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To be happy in one’s own happiness and sad in one’s own sadness is beastliness, while to be happy in others’ happiness and sad in others’ sadness is humanity. Therefore, as long as, a man does not develop the nature of becoming happy in others’ happiness, and sad with others’ sadness, he does not deserve to be called a man. His appearance may be like a man, but in fact he is not a man. So long as a man is happy in his own happiness and sad with his own sorrows, it means that he has not developed humanity in him.
He who harms others for his own happiness and pleasure, does not deserve to be called a man. A man is he who having renounced his selfishness, does good to others or at least does not in the least cause any suffering to others. Therefore the lesson that needs to be learned is that let no one experience any pain or suffering, in the least bit through our actions. Besides trying to relieve the people of their sufferings, we should aim at their welfare, keeping in the forefront, how they can be benefited? May all beings be benefited!
“Remain engrossed in the welfare of all.” (Gita 5/25; 12/4).
We are only responsible for the welfare of others to the extent of our ability, power and resources. No one can make everyone happy. Even all the men in the world pulling all their resources together, cannot make a single man happy. The reason is that as a man’s desire for prosperity, pleasures, honor and praise etc., are fulfilled, the more they are strengthened. In the Manasa, it is mentioned,
“Jimi pratilaabh lobh adhikaayi,”
“The more a man gains, the more greedy he becomes.”
Even on acquiring an abundance of riches, the man can’t be satisfied. When the entire world together cannot make a single man happy, how can then one man relieve all people of the world of their suffering? However, all can adopt the feelings and sentiments, of wishing well for other’s welfare, i.e. “How can all be happy?”, whether he is a brother or a sister, young or old, rich or poor. No one is deprived of this right.
He who does good to others according to his power, God does good to him according to His power. If he applies all his power to do good to others, then God also applies all His power to do good to him. When God applies His powers, then how can he remain unhappy? No one can ever make him unhappy; and such a person attains God. The Lord declares -
“Te praapnuvanti maameva sarvabhootahite rataah.”
“Those who are engrossed in the welfare of all beings attain Me.” (Gita 12/4).
We should wish -
“Sarve Bhavantu Sukhinah;
Sarve Santu Niraamayaah |
Sarve Bhadraani pashyantu,
Maa kaschid dukhabhaagbhavet ||
“May all be happy, May all be free from diseases, May all attain benediction and May no one suffer in the least.”
He who wishes everyone to be happy, healthy and totally free from all sufferings, deserves to be called a human being. As long as he is not saddened by the sufferings of others, till then he cannot be considered to be a man. Second point is that, he who empathizes and identifies with the suffering of others, does not grieve from his own grief. You all pay attention! Only he, who does not have compassion for the joys and sorrows of others, has to suffer. Only he who is a pleasure seeker, and hankers after riches, experiences the void of and lack of happiness. But he, who is happy with the happiness of others, never has a shortage of happiness. How? His desire for enjoyment and pleasures perishes.
The desire for pleasures and prosperity is the main obstacle to God Realization. Sense pleasures and hoarding, will not permit man to realize God. The reason is that when he hoards, he does this with his body, and when he enjoys pleasures, he does so with his body. So if a man is attached to the body, an effigy of bone and flesh, if he is a slave to these, how can he attain spiritual enlightenment? But he, who is happy in the happiness of others, ceases to have the desire for happiness or pleasure, while he who is moved and distressed in the sadness of others ceases to have the desire for hoarding.
