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You don’t have to get married

’I’m not a big fan of marriage
I think marriage takes really talented dreamers and creative beings that are capable of creating real change and puts them inside this widely accepted institution of marriage, where they will then spend most of their time, emotions, magic, and valuable energy trying to be “good“ citizens and live up to the impossible ”perfect marriage/perfect family“ illusion that has been so successfully placed in our heads. Marriage also has the potential to produce a lethal feeling that we now have ownership of another soul because they said “I do,” gave us a ring and signed a contract saying they would not leave us (do you ever stop to look at how crazy it all is?).
One of the greatest deceptions we can fall victim to is the lie that we should need someone else in our life in order to be complete.
We are set up waiting for Mr. or Mrs. right to come along so that we can begin our life and be truly happy
I’ve been with the same man for 15 years and we still really, really like each other. I think that has a lot to do with the fact that we each stand alone, beautiful, creating light, both working toward helping each other reach our individual goals. We are so incredibly different, but neither of us is fighting to change the other. We have grown to respect and appreciate each other as we are. We don’t need one another. We enjoy each other, but we don’t need each other... there’s a big difference. The most unromantic line in the world is ”you complete me" — it literally makes me want to scream when I hear it at weddings. I want to complete myself.

Spin solo until you are in perfect harmony with source and are able to create magic alone. Then you can, if you choose, attract someone who can spin along side you. The result is two beautiful souls who are spinning separately, but in perfect harmony... that’s where magic happens!

What about children?

I don’t believe we were all meant to have children and the pressure created by our culture to have a family is RIDICULOUS! That being said, once the decision to have children is made or made for you, then yes, it’s beneficial for their sake to find a mate willing to help you give them the best life possible. That doesn’t mean you both live in the same house, but you are committed to working together peacefully to make sure the children are given the support they need to grow into healthy, confident and emotionally stable members of society.
If you do get married, because that’s what you want... WONDERFUL! Just make sure to keep your expectations realistic and be open and honest about how you’re feeling. It’s unhealthy for anyone to be in a long term relationship where they feel trapped and miserable. It’s also why we have so much trauma related to relationships in our life that didn’t last... mother/father, first love, etc. because we had this fairy tale image of what love looks like and when it turned out different we were crushed.
Don’t marry your soul mate

Billy is a good friend (the best, really). He’s the man that thinks I’m wonderful, amazing and incredibly gorgeous. He’s all in and ready to help and support me and this unit in anyway he can. He’s the most incredible father and team-mate. We are perfect for each other in so many ways. We bring out the best in each other almost always. We don’t need or cling to each other and are able to stand alone even though we’d prefer to stand together. This relationship is easy and gets shit done. Billy is sweet, patient... downright wonderful and I love him, but he’s not my soul mate in some kind of mystical, ancient bond, finish your sentences kind of way. We are together in a perfectly unique union that has a purpose completely unique to itself.

What is a soul mate? Is there such a thing? Each of us will answer these questions differently depending on your belief system. I personally believe soul mates are people we’ve been connected to since the beginning of time. People that weave in and out of this massive interconnected web that is a collection of our many lives. Souls matched perfectly with ours to help us grow. Our soul mate or mates aren’t always meant to be our lovers. I think this is really important for all of us to understand. As a culture we seem to struggle with understanding deep relationships that aren’t sexual or unions that aren’t romantic, but have a greater purpose. Any deep connection sensed between two people is meant to become romantic, right? No. There are all kinds of connections in this wild life.
I believe soul mates exist and they will show up in each life when you need them. They come to push you, challenge you, wake you up and push you forward. Honestly, you’re probably better off not marrying that person, because then you’ll get caught up in creating the ideal marriage (WHATEVER THE HELL THAT EVEN IS) and forget why your souls were put together from the beginning. You’ll all too easily forget that your job is to help each other evolve as quickly as possible not torture each other into this bizarre role we’ve created that a husband and wife ought to play. Because who knows what that looks like for each of us. Lord knows we’ve all experienced interesting versions of those characters.
It’s this idea that one person is supposed to meet all of our needs that sets us up for heartache and disappointment. Instead, why don’t we look first at what it is we would like our relationship with another human to create or accomplish. Then believe that the universe will send us a perfect match for that goal. If you just want to have great sex and travel around the world then you will call forth a completely different soul than if you want to raise a family. If you aren’t sure, just trust me on this one. Knowing exactly what we want is the first step to being able to create the most magical union ever.
Listen, I’m not an expert, and I certainly haven’t figured it all out. I do know one thing for certain though, and that is the reality that what we are doing is working. How many happy couples do you know? Okay. How many do you know that have been together longer than a few years and have kids? Not just comfortable, but truly happy. It makes you wonder if we have it all wrong. We are all searching for that crazy, wild, intense love of our life to match up with and stay with that person at all costs till death do us part. Maybe, just maybe, we should be looking for something completely and totally different.
Let’s rewrite the norm.
Let’s hack parenting, love, partnerships, friendships, connections, soul mate unions, LIFE, and marriage as we know it and create what works, what feels right to our soul without being afraid of upsetting the norm.
Because in case no one has told you, normal is WAY overrated.

