540

Gabby Josef

I don't know when love became something foreign what I do remember is you building a house made of sand windows made out of autumn leaves oblivious to the emotions of the wind that blew our foundation away eventually you in the kitchen preparing a meal assuming that I was never hungry making me beg for a morsel thinking only you could fill me a bed stained with the touch of others whose names you doused when you stuffed your mouth with mine mountains reeking of lust a landslide where rocks of apathy consumed all of me no longer being considered pretty just dirty by everyone around me I keep tracing steps back to the past there's you I can't stomach footprints of everyone I begged to leave in your name monsters I fought as I begged yoú to leave I knock on the door furiously and no one answers no one lives there anymore I need answers but someone once told me: "You let the dead stay dead." °Gabriella S. Josef° #nojoto2020 #poem #africanwriters #newwritersclub #story

#nojoto2020 #poem #africanwriters #newwritersclub #story

636f660ac655236111c046a575fa1540

Gabby Josef

You. Are you still answering when ghost from the past rings? Are you still holding on to lost things? Do you still feel lovelorn? Forlorn? Abandoned by home and seeking shelter in the arms of those you scorn? You- Are you okay? Have you forgiven yourself yet? Are you still faking smiles in the sunlight while tears clings to your pillow at night? Are you still trying to fight when your mind tells you to take flight? Are you present? Your happiness- is it still evanescent? Are we still the same person? My reflection embodies confidence while yours reeks of negligence You're so cruel to yourself. Your breath keeps escaping you. Your thoughts run away from you. Your heart keeps beating, unwillingly because you won't let yourself be free You- I know you You're an agglomeration of anomalies, always flying high with the birds and bees, but as soon as you feel a breeze you fall back down on your knees You're much more than what the naked eye can see You're blind to your own beauty on the inside and within, but I can see I am you. You are me. #chai #you #questions #poetry

#chai #you #Questions #Poetry

636f660ac655236111c046a575fa1540

Gabby Josef

I don't know how to love, if it isn't with all of me I don't know how to love, if it isn't wholeheartedly I can love you and you, me, but still ask myself- What does this guy see in me? Are you here to feed my insecurities or the caress the neglected bones underneath my skin? Is it only me ? Am I the only one who can make your world spin ? Am I really the one you love with all your heart? Do you really see me as art? Why are you here? I don't know how to love, I don't know how to love properly. No one ever taught me. No one told me that I shouldn't envy those who came before me. They neglected to tell me that I should not be searching for home within another person, unless I've already found me. They didn't tell me to foster myself before fostering hopes on people who were still seeking themselves I don't know how to hold on. I don't know how to love. I don't know how to love without losing my sanity #Fire #art #idontknow #love #poem #wholeheartedly

Fire art idontknow love poem wholeheartedly

636f660ac655236111c046a575fa1540

Gabby Josef

not an apology

not an apology #poem

636f660ac655236111c046a575fa1540

Gabby Josef

#LOVEguitar #selflove

#LOVEGUITAR #selflove #poem


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