On being moved with the sufferings of others, man thinks of relieving the sufferers of their sufferings. Just as we spend money to relieve ourselves of our pain, similarly, we will be willing to spend money to relieve others off their sufferings. We will not be able to hoard too much money! Even if it is accumulated, we shall not remain attached to it, by thinking that it belongs to others. It is therefore mentioned in the Bhagawat -
Yavad brhiyeta jatharam taavat svatvam hi dehinaam |
Adhikam yo’bhimanyeta sa steno dandamarhati || (7/14/8)
A man is authorized to possess only the bare necessities of life. It means that the food which satisfies your hunger, the water which quenches your thirst, the clothes and house which are necessary for the bare maintenance of your body, are yours. One who lays a claim to anything else besides these bare necessities of life is a thief and will be punished. You may say that you have not got these from somewhere else, these are your own. But how are they yours? Did you bring even a single thing with you when you were born? Will you carry even a single coin with you when you die? Therefore all the extra things with us belong to those who have a shortage of these. He who is sad with the sadness of others, never hankers after pleasure and prosperity. His heart is filled with compassion which provides him with such a relish or joy which cannot be provided by mundane pleasures.
If you amass riches, it means that within there is cruelty, lack of compassion. Where there is compassion, there is no amassing of possessions for one’s pleasure. Why? Because he is naturally joyful! The happiness that comes from hoarding is of the modes of passion and ignorance. The happiness which is derived by being happy in the happiness of others is not changed into pleasures and prosperity, but it is a kind of bliss! a very joyful feeling!
He whose nature and inner sentiments (bhaav) are to share in the sufferings of others, can never ever enjoy pleasures while others are suffering. A person with a noble heart can’t cook and relish delicious dishes, if his neighbor is starving. Under such circumstances, he can’t relish food at all. But those people who cause suffering to others, will they suffer on accord of other’s sufferings? Such people who cause suffering to others for their own happiness, dishonor others for their own honor, blame others for their own praise, dismiss others for their own position, don’t deserve to be called human beings. They are not human beings at all. They are animals! Animals that are so lowly, that they have neither horns, nor tails. They possess human body and beasty nature. Birds and beast are purified by reaping the fruit of their sinful actions. But vile persons, who cause sufferings to others, pave the way to hells by committing new sins. In the Ramcharitramanasa Lord Rama says to Vibhishana –
Baru bal baas narak kar taataa |
Dusht sang jani deyi bidhaataa || (Manas 5/46/4)
O’ dear friend, it is better to live in hell, but let providence not give us the company of vile persons (Manasa 5/45/4)
It is vile to be happy and sad with one’s own happiness and sadness. Our stay in hells will expiate our sins and purify us, while company of the vile will lead us to different kinds of hells.
Animals don’t incur sins by causing suffering to others because the ordinance of sins and virtues is applicable to human beings only. Birds and beasts cause suffering to others in order to satisfy their hunger, rather than for pleasure and prosperity. But a millionaire or a multi-millionaire that goes on hoarding wealth by causing suffering to others does not deserve to be called a human being. He is worse than an animal. This human life aims at purification. Those who cause suffering to others commit sins and they will have to reap horrible fruits.
The inner sense of those who don’t feel happy in the happiness of others and compassionate with sorrow of others is impure. Their impure inner sense paves the way to hell for them. The inner sense of animals is not so much impure because they don’t kill beings for pleasure. They satisfy their hunger with the kill. Men are free to perform new actions while animals have to reap the fruit of their past actions. Men prepare delicious dishes and relish them and thus they incur sin. True humanity consists in being happy with others’ happiness and sad with others sadness. So every human being should have the sentiment how can all beings be happy and how can they be relieved of their sufferings?
नारायण ! नारायण ! नारायण
From "Ease of God Realization" in Hindi and English by Swami Ramsukhdasji
14 Steps To Really Start Living And Stop Existing
We are really lucky to be given a gift so precious. But, not all of us realize the value of life. Think about the kid who came into this world and died right away. It missed seeing its family, the blue of the sky, in fact, its chances of experiencing what a true laugh really feels like also died with him.
And we? We were brought into this world, but living it was entirely upon us. And we forgot all about it. Now, most of us are busy dying while we are still alive. We aren’t grateful enough. We don’t realize life’s value. And one day, we will be lying on our beds in misery, counting hours until the heart stops beating.