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Marriage ❌

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Marriage is a very risky option. Let me explain you the whole thing through a story.

Arrange marriage :

Divya (imaginary name) was married to a guy, named Ravi (imaginary name). In the beginning of their married life, Divya was trying to understand her in laws and also her husband. Even Ravi was very calm nature he was with her in every situation.
But the problem arrived after few years, when their financial condition was not good and Ravi felt alone but his wife Divya stood with him and helped him financially.
Days passed and now Ravi is jobless and eveything is handled by Divya. Everyday she wakes up early and do every household work plus she started doing a job.
She came home late because she was working extra hours, and on the second hand Ravi do nothing at home. He just watch tv and now he was not even trying to solve all the things. He was enjoying being jobless. He didn't felt thankful of his wife.

Days passed and Divya was still doing job to solve all financial problems and simultaneously she was handling her household works.
One day she asked her husband "i am working outside so you should atleast help me at home".
Then suddenly Ravi shouted and blamed her for wanting him to do useless household work.


I only want to indicate the truth through this , that if one is working hard to maintain relationship than other doesn't even value it. A relationship is a mutual ship in which both the person should contribute equally.


(Now another story)

Love Marriage:

Kunal (imaginary name) was married to Payal(imaginary name). Both were deeply in love with each other so they decided to stay together forever.
So the twist occurs here when Kunal was so busy in his business that he was not giving time to his wife.
Payal was very understanding but sometimes her patience gets out of control and she argue with Kunal.Then everytime kunal say sorry.
As the time was passing, payal was also going far from him.
And one day she decided for divorce.
Kunal was shocked about divorce, he apologised her but nothing worked,
because she started liking someone else when his husband was busy.

And finally they both were divorced.


So my perspective of telling two different stories of two different types of marriages is that it does not matter whether you are arranged or loved. Matter here is, if two people want to stay together forever then one of them has to compromise.

And why one should compromise when the other person is not even understanding the problem.

And according to me it is very dangerous option to get married because compromise could be one time
but marriage wants compromise every day, which is not good.

Is getting married good only because of fear of being alone. But what's the use of that partner with whom your heart is filled with tears and you get frustrated of everyday issues.

Ya i know life goes in zig zag motion so we should accept the reality that marriage is important in indian society and after marriage issues are part of life.
BUT WHY?
As,life will remain same if we will not select the option of marriage then why moving in zig zag motion for others, we can taste the tastes of life alone also.


In short 😀 Don't get married 😂

#Nojoto

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What are the books that can change people's lives?


#1. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho [Fable]



There are millions of Books but none like this one. This is a masterpiece in FOLLOWING YOUR DREAMS tale. This is the story of a boy who followed his dreams. You can understand everything about the Universe, Dreams, and Life in this one epic adventure. If you want to read one and only one book, then I would recommend this one only.

Two of the most powerful quotes from the book:

There is ONE GREAT TRUTH on this planet:
Whoever you are, or whatever it is that you do, when you want something, it is because that desire originated in the soul of the Universe. It is your mission on earth.

To realize one’s destiny is a person’s only real obligation. All things are one. When you want something; all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.

#2. Think & Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill [Personal Development]



Napoleon Hill interviewed "40 millionaires" to discover the common thought processes and behavior that had led to their success. His study of these "best practices" was revolutionary in a world where it was largely assumed that great wealth resulted from a combination of greed and luck.