But, do we want to land into that situation willingly? None of us do, of course. So, before you totally run out on your days that offer you immense opportunities to live, make sure you….
1. Quit that job you have been going to for years with a morose face
Image sourceNobody deserves to be unhappy for years at a stretch and call it a life! Keep doing efforts, but while busting your butt to make some money, don’t stop respecting yourself.
2. Stop breathing for someone else
Image sourceWe make our lives by ourselves, for ourselves. It is our decisions, our risks, our mistakes that keep us walking towards the land of all things fine. But, if we start to please everyone on our journey, our ultimate goal will become a blur. We will lose the track of our road.
3. But, be closer to people you love
Image sourceYes, please them instead. Love them. Stay close with them. Because as we said, it is just one life, and it never comes with a preset expiration date.
4. Respect your originality
Image sourceAll of us carry our own unique baggage of thorns and flowers. The day you start respecting yourself for what you possess and lack, you will start to take others approval/disapproval of yours with a pinch of salt.
5. Make that call. Make that arrangement.
Image sourceCall up that dance class you had been eyeing at every evening on your way to home from office, call up that friend you fought with severely, but can’t afford to imagine your life without. Do that thing for your parents they had been asking of you for years now, the thing you had been lazy for. Do it. You will feel lighter. Happier.
6. Ditch worrying about things that aren’t in your control
Image sourceAnd the things that are in your control, what’s the need to worry about them? Just make efforts.
7. Don’t let your dreams die out simply because they require the kind of money you don’t own
Image sourceKeep them alive. Work towards realizing them, one step at a time. It will happen. At least do your bit of trying so that there are no regrets when you rest on your deathbed.
8. But on your way to realizing dreams, don’t forget to embrace the NOW.
Image sourceYou can be travelling alone in the city bus on a hot Sunday, you can be lying on a stretcher with a broken leg, you can perhaps be feeling annoyed through and through. Regardless of the type of situation, embrace it. Don’t ignore the feelings. Hug them tight. Go through it all, the pain and the happiness, to emerge wise, experienced and mature.
In short- Live. It. All.
9. But, don’t get stuck in the NOW.
Image sourceMoments pass, no matter how toxic or refreshing. They all pass. Learn to let go. Embrace your new NOWs.
10. Especially, the toxic moments. The sooner you run away from them, the better.
Image sourceBecause you deserve to be happy. And if you aren’t happy, how will you ever be able to keep your loved ones happy?
11. Be nice.
Image sourceSure you aren’t here to impress those who walk on the road with you everyday, but know nothing of you. But, you are here to make yourself happy. And the glee that comes from being warm and nice to people without expecting anything in return, is a feeling that stays unparalleled. And, not that you should care, but it is not easy for people to remember the list of your achievements, it is the qualities of your heart that they never forget.
12. Really, really listen to your heart.
Image sourceBecause those who don’t follow their own heart, don’t really live.
The true voice of your heart gets subdued in the thick of anger, temporary temptations, disgust, pride, extreme ambitiousness, work pressure, etc. Clear the clouds for a second and really listen to your heart. What would you want to do if they didn’t hold a virtual knife of burden near your throat? Would you be walking out in some street taking the feels of the weather? Playing with the street kids? Feeling happy? Listen to your heart, then!
No matter what it says, listen to it. Even if your decision turns out to be something wrong, at least you will get to learn something out of it.
13. Speak up before it is too late
Image sourceStop dying while your heart is still pumping sufficient blood. Step aside from the wrong opinions being followed simply because they have the vote of the majority. Stay true to yourself and don’t cut back from voicing what’s right. You have one life, don’t let your voice die inside of you.
14. On your long list of goals, give ‘happiness’ the top spot.
Image sourceDon’t get into making money and attracting fame so bad, that you forget what it is like to enjoy a happy quiet in talking to someone special. Or, what it is like to read a book, or to experience a blissful slumber. Give happiness the immense priority. And you don’t have to live to achieve it, you just have to live it. It’s that simple. And the most simple way to do so is by giving more attention to things you love, things that do something to your heart. And by keeping a safe distance from things that instil in you the negative vibes.
I don’t believe in 7-lives crap, I don’t believe in tomorrow. I don’t even know what life has in store for me right about 2 hours from now. More of nonsense drama maybe, or more of giggles, or perhaps more of I-don’t-know-whats.
But, no matter how tasty or sour, I have to find the happy from it all. I will have to create humour out of it all. Because I don’t want to come under the damn truck on a sad note. I want a happy ending. And I am sure, so is the case with you.
HOW DO YOU MEASURE YOUR LIFE ?
Simple algebraic equation of LIFE: aX + bY + c = P
Where P is what do we want in Life?C is a constant on which we do not have any controlX and Y are the variables on which we have a controlA and B are again constants on which we do not have control.Generally the most difficult thing is to find the right question, right problem, right objective that is P. We have so many forces acting on us and hence, with those generally what we chase is P+K or some other shit. For some people P keeps on changing with time, because they are never sure if its the right thing which they want in life?
Hence, to measure your life or to bring peace in your life or to become happy in your life or to get the sense of maturity in life, where no external factor creates any trouble in your life, firstly you need to find what do you want?
Second is what you need is variables of things that basically will take you to thing/situation/goal you have in mind. List down all the things.
For example: My objective in life is bring a +ve change in human's life at global/mass level. (I have introspective in terms of why I need this and at what cost and etc)
My next question is that to achieve this what do I have to do? i.e. list down your variables.
Start chasing your variablesFor few those the value of A/B will be higher and hence they might need to put a lower X/Y, but for you may be the value of A/B is lower and hence you would need to put more hard work to make sure that AX+BY becomes equal to P, even if the value of C is zero.In this time sometimes the variable B becomes negative, i.e. your family angle, your society angle, your girl friend doesnt want you to reach P, because in thr perspective, they think either it is un-achievable or they will lose you as an individual once you reach P. What do you do when something like this happen ? Increase X, the only variable truly in your hand.--------------------------------------------Few lines from some where which I like:
Because it’s all in how you choose to measure success. I don’t measure my success by displays of monetary wealth. I prefer to measure it based on social and global impact. Is that totally self-serving and biased? Absolutely. And that’s the point: You get to choose how you measure success.
Most of us are never told this. It’s not something we pick up in school or church. In fact, most of our social systems are built with their own metrics of success built into them which we are then expected and sometimes forced to follow. Get good grades. Make tons of money. Go to church. Buy nice things. Raise a nice family. Watch football.
It’s vital that we remember that they’re not absolute. We shouldn’t limit ourselves to them. Money is nice, but one can choose to see it not as the absolute measure of wealth, but as a useful tool to help achieve true wealth. Religion gives billions of people’s lives moral direction, but that doesn’t require one to believe in religion to be a good, moral person. Relationships and family are important, but lacking them doesn’t make you any less valuable as a person.
Again, we get to choose. And the beauty and the frustration is that we’re all different, so most of the time our metrics will be different.
The Happiness Hypotheticals are powerful tools because they can show us what metrics of success actually matter for us. Many of us think relationships will make us happy, but emotional health should be the goal and relationships the side effect. Many think popularity will make them happy, but one should do something important and noble and let the fame be the side effect.
As humans, we’re all driven by happiness and meaning, but we often get caught up in unnecessary status concerns and superficial comparisons. When we create hypothetical either/or situations between those comparisons and happiness, it can quickly sort our priorities out for us. Tools such as these show us ways in which we can measure our own success.
I’m not famous, but I improve people’s lives. That makes me successful. You’re single and alone right now, but you’re happy and proud of yourself. That makes you successful.
We must take care in choosing the way in which we measure success because the metrics we choose will determine all of our actions and beliefs.
The metrics of success which we choose lead to long-term real life consequences, and they determine everything.