Best quote: "All the breaks you need in life wait within your imagination. Imagination is the workshop of your mind, capable of turning mind energy into accomplishment and wealth."

#3. Power of Your Subconscious Mind by Dr. Joseph Murphy [Mind Programming]



This book will unleash the hidden treasure in your mind. This book that can change you as a person and can re-program your personality and can attract anything and everything you want. Most importantly it is full of case studies and affirmative techniques that you can start using immediately. 'The Power of Your Subconscious Mind' will open a world of success, happiness, prosperity, and peace for you.

Best Quote: “As you sow in your subconscious mind, so shall you reap in your body and environment.”

#4. As A Man Thinketh by James Allen [Personal Development]



It's a classic written in 1902. It explains how your thoughts mold your personality, and how that personality drives you to take action and determines the type of action you'll take.

Best quote: "The dreamers are the saviors of the world. As the visible world is sustained by the invisible, so men, through all their trials and sins and sordid vocations, are nourished by the beautiful visions of their solitary dreamers."

#5. The Secret By Rhonda Byrne [Law of Attraction]



Most people love this book, and some hate it. But this is the book that lights up more life than any other books in Self-help arena by unfolding the secret to the Universe. It holds the treasure to the Universal Law of Attraction. Read this book and it will help you in every area of life while keeping you motivated.

Many people hate this book also because they consider it like a one stop solution. Remember no book can change anyone’s life jut by reading but only with the consistent application, it shows the result. Moreover, read this book and the follow the next two books by Rhonda Byrne The Power & The Magic and together they will give you the real action plan to manifest your dreams. Millions and millions have changed their life with these three books only. So don't buy the negative feedback from anyone ..Read them and try it and see the result.

Best Quote: “Be grateful for what you have now. As you begin to think about all the things in your life you are grateful for, you will be amazed at the never-ending thoughts that come back to you of more things to be grateful for. You have to make a start, and then the law of attraction will receive those grateful thoughts and give you more just like them.”

#6. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey



Our habits build or break our life. This book will help you develop better habits

It also convinces you that acquiring them will make you a better person.

Best quote: "Sow a thought, reap an action; sow an action, reap a habit; sow a habit, reap a character; sow a character, reap a destiny."

#7. Awaken the Giant Within by Tony Robbins



This a masterpiece from Tony Robbins, which align emotional state and physical dynamics to bring any kind of transformation in life. Which is now more popularly known as NLP but this book will take you deep inside the process and how to apply in life to achieve a massive result.

Best quote: "If you can't, you must. If you must, you can."

“Live life fully while you're here. Experience everything. Take care of yourself and your friends. Have fun, be crazy, be weird. Go out and screw up! You're going to anyway, so you might as well enjoy the process. Take the opportunity to learn from your mistakes: find the cause of your problem and eliminate it. Don't try to be perfect; just be an excellent example of being human.”

#8. The Science Of Getting Rich by Wallace D. Wattles [Self-Help]



This book is a practical manual on how to program your mind, feelings and actions to become rich in life. And here rich not only means money but if you follow the same, you will become rich with happiness, health and love also.

#9. Psycho Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz [Self-Help]



This is a very powerful book about Self-Image. There is no other Self-Help book as scientific as this. With tons of examples and case studies, this book is a treasure house of Action Plans to follow.

This is a book take deep dive into the power of imagination, relaxation and hold the secret to HIGH-PERFORMANCE in any field.

Best Quote: “A human being always acts and feels and performs in accordance with what he imagines to be true about himself and his environment...For imagination sets the goal ‘picture’ which our automatic mechanism works on. We act, or fail to act, not because of ‘will,’ as is so commonly believed, but because of imagination.”

#10. Chicken Soup for the Soul by Jack Canfield & Mark Victor Hansen (Inspirational Stories)



Chicken Soup for the Soul is a collection of motivational essays and true stories about ordinary people’s lives, compiled by Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen. After 144 publishers had rejected the book, it was finally accepted by a small firm, and became a roaring success. You will love the inspirational tales, and it will serve as a daily motivation at the times of difficulties.

Chicken Soup series one of the highest selling books ever and only Harry Potter series has surpassed their sales volume.

Apart from the above ten books with details, I am listing the list of other books with title, and I believe you will explore them:

#11. How to Win & Influence People by Dale Carnegie (Self-Help)

#12. The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle (Inspirational & Spiritual)

#13. The Power by Rhonda Byrne (Law of Attraction)

#14. The Magic by Rhonda Byrne (Law of Attraction)

#15. Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki (Self-help & Personal Finance)

#16. You Can Heal Your Life by Luis Hay (Self-Help & Wellbeing)

#17. The Success Principles by Jack Canfield (Inspirational)

#18. Way of the Peaceful Warrior by Dan Milman (Inspirational & Memoir)

#19. You can Win by Shiv Khera (Self-Help)

#20. The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari by Robin Sharma (Inspirational & Fable)

#21. Autobiography of a Yogi (Autobiography/Inspirational)

#22. Steve Jobs by Walter Isaacson (Biography, Entrepreneurship)

#23. Made in Japa by Akio Morita (Autobiography, Entrepreneurship)

#24. Losing My Virginity by Sir Richard Branson (Autobiography, Entrepreneurship)

#25. 4-Hours Work Week by Tim Ferriss (Productivity, New Life Style)

#26. The $100 Start-Up by Chris Guillebeau (Entrepreneurship)

#27. Change Your Thoughts Change Your Life by Dr.Wayne Dyer (Self-help)

#28. Talent is Overrated by Geoffrey Colvin (Science of Success / Productivity)

#29. The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg (Science of Success / Productivity)

#30. WINGS of FIRE by Dr.APJ Abdul Kalam (Autobiography & Inspirational) - One of my most favourite book.


1. Philosophy: The Open Society and Its Enemies of Karl R. Popper. Although those are two Volumes (I and II) the topic is the same. In the first Volume Karl Popper makes a brilliant analysis of ancient philosophers (Plato and Aristotle in particular) and how they influenced our culture till those day. In the second Volume Popper focuses on Hegel and Marx and how they influenced modern times ideologies. Although Popper is the only modern philosopher with a scientific approach the open society is a harsh critique to how those philosophers’ interpretation of the world lead eventually to the birth antidemocratic ideologies. Believe me when I say that this is one of the most mind-blowing texts ever written. In addition Popper’s style is very simple and captivating.

how did it change my life? Popper is one of the first philosophers which look at other philosophers with a skeptical eye. Once you read Popper you realize that also Plato and Aristotle were men and as such they made mistakes. Therefore, you don't take anything for given anymore.

2. Neuroscience:  Soft-Wired How the New Science of Neuroplasticity can change your life – Dr. Michael Merzenich PHD. This book is going to open your mind on how our brain actually works. You will see many myths that you believed true throughout your life bust in the pages of “Soft-Wired”. The book is brilliant since it explains the new scientific findings but also how to improve your life through neuroplasticity. It is really a guide on how to live.

how did it change my life? Adter reading Soft-wired my belief system shifted. I no longer believed to be a fixed individual. In other words I realized that DNA plays a dismal role compared to life and experience. And if you are willing to put the effort you can change yourself at any time in life. Empowering!

3. Non-Fiction: The Black Swan – Nassim Nicholas Taleb

Taleb is going to open your eyes on many topics and human biases. If you read this book carefully, eventually you will understand things about yourself and society in general that you did not notice before.

how did it change my life? It made me realize how humans are biased. Join the modern skeptics!

4. Fiction – The Divine Comedy – Dante Alighieri

Absolutely the best work ever written by any account. Dante Alighieri mixes fiction (he travels through hell, purgatory before reaching heaven) with history. Indeed in this fantastic journey he encounters many historical figures. His guide throughout this spiritual journey will be the Latin author Virgil that he defines as great master.

how did it change my life? Reading Dante is like going back in time and meeting many of the greatest ancient authors and mythological characters. It makes you discover a world that you did not have idea existed. Enlightening!

5. Autobiographies: Anwar El Sadat: In Search of Identity an Autobiography.

The amazing, inspiring and heroic personality, Sadat (former Egyptian president eventually assassinated) tells his story that seems more a tale than a real story. Sometimes reality exceeds fiction and this is one of those cases.

how did it change my life? Sadat story gave me strength. We realize that our everyday challenges are nothing compared to the ones Sadat had to face throughout his life.





 

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aankho ki khata dil pe bhari thi